The Final Act of Haruki Suzumiya
by HuuskerDu
Summary: It has been 12 years since Kyon made his fateful decision to leave the world of The Disappearance of Haruhi Suzumiya. Kyon and Haruhi are now raising a family. One day Kyon's young female counterpart suddenly appears on their doorstep, the sole survivor of an armageddon that has destroyed her world. Kyonko is alone. Kyon then helps her with a crisis that could end the multiverse.
1. Chapter 1: His Final Act

**Disclaimer:**

**I do not own the Haruhi Suzumiya series. This is a work of fan fiction.**

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**A/N:**

This is a deep science fiction story. It will get into the meaning of life, the universe, and everything. (Hint: The answer is not 42.)

Some chapters will dive into epistemology and ontology (e.g., Chapters 4, 5 and 8), while others are mostly fluff (e.g., Chapters 3 and 7).

The story is rated 'T' for some implied enthusiastic marital sex scenes. (Hint: Haruhi does _everything_ over the top.) Also rated 'T' for some themes not suitable for pre-teens.

I admit I am playing around a lot in this story, with mind screw and lots of humor, but I am deadly serious about the philosophical arguments I'm making.

This story is part of a series. The opening story is _The Realization of Haruki Suzumiya._ For the link click on my handle (HuuskerDu). Although it is not necessary to read that story first it will help you ease into this one, especially if you are not already familiar with _Suzumiya Haruhi no Seitenkan_.

The final story is _The Memories of Haruki Suzumiya_. Read that story last.

**Important:** This story assumes that you have seen, at minimum, the first 6 episodes of _The Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya_ (2009) in chronological order (not airdate order) - up through the dream kiss - and the film _The Disappearance of Haruhi Suzumiya_ (2010).

If you are in a hurry you can spoil _Melancholy_ by simply reading Wikipedia and TV Tropes. Please pay particular attention to the character biographies for the three main characters: Kyon, Haruhi, and Yuki Nagato.

I strongly urge you to watch _The Disappearance of Haruhi Suzumiya _and not spoil it for yourself. The English dub on YouTube is excellent. _Disappearance_ is a profoundly moving experience (see the rave reviews on IMDB). Hideaki Hatta weaves a beautiful exponential protagonist arc that switches to 2nd gear at around 60 minutes in (1:00), jumps to 4th gear at 1:35, 6th gear at 1:43, then it just soars up into the stratosphere in a universe-changing climax at 2:00, and then downshifts to a tear-jerker at 2:25 for a whisper quiet denouement of pure joy. Un-freaking-believable. You must know _Melancholy_ first or that movie will make no sense at all. And you must know _Disappearance_ to make any sense of this fic. Trust me, it's worth it.

Finally, read my quick short breezy orientation fic, _The Realization of Haruki Suzumiya_ (click on my handle HuuskerDu above).

Then adjust your pod-racing goggles like young Anakin Skywalker and take a deep breath.

Are you ready? Then, dear reader, hold on tight, because you are about to go for a wild ride in what is probably the highest exponential protagonist arc ever written.

Because, like Buzz Lightyear, I am about to take you on a journey literally to infinity.

And beyond.

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**Chapter 1: His Final Act**

On the day that Haruki Suzumiya died I was busy preparing dinner in the kitchen.

I wiped my hands on my apron and checked the oven temperature. I then started on the ingredients for the hot pot. I was using an old recipe of Asahina's. Haruhi really liked my cooking.

Ayu ran into the kitchen. She was chasing the cat.

_I am falling_

The cat ran under the stool that was on the left side of the breakfast nook. As the little girl approached, the cat dodged and tried to escape. She lunged to cut it off.

I scolded her. "Ayu, please leave Shamisen alone."

"Kitty!"

The cat hissed.

"Stop it. He'll only start cussing again, and you are too young a lady to hear that kind of language."

Haruhi came into the kitchen. She pulled off her reading glasses.

"Kyon, just look at this. This is awful. Highway robbery."

_I am lost_

Earlier that morning the postman had delivered a certified-mail package. It was the proposed contract from the cable network.

She shoved the paperwork in my face. "Look here, on page 10, the residuals are only 8%. They must think we're chumps."

She flashed her fiery yellow-brown eyes at me. "There is no way I'm signing this!"

She put her reading glasses back on. She had another pair for distance and driving. Both pairs were on chains around her neck. It was a pity that she always wore those large rimless glasses. It made her look like Sarah Palin.

Now, don't misunderstand me, Sarah Palin is a rather attractive looking gal, and my Haruhi even more. It's just that I'm not into the hot-librarian look.

I waited for her diatribe to stop so I could resume making dinner. She shoved additional pages in my face while pointing out the contract clauses. I nodded but I wasn't listening.

I snuck a peek at her and grinned inwardly. I loved her so much. Granted, her energy level had slowed down, and her appearance wasn't what it was. Her hips were getting a bit wide. That didn't matter. She could look like Phyllis Diller for all I cared. It wouldn't change my feelings for her.

We fit so well together. We meshed. I think it was because my lackadaisical personality was the diametrical opposite of her own. I was understanding, passive, quiet, and sentimental. She was ethusiastic, passionate, active, and excitable. My laid-back personality complemented her fiery nature perfectly.

She finally harumphed and stomped out of the room while reading more of the contract aloud to herself. I resumed assembling the last ingredients for the hot pot.

_I am falling_

The cat had crept under the stool that was on the left side of the breakfast nook. Ayu approached to grab it. The cat tried to escape but she lunged to cut it off.

I moved the stool away and picked up Shamisen by the scruff of his neck. I scolded my daughter, "That's enough. Go play with your sister."

"But Daaaad..."

"Get! Go!"

_Sleep and dream_

The cat squirmed and kicked me, then bolted from my hands and fled into the hallway. Ayu squealed and ran out after it. That child never listens to me. She takes after her mother.

It was our other daughter that took after me.

Ouch. That was a nasty scratch. I pulled off my apron to get better access to the wounded area. I then went over to the drawer to find the Mycitracin.

I paused and rubbed my eyes with the back of my hand. I was really tired. For some reason I didn't get much sleep last night. The lack of sleep wasn't due to Haruhi's snoring. Her 80 decibels were no match for my industrial grade earplugs.

_Dream of me_

Actually, I didn't get any sleep at all. Every time I dozed off I would suddenly feel my stomach drop and I would lurch upright gasping. It had to be heartburn from that leftover chili. It was way too spicy.

I really need to knock off the late night raids on the refrigerator. I was doing it because Haruhi had put me on a strict diet.

The late night snacks have been giving me nightmares lately. The last one was pretty weird. I was all alone in a field of white. It was featureless and it felt like I was floating or falling. I saw two people, mere shadows. One of the shadows dissolved and I yelled something. Then I woke up with start and felt the heartburn going down my throat. I really should start taking some Pepcid AC before bedtime.

{ Koizumi: Kyon, we have a situation. }

I jumped. The sound of Koizumi's voice was coming from the small nickel-shaped subcutaneous transceiver hidden behind my left ear. I will never get used to that.

The Organization. After the events of four years ago, I had joined the Organization. I didn't volunteer. Koizumi drafted me.

It wasn't so bad. I was only a reservist. I had never participated in any ops. And the perks were good. They had a great dental plan.

I spoke using the subvocal technique that Koizumi taught me.

{ Kyon: Hi Koizumi! How you been, pal? I haven't heard from you in a while. }

{ Koizumi: Stop the idle chit-chat, Kyon. This channel is only for authorized Organization use. }

I sighed. When he was not wearing his mask he was always all business. I liked it so much better when he was just nothing more than a lackadaisical pretty boy, always polite and smiling.

He was all work and no play. I don't think the real Koizumi had ever taken a vacation in his life.

_Dream, please dream._

{ Kyon: So, how did that trip to Warehouse 13 go? }

{ Koizumi: Shut up. I need to give you a sit-rep. }

The real Koizumi was always curt towards me, sometimes downright rude.

{ Kyon: Can it wait? I'm busy making dinner. }

{ Koizumi: I said shut up. I'm reactivating you. }

I put my knife down on the kitchen counter. Not now, please not now.

{ Koizumi: Here's the sit-rep. The WMAP detected a huge change in the CMBR. It was isomorphic, aligned perfectly. Jumped from 3 Kelvins to 10. Non-temporal. The wavefront is retrograde. }

{ Kyon: Can you please translate that into non-geek? }

I could almost see the silent sigh on the other end of the link.

{ Koizumi: I'll start over. A few years ago the mundanes over at NASA launched an unmanned spacecraft called the Wilkinson Microwave Anisotropy Probe, the WMAP. The purpose of the WMAP is to measure the CMBR, the Cosmic Microwave Background Radiation, It's the remnant of the radiation from the Big Bang. }

Oh boy, here we go again.

Koizumi was always philosophizing about how the universe started. He said that although the universe appeared to be billions and billions of years old, it was actually created by my wife about 16 years ago. It only looked older because of something called M-gauge expansion and superinflation, basically some kind of rapid acceleration of space and time. I never pretended to understand it.

_Am I dead_?

Personally, I think Koizumi's theories are a load of crap. Ok, smart boy, so where was Haruhi before 16 years ago, huh? Answer that.

{ Koizumi: The Organization uses the WMAP as an early warning system to alert us for UEEs. }

{ Kyon: UEE, oh yeah, a UEE.. Ok, I forgot what that is. }

{ Koizumi: Next time read your briefs. A Universe Ending Event. I know you throw away everything I send you. }

{ Kyon: Whatever. Haruhi's going to be pissed if dinner is late again. I can't do that three days in row. }

{ Koizumi: Kyon.. }

{ Kyon: You want no UEEs, right? Then leave me alone. If I'm late again my wife is going to give me a UEE up my backside. }

I was bluffing of course. Haruhi hasn't used her god-like reality-warping powers in years. She somehow suppresses it using some kind of mental technique that Nagato taught her. Suppress it, but not control it. She promised me she would never use those unconscious - and cosmically dangerous - powers ever again. I've always wondered, who, if anyone, had given her those powers in the first place.

Koizumi ignored me and resumed his babble.

{ Koizumi: The CMBR radiation is supposed to be only 3 degrees above absolute zero. But the WMAP is reporting that it just jumped up by another 7 degrees. And the wavefront is travelling backward in time. That's why we can see the change from billions of lightyears away. }

{ Kyon: Is there a reason why you are wasting my time with this cosmology lesson? I need to get the taiyaki out of the oven before it burns. }

{ Koizumi: It means a cataclysmic event of unimaginable power just happened. The MAGI think we're seeing the echo of some major multiverse disaster. }

{ Kyon: Whatever. I'm busy. }

"Hey kids! Dinner in 5 minutes!"

I could overhear Haruhi in the other room yelling on her cellphone. "Jack, you gotta fix this! There are landmines everywhere. Go look at page 22.. Yeah 22. See? They snuck in a liability clause and an indemnification clause. Those bastards!"

I spoke up to Haruhi. "Dear, hurry and finish will you? We're going to eat any minute."

She was yelling into the phone. "Tear it up and start over. Yes, tear it up!"

I rechecked the oven temperature. I could hear the sound of the starlings chirping outside. In the summer I always kept the front door open and used only the screen door. Their songs were beautiful.

{ Koizumi: I need to finish giving you your sit-rep. The MAGI are running sims. There are big deltas happening in higher dimensions. }

Whatever. He continued his geek babble. I really wish that motor-mouth would stop.

My mind was drifting again. The lawn was getting really shaggy. I'll have to mow it again soon. And the car was back the shop. They always try to screw me over on the bill.

Then I noticed that the birds had stopped singing.

Something didn't feel right.

I gradually became aware that there was some faint sound at the very edge of auditory perception. Something high pitched. Ultrasonic? The sound seemed to come from everywhere. I couldn't pinpoint it.

The sound increased, then it got irritating. My head started to throb.

Shamisen yowled. "Shit, make that stop!"

That cat's mouth was always filthy. In both senses of the word.

"Daddy.. my ears hurt."

Then I heard a very different noise. It seemed to come from outside the front door.

What is happening?

{ Koizumi: The MAGI think that several universes outside our own just died horribly. A lot of them. }

I heard a scream of a woman outside.

Universes outside our own? Could it.. oh no.. Please no.

I yelled, "Haruhi, stay here and watch the kids!"

"Kyon?"

"Stay here!"

I dropped everything and ran outside.

Please no.. it's not..

It was. It was Kyonko.

She was sprawled out on the grass. She was a complete wreck.

I ran over and bent down on my knees. I cradled her head.

"What are you doing here? It's ok. I got you."

She was sobbing, her whole body was shaking.

"He saved me. His final act."

"It's ok now. Calm down, it's ok. You're safe."

"No.. you don't understand.."

As I held her, she turned her head up to face mine. Her face a mass of tears.

"He saved me. Why didn't he save himself too?"

Oh my poor Kyonko.

"It's gone."

"Kyonko..?"

"It's all gone!"


	2. Chapter 2: Kyon Becomes a Space Cadet

**A/N:**

This story is part of a series. The opening story is _The Realization of Haruki Suzumiya._ For the link click on my handle (HuuskerDu). To best enjoy this sequel please read that story first.

The final story is _The Memories of Haruki Suzumiya_. Read that story last.

Please give me reviews! I am a dyslexic 200+ wpm touch typist who is nearly blind. I do spellcheck, but if you spot any word omissions, transpositions, wrong homonyms, etc., please post so I can fix them.

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**Chapter 2: Kyon Becomes a Space Cadet**

Later that day I escorted Yuki Nagato to the door and hugged her goodbye. She did not return the hug and just stood there frozen like a mannequin. This was perfectly normal and did not bother me a bit. For you see, Yuki Nagato was an alien, a Humanoid Interface, an ambassador from an unimaginably powerful group intelligence called the Data Integration Thought Entity. The Data Integration Thought Entity had sent Yuki Nagato to Earth to observe Haruhi.

Nagato was the first person who detected the impending disaster. She had somehow spotted the short-term hyperspace conduit that was forming on my front lawn. She immediately contacted Koizumi about both events. She knew she couldn't get to our house in time, so she told Koizumi to alert me via the transceiver.

That jerk. Instead of simply telling me that someone was going to drop-in on my front lawn, Koizumi had babbled in my ear for 15 minutes about cosmological physics. He was always obsessed with his stupid ontological philosophy, his theories of creation, and his theories about Haruhi's powers. Babble, babble, babble. He could have just told me up front what was happening.

When I had picked Kyonko up from the lawn she was disheveled and completely exhausted. Her ponytail had come undone, and long locks of hair streamed down the front her of face.

She was easy to carry. As soon as I picked her up she closed her eyes and relaxed. She knew she was safe now; I literally had her in my arms. As I walked back to the house I gently rubbed away one of the smudges and moved some of the locks off her face. She fell asleep before I could carry her 20 paces.

Nagato had arrived at the house just after I carried her inside. She checked Kyonko's vitals and pronounced that, except for some high cortisol stress levels and some minor scratches, she was physically fine.

I had laid her down on the kingsize bed in the master bedroom. Haruhi undressed her and cleaned her up. My wife then insisted on sleeping with her overnight. I had no objections. I remembered that big slumber party in Yuuki's apartment four years ago, when Haruhi was creeped out about the idea of sharing a bed with her own husband's gender opposite clone. This time Haruhi had no compunctions about it. This was an emergency, and Kyonko was family.

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I slept on the couch. Around 4 AM I woke up to find Haruhi pulling and pushing on my shoulder.

"She's been having nightmares. She won't sleep. You need to talk to her."

I sat up and rubbed the sleep out of my eyes. I poured a hot cup of instant black tea for the caffeine.

I found Kyonko sitting up with the covers rolled up in front of her. She saw me come in.

"I'm sorry Haruhi woke you up. I told her not to do that. I'm okay, really."

"Hey kid, having bad dreams?" I sat down in the chair on her right.

"Yeah."

"You want to tell me?" I held her hand. "You don't have to talk about it if you don't want to."

"No, it's okay.."

I waited.

"I was dreaming. I saw Yuuki. He was standing there. He said goodbye to me in my dream."

"Goodbye?"

"Yes. He said 'I love you' and then he said goodbye. I begged him not to leave, that I didn't want him to die, that I needed him, that he was my guardian angel. He re-assured me. He said that he had made some.. arrangements, that I would be okay. But that wasn't what I wanted. I didn't want him to go."

She looked up at me. "He said he was going to a better place. That he was looking forward to it."

"A better place?"

I recalled that the Data Integration Thought Entity created Yuuki by splitting off a small piece of itself. I assumed that Kyonko meant that Yuuki was going to re-merge with that great intelligence. That's where he was born, after all.

"I understand.. He told you he was returning back to the Data Integration Thought Entity."

"No."

What?

"Where did he say he was going?"

"Heaven."

Wait, what?

"I don't understand."

Yuuki couldn't possibly be religious. He was just a Humanoid Interface.

"Yuuki communicated it to me. I'm not sure how. It's kind of hard to explain.."

I was still sleepy. Dang it, that caffeine needed to kick in. This was probably important.

I really wanted to know.

"You think you can explain it to me?"

"I'll try. He didn't use words, it was non-verbal. Let me think for a moment."

I waited.

"Kyon, you've played video games, right?"

"Uh, sure."

"And there are characters that you play in those games. Role-play games, first person shooters, stuff like that."

"Ok."

"Within that video game, those characters exist. They have independent identities. They act, move, communicate, shoot each other, do stuff."

"Uh, Right."

"Kyon, what happens when you turn the video game off?"

I thought for a second. I didn't follow. So I said something random.

"I get up and get a sandwich."

"Exactly! Oh Kyon you do understand. I must say you catched on to it quicker than me. That was very good. You're smarter than I thought."

I was clueless. It was the first time she complimented me that way, that I was smarter than her. I didn't want to disabuse her of her wonderful praise. She waited with bright eyes. I spun my brain furiously, but came up snake eyes.

She waited a bit longer. Then her eyes dropped and she sighed.

The plain fact was obvious to us both: I was _not_ smarter than her. Far from it. Kyonko always tended to catch on quicker, spot things faster, and come to conclusions more quickly than I did.

Why was that? She was basically me after all, with the Y chromosome swapped for X. She had the same sized brain, same number of neurons, same basic intelligence that I did.

I think it was because I was basically lazy. She wasn't. She was always studious and got straight A's in school, while I barely squeaked my way into college.

It was because she exercised her brain a lot more than I did. The brain is a muscle. It needs exercise like any other part of the body. Don't use it and it will atrophy.

Kyonko was a 15 year-old girl, physically vulnerable. And she was quite frail, her body very delicate even for a small female. She was always getting bumped and bruised easily. It was why we had to 'break' Haruki with that elaborate plan, to stop him from always picking her up and tossing her around.

So she compensated with her mind. She needed to use her brain to survive. She had to be more alert, more aware of her surroundings, more watchful. She was always thinking ahead.

And all that mental excercise paid off. I bet she could kick my butt playing chess.

But all that was okay. I didn't mind. I had other advantages that complimented hers.

For starters, I saw things from a different perspective. A male perspective. And I gave her second pair of eyes, and being 28 years old I could give her an adult viewpoint on things. And my mind had a tendency to wonder a lot. I'd often daydream. I'd run long monologues in my head. This would help me reach insights that she would miss, simply because I would blissfully ruminate on them all day.

"You almost had it, Kyon."

I waited. I already conceded this round.

"The video game is a system. It has rules. Things operate inside it. It's a self contained system."

"It's basically a simulation."

"Yeah, it's a sim. So what happens when you turn the video game off?"

"It stops."

"Exactly! Reality instantly shifts to a higher level. You pop up a level. Get it?"

"No, I'm sorry."

She harumphed and dropped back into bed.

"Nevermind. I'm still not sure how to explain it anyway."

Haruhi bent over and adjusted Kyonko's pillow, then re-covered her with the blanket.

Kyonko closed her eyes. "Yuuki was just trying to reassure me. He's gone to a better place."

I touched her head. "Please try to get some sleep."

"He wanted me to be happy for him.. but still I'm kind of sad."

"Sleep."

* * *

It was morning. The starlings were singing their beautiful songs again.

I found Kyonko wide awake and sitting upright in bed. She seemed in fairly good spirits, even happy. She looked nothing like she did last night. I thought that was rather remarkable considering what had happened to her yesterday. I sat down again in the chair on the right side of the bed. Haruhi walked in with a food tray. She was busy ministering to her, waiting on her hand and foot, in her motherly way.

Kyonko began to eat breakfast in bed. She quickly devoured the leftovers from yesterday's aborted meal. She made a yummy sound. "Mmmm, Kyon, this is really good."

Haruhi said, "Don't eat so fast. Chew your food."

While Kyonko was eating I began to reflect.

Haruhi's mothering instincts first began to appear just over three years ago when we had the twins. It was a side of her that I had never seen before then. Looking back I remembered that I first saw it the first time she met Kyonko, when she was trying to comfort the girl. We didn't know it then but Haruhi was already pregnant.

The girl decapitated a taiyaki with her teeth and wolfed it down in about four bites. She seemed actually upbeat.

That poor girl. In many ways Kyonko was still just a child. And no child should have suffered what she had just gone through. Children can be resilient that way. They can bounce back from the worst tragedies.

Haruhi had cleaned her up from the night before. Her face was fresh and her ponytail was back. I continued to watch her in silence and she devoured her meal.

I took the opportunity to get a really good look at her.

She looked the same as the last time we met. That wasn't surprising, as time in her world moved differently. A few weeks had probably gone by.

She wasn't a conventionally pretty girl. She was a bit scrawny, with an angular chin, and had very little figure to speak of. When she wore her cardigan sweater her chest looked as flat as a washboard. Her forehead was a bit too large. She had very pretty eyes though. And the overall effect was kind of cute. The ponytail was especially cute, but then I'm biased that way. Taniguchi would probably rank her a B- or B.

No, wait. I squinted at her. Yes, she seemed.. different somehow. It was very subtle. I stared. I couldn't quite put my finger on it.

Dang it, she looks nice. On the Taniguchi scale she probably now ranked a B+ or better. Yes, there was a definite improvement.

I tried to figure out why. The bone structure of her face had changed. I could see very small alterations of her mouth and chin. And without her cardigan I could see that she actually had breasts now. There were other alterations to her body as well.

How the heck did that happen? Haruki would certainly have noticed.

Wait, Haruki. He was always obsessed with her. Of course. He did something. He.. changed her somehow. He must have done it unconsciously.

Back when Kyonko had kissed Haruki she told him they might fall in love someday. To him it was nothing but a dream, but no boy ever forgets something like that.

That was it. Haruki wanted her to look more beautiful, so now she was. He was unaware of his powers. He would never have changed her into a supermodel or anything like that. It wouldn't have been believable to him.

"Kyon, you're staring at me."

"Oh, sorry."

"Something is on your mind. Spill it."

"Wow, you look nice."

"Okaay.."

"Really, you do."

"What's with the weird flattery all of a sudden? I know you're not like that. Especially with me."

"You can't possibly know that about me."

That was because she literally doesn't know me. It was because in her mind I never existed in her universe.

Travel between universes carries a price. The price is the non-existence of yourself in the universe you just departed from. You never were, never are, and never will be.

Koizumi had explained it to me. It had something to do with quantum physics, something about the collapse of some probability wave function thing. He said that all actions require an observer. If an event is not observed it might as well never have happened. It doesn't actually 'happen' until it is observed. Then the event suddenly comes into existence. Huh?

He had this silly notion that the moment the effect is observed the actual event can actually travel _backward_ in time and then 'happen'. It was because the collapse of the wave function happened instantaneously, faster than the speed of light.

Could cause-and-effect be reversed that way? It made no sense to me. Einstein had resisted the idea too. He called it 'spooky action at a distance'. Hey, I respected Einstein. I respected him a helluva a lot more than I did Koizumi.

It was Koizumi's view that if a tree falls in the forest and nobody hears it, it literally does not make a sound. Or rather that the sound exists, but only if someone hears it. What?

The rule for inter-universe travel was that when a person departed from the old universe, any prior observations made of that person also disappear. It was because a person's record of events, his 'world line', can only exist in one universe at a time. It was a basic law of the multiverse. When the world line jumps to another universe the erasure of the line from the old universe happens immediately, and it happens across the entire timeline.

Secondary events can remain. This is because the record of any observations that are made by third parties who remain in that universe is left unchanged. Each observer is independent.

Here's an example. Suppose Kyonko and I are walking together over to Yuuki's apartment. I turn and say to Kyonko, "I hate broccoli." She later tells that to the male Asahina, _before I disappear_. After I disappear Kyonko will forget that I hated broccoli. But Asahina remembers. Asahina remembers because Kyonko had told it to him, not me. He could then re-inform Kyonko. So Kyonko then could know it again too.

In other words, the events would become 'unwound' one level back. I didn't understand why the unwinding of cause and effect didn't continue like a cascade. Koizumi had explained it but I wasn't listening, and frankly I didn't care.

Koizumi is such a boring bastard. He was always wasting my time explaining this physics stuff to me. I didn't see how any of it related to Organization business. It's not like the Organization could do anything about cosmological events anyway. He needs to keep his mind focused on his dang job, protecting Earth. The rest of the universe can take care of itself.

This stuff was Koizumi's all-consuming hobby. Come to think of it, that's probably what he does for recreation. I bet that geek just lays on the beach doing nothing but read advanced physics books.

Haruhi was waving her hands in front of my eyes.

"Kyon, snap out of it."

Oops.

Kyonko was trying to stifle a giggle.

"Wake up, you space cadet. Earth calling Kyon."

"Sorry Kyonko. Uh, what were you and I talking about again?"

"I said that I know you quite well."

"Oh that's right. Yuuki must have told you all about me."

"He certainly did. I spent many evenings in his apartment chatting about you, among other things. I think I drank enough tea to float away. He told me everything."

"Everything?"

"Everything."

Not everything. Yuuki would not have told her about the secret identity of her younger brother.

"You're avoiding my question, Kyon. Why did you make that odd remark about my looks?"

What could I say? Should I say anything? I should. She had a right to know.

"Your face has changed, your whole body. You aren't the same. I think Haruki unconsciously changed your looks."

"You think Haruki used his powers to make me look prettier?"

"Yeah."

"Doesn't it occur to you that there might be a much simpler explanation?"

I thought for a second. "I give up, spill."

"I'm going through puberty, silly. It's been six months since I last saw you."

D'oh! Girls her age change very rapidly.

"I feel like an idiot. Sorry."

"No, it's good you're thinking about this stuff. You pick up stuff I miss."

Back during the snowstorm she said exactly the same thing to me, word-for-word. Of course for her it was the first time.

Kyonko smiled at me. "Well, you know, Tsuruya was hitting on me a few days ago. It was the first time any boy paid any attention to me. I mean, except for Haruki of course. Tsuruya was so shy. It was sweet."

She stopped talking. Her eyes became soft. She looked into space. She closed and re-opened her hands.

"And now he's gone. They're all gone.."

As I was trying to find the right words to say, my cellphone rang. The caller ID indicated it was Asahina's emergency number.

Haruhi quickly removed the breakfast tray. She then turned and bent over and gave Kyonko a gentle hug and held it. "I know honey, it's ok.. it's ok. Just calm down."

My cell kept ringing. Asahina and I had a strict arrangement that all such calls must be taken in private.

"Excuse me, I need to take this call. Hey, everything will be ok, I promise. Let Haruhi baby you."

"Thank you, Kyon."

I left.

It was the most shocking phone call that I had ever received.


	3. Chapter 3: Two Boys Fight

**Chapter 3: Two Boys Fight**

I heard Asahina on my cell, "Kyon, time is unravelling."

Oh no. No no.

She continued. "Please meet me at 10 PM at the park bench, the one by the junior high school where we first met 16 years ago when Yuki had her breakdown."

"Got it. See you then."

I hadn't seen Mikuru Asahina since the last SOS Brigade reunion over four years ago. She was the 'big' Asahina, the beautiful grown woman who had guided my actions back on that fateful early pre-dawn morning of December 18, when I got stabbed by that psycho Asakura.

Asahina was originally born in the distant future. I had caught up with her in the timeline about six years ago. That meant that she was now six years older now than she was then.

I still did not know her real age. She told me it was still 'classified'. Why classified? Who cares? I bet she just didn't want to reveal it. A lot of women are like that. I can understand.

The time-travel agency was still really secretive. The Organization and the Data Integration Thought Entity shared a lot of information, and they often worked together. But the time-travel agency stayed apart. Their outfit always worked in secret.

I didn't understand the reason for the clandestine rigmarole. We lived in the same timeplane after all. Asahina could just knock on my front door and chat with me privately in my basement office anytime she wanted. I even knew her own office location: the old medical supply depot on Suragawa Street. So why couldn't I just meet her there?

I remembered she was rather upset when she discovered that I knew where her own office was located. I really didn't understand her agency's need for all this cloak-and-dagger stuff when dealing with me. It's not like a didn't know who and what she was. It all seemed so unnecessary.

Still, I looked forward to seeing Asahina. Even though she had aged a bit she was still really hot. Now please understand, I'm a married man now, and I wasn't really tempted. Haruhi kept me on a short leash. Not that I'd actually cheat on her, that was just how she was. And I was perfectly cool with that. I mean, if she caught me messing around it could be possible that the next morning I could find Cthulhu or some other eldritch terror running a tentacle up my backside. Not that she would ever actually do that to me. I think. Better not to tempt fate.

Just then the doorbell rang. It was Koizumi. I hadn't seen him in the flesh since Haruhi's baby shower.

His mask was on. Sigh.

"Hi! Kyon, it's me, Koizumi! It is so good to see you! May I please come in?"

He was wearing the plastic smile. What a lame act. "Yeah, whatever."

I was in a bad mood. I didn't feel like play-acting. I knew I was violating basic protocols. He'd ream me out later. I didn't care. What was he going to do? Fire me or something? That would be an improvement.

His smile got wider. "I heard that your darling sister has dropped by."

Yeah. And you didn't warn me you jerk.

He continued with his pleasant smile. "Is Kyonko here? May I see her?"

He let himself in without asking. He took off his shoes. He was carrying a box of chocolates.

"You know darn well she's here."

He stayed in character. "Wonderful! Is there anything I can do to cheer her up? She's probably in the bedroom I would imagine."

Before I could stop him he was heading into our master bedroom.

I knew exactly why he was here. He just wanted to harass and interrogate Kyonko to feed his stupid obsession about cosmology.

"Koizumi, this problem is outside of the Organization's jurisdiction. Get lost." I was violating the rules, but I didn't care.

Little Ayu ran up to me. "Daddy, can you come play Uno with us?" I picked her up. She had me distracted. Koizumi took the opportunity to get past me.

"No pumpkin, not now. Daddy's busy, ok?" I spotted him going into the bedroom.

I was already planning to escort Kyonko to see Nagato later this evening, before my rendezvous with Asahina. After all, Kyonko was the sole surviving witness of some great multiverse disaster. And yeah it's a big problem. Bigger than anyone can imagine. I wasn't ignoring it at all. It was just that this particular crisis went way beyond Earth. This was a job for the Data Integration Thought Entity, not the Organization. According to Asahina there was also a time problem, so of course I'd coordinate with her. And if either Nagato or Asahina wanted the Organization to help of course I'd make it happen.

But Koizumi was just butting in. He was trying to feed his own personal obsessions. It was an abuse of his Organization authority. He was violating the rules too.

Kyonko had just gone through a terrible ordeal. I started to think about ways to get rid of him without making a scene.

Ayu insisted on slowly enumerating a long list of presents that she wanted for Christmas. It took a couple of minutes before I was able to finally disengage from her. I kissed her and put her down, then trotted to the master bedroom.

Koizumi was sitting in my chair to the right of the bed. The box of chocolates was already open. Kyonko was munching on a bon mot.

I pulled up the second chair and sat next to him.

{ Kyon: Give it a rest, will ya? The girl is still exhausted. Leave her alone. }

I waited for his inevitable retort to buzz in my left ear. He would transmit something testy, like 'Shut up, Kyon. I'm busy here.'

Instead he sent me something entirely different. He gave me a sideways glance. He looked apologetic.

{ Koizumi: I'm very sorry. I admit this isn't strictly Organization business. }

Dang right, you obsessive twit. Get out of here.

{ Koizumi: Kyon, it was Nagato. She asked me to come here and talk to her. }

Oh. That was different.

{ Kyon: Sorry. Carry on. }

What I didn't know was that at that moment Kyonko was looking at us really closely, her gleaming dark eyes were sweeping back and forth. She had that hawk look on her face. It was the same expression she had when Haruhi and I first met her.

"You two are communicating with each other somehow, aren't you? I just saw it play on your faces."

Koizumi's smile was a frozen rictus.

{ Koizumi: Dang it Kyon, you got us busted. }

{ Kyon: Me? You're the one who gave us away you idiot. }

{ Koizumi: Me? Why you.. }

"You two stop it. Play nice."

She then turned towards me. "Kyon, I can understand why Koizumi wears a wire. It's part of his job. But you? Why?"

The frozen smile on Koizumi's face started to crack.

I sighed and tried to think of how to explain it to her without hurting her feelings.

She made a frown. "Kyon, please, tell me. Why are you spying on me? You know very well we want our private conversations to remain private. Why would you let him use you as a spy?"

I held her hand. "Hey, you know I never would do that to you. It's not a spy device. Usually I forget the transceiver is even there. Koizumi simply gave it to me so I can communicate with the Organization."

I glanced over at Koizumi. He was completely frozen. I went on. "It's just a way so we can talk during an emergency. It's not a spy device, really. Honest. I'm sorry. I should have told you."

"Is that what Koizumi told you? It's just a communication device?"

"Uh, yeah."

"And you believed him?"

The crack in Koizumi's smile grew. I saw a bead of sweat on his brow.

She folded her arms and gave me the Kyon-is-an-idiot look.

"Kyon, isn't it obvious? He's been spying. Spying on _you_. He's been spying on everything you have said or heard during the last four years."

Oh my god. Was Kyonko right?

Wait, everything? Haruhi was really wild in bed. Sometimes in bed she'd whoop like she was the star attraction in some rodeo show. "Ride'em cowboy!"

Oh no.. Oh yes.. Arrrgh!

"Dang it, Koizumi! You putz!"

His smile completely cracked in half.

I scrabbled at both my ears with my fingers. I'll have to ask Haruhi to rip them out for me and bandage it. After all our years of adventures she has gotten pretty good at first aid, if only out of necessity.

I jumped out of the chair. "I quit!"

Koizumi dropped his act and glared at me.

"You just violated Article 1 protocols. She's a Person of Interest, a P.O.I. You know what you just did? According to the manual I'm supposed to terminate you with extreme prejudice. With a cyanide needle. Right now."

"Just try it. You want to take this outside?"

Kyonko bounced on the bed. "You two stop it!"

We both looked at her sheepishly.

I dropped my head. "I'm sorry. Nagato had asked him to come here. She just wants to know what happened."

Koizumi finished wiping his brow and nodded in agreement.

Kyonko unfolded her arms. "Ok, that's better. I knew she was going to debrief me sooner or later. Might as well be now. I'll tell you what happened."

And so she did.


	4. Chapter 4: The Key Observation

**A/N:**

This story is part of a series. The opening story is _The Realization of Haruki Suzumiya._ For the link click on my handle (HuuskerDu). To best enjoy this sequel please read that story first.

The final story is _The Memories of Haruki Suzumiya_. Read that story last.

* * *

**Chapter 4: The Key Observation**

Kyonko told us everything she knew. Unfortunately it wasn't much.

Apparently the SOS Brigade was sitting in the brigade room. It was late afternoon during the spring. It was still their first year. Haruki was busy working the computer. Asahina was serving tea in his butler uniform. Kyonko was busy destroying Koizumi at chess.

"I was sitting there, spacing out a bit. I was dividing my attention between the game and watching Haruki. His eyes seemed rather intense, like he was searching for something using the computer. I couldn't see the screen.

"He seemed frustrated, like he couldn't find what he was looking for. He kept looking at me, then looking at the screen. He wasn't happy.

"I think he was trying to find information about you, Kyon. He thought you were my older brother."

I nodded. "I remember that he saw me open the door into the brigade room. We even talked. So he knew I wasn't just a figment of his imagination. I was a real person."

"Yes. And I think he wasn't having much success finding you on the Internet. I think he was getting frustrated."

Kyonko sat up more. "Then he turned off the computer, crossed his arms, and just sat in that chair for a while."

"And then?"

"That was it. He just told us to go home. So we did."

"That's all?"

"That's all. I went home."

I sighed. This wasn't much help.

Koizumi spoke up. "Kyonko, did anything else happen? Anything unusual, no matter how minor? It might be important."

"Not really. I just went home. Well, there was just one thing. I did remember that I didn't see my little brother before bedtime. That was a bit odd, as he usually tries to run into my bedroom and bug me before I can get to sleep. But he that night he didn't do that. I never saw him. But I don't see how that is relevant really."

Koizumi shrugged. "At this stage anything might be important."

I ignored Koizumi and looked at Kyonko. "Please go on."

"That was it. I went to sleep."

"And the next day?"

"The next day I ate breakfast, put on my uniform, and walked out the door to school as usual. Hmm, I didn't see my brother then either now that I think about it. That wasn't that unusual though. He didn't bug in the me the morning as often as he did in the evening.

"I walked about 30 paces. Then I was suddenly falling."

"Falling?"

"I was literally falling. Everything was white. I screamed. My memory is kind of hazy after that. It was like I was tumbling through an endless space. I don't know for how long. I lost my sense of time. It could have been minutes or hours or days. I don't know. Then I saw a figure of a large man standing in front of me, only in shadow. It could have been Yuuki or Haruki, I'm not sure. I saw the shadow literally dissolve in front of my eyes. I don't know what I was seeing really. I think I screamed again."

"Then the next thing I knew I was laying on your front lawn. That's it."

Koizumi frowned. "That's it?"

"That's it."

"Nothing else?"

"I'm sorry."

I interjected, "Koizumi, stop it. She said that's it."

After that Koizumi said his goodbyes and left. To his credit, Koizumi apologized to both of us before leaving.

It was time for me to take Kyonko to see Yuki.

"You think you are up for a walk?"

"Sure. The weather is lovely. I love watching sunsets."

We walked together in silence to Nagato's singles-only apartment. I thought about her story. Something about it seemed to nag at me.. it was an image. An image that I had seen before in my imagination. Kyonko's tale about the dissolving man. Did I dream that? I think I did. I had thought I was just having bad dreams because I was hitting the fridge late at night. Was it coincidence? Somehow I didn't think so.

We walked togther into the red setting sun.

* * *

Later that evening Kyonko and I were standing in Yuki Nagato's apartment. Nagato had served us tea. The full teacups remained untouched.

It was because we were no longer sitting at the table. The three of us were standing and having a heated three-way argument.

That is, one of us was having a heated argument, while the other two were calm and collected.

The tea was getting cold. Somehow we got into some kind of stupid philosophical discussion.. an ontological and epistemological argument about the nature of reality and information. It started after Nagato had announced that the Data Integration Thought Entity had a theory about how the multiverse disaster happened.

Nagato tried to explain the Entity's theory, but Kyonko would have none of it. Everything went downhill from there. Me? I mainly watched. The argument had been going on for awhile.

It was a pity Koizumi wasn't here. They were having a philosophical argument about the nature of reality and the cosmos. Oh man, he would have absolutely loved it.

I sided with my sister. I told Nagato that her theory was crazy.

Yuki continued to speak in her soft monotone. "It is true, Kyon, we are inside."

I was incredulous. "It doesn't make sense! It's ridiculous!"

Kyonko was standing with her arms crossed. The three of us were facing off, standing at the three vertices of an equilateral triangle. Kyonko was thinking hard. "You know, I change my mind. I think maybe Nagato might be right after all. I think she just means that we are living inside a closed system with rules. That's why she said the word 'simulation'. To her everything is data."

Yuki nodded. "Yes."

Great. They were now ganging up on me, two-to-one. I gamely fought on. "That's nuts. We are not living inside a simulation!"

Kyonko looked at me. "No, I think I understand her point now. Think about it. Her point is about observation. That observation is the key to everything."

For Yuki that was certainly true. That was her job after all, to be the observer of my wife. She apparently believed that everything must be observed or it might as well not exist. A music phonograph without a record player is just a hunk of plastic.

"Kyon, I think I see Nagato's point now. It is only when the phonograph is being played that it becomes music. The music exists only during that time. Yes, I think I understand it."

Her eyes became fierce. I flapped my arms. I knew I wasn't going to win this.

"Oh, it's so simple! Don't you see? She's right. Think about it. The music itself cannot be stored. The phonograph is just a piece of plastic with squiggles on it. It's not music then. Every song must be played to be heard. Otherwise it's just a series of notes. Raw uninterpreted data. It's just bits."

"Okay.."

"And for the music to be heard it requires a listener. That's what she means."

Yuki said, "Yes."

"And that's why she says everything that is real is running in a sim."

"Yes."

I sighed again. "C'mon, you can't be serious. That all of reality is a sim?"

"Kyon, think about how music is played. It works the same way for us too. There is always something like that that is 'playing' us, running our sim. Three things are always required: The phonograph, the record player, and the listener who listens to it."

I nodded like I pretended to understand. I just waited for her to continue.

"Now, we don't know who or what the listener is exactly. The listener is operating at a higher level, higher than us."

"You mean that for all we know we could all just be characters inside some novel or some fan fic? That the universe could be just a simulation that is running inside the head of the author?"

"Exactly, we just don't know."

"So for all we know we could all be living inside _The Matrix_. That's nuts."

"It's still valid. There is no way for us to know. The important thing is that the simulation, or the universe, or whatever you want to call it, is being run by somebody." She looked up. "But I think there's something more. Nagato is trying to make an important point here. Don't you see it?"

Yuki didn't wait for me to respond. She said, "Observation is the key."

"That's her point. Kyon, don't you see what she's getting at? According to quantum mechanics, a physical event doesn't actually 'happen' until it is observed. At that moment the probability wave function collapses, faster than the speed of light, and the event suddenly comes into existence. So if a tree falls in the forest and no one hears it, it literally doesn't make a sound. Or rather, the sound doesn't exist until someone hears it. That's the key."

She went on. "But there is more. Music requires three things: the record with the squiggles, the record player to play the notes as song, and someone to listen to the song. _If no one is listening then it is not music._ That is what she means by a sim. A sim implies something higher. The record player plays. But somebody has to hear it for it to mean anything. If there is no one to listen to the record player it merely oscillates the air molecules. With no mind to interpret it, to hear the song, there is no music."

Poor girl. She obviously has gone around the bend. I stared at her.

Then I finally said, "Ok smarty, the person listening to that music, where is that person in reality?"

"In a higher sim."

"Then what's running _that_ sim?"

"Something higher."

"What?"

"Ay, there's the rub, isn't it?"

"You're crazy."

Yuki said, "She is correct. That is the very essence of the Data Integration Thought Entity."

"What?"

Yuki came closer to me. "Kyon, the Data Integration Thought Entity _is_ the universe. It is the universe observing itself."

I gave up. "Yuki, you're pulling my leg. I know this kind of humor is right up your alley, but just stop."

I knew Yuki's secret sense of humor. I had seen it during our private time together, when we talked away during the night. She would sometimes play all sorts of silly mind games with me. It was her playful side that no one else ever saw. This sounded exactly like the kind of stuff she whispered in my ear back then, her silly Zen koans, those riddles, just to mess with me. She always came clean later though.

"No, Kyon. This is not humor. I admit that during our private time together that I had said some things to you as a form of.. personal humor. This is not such a time. I am not using humor. Truly, the Data Integration Thought Entity is the universe. It is more accurate to say it is the self-aware state of the universe."

"Really? You're serious."

Yuki took a step towards me.

"Yes, Kyon. It should be obvious to you. The very name of the Data Integration Thought Entity states this fact. It is not a secret. It is data. It is integrated. It is thought. It is an entity. It is the Data Integration Thought Entity."

I had always wondered why that name was so long and unwieldy. "Ok, fine. So the Entity is self-aware. That's fine. And that means.. what exactly? Wait, c'mon. You're going to quote that French philosopher, René Descartes, was it? He said 'I think, therefore I am.'"

"Kyon, it is true. Your mind thinks. You are self aware. Therefore you should exist. But existence requires something more. Otherwise existence is not actualized, it is not real."

Kyonko's eyes were on fire. "Kyon, _if there is no listener then it is not music_."

"Yes. Observation is the key. Observation is everything. I am the observer of Haruhi Suzumiya. It is the most fulfilling duty that I could possibly have."

Yuki took a step towards me. "Kyon, the Data Integration Thought Entity is not the observer. It is higher. Do you see it now?"

I had a dawning realization. Kyonko was beaming at me. "Look at his face. See? He's figuring it out."

I had an epiphany.

"You mean.. wait.. that means.."

"Yes. You have discovered the key: To exist you must first be _observed_."

I had suddenly understood a deep truth.

I looked at them both. "So.. so something must exist that is higher than me. Higher. Observing. Watching me.

My mind reeled.

"Yes. This is what you call God. God is watching you."

"So God exists then."

"Of course. Is it not obvious?"

I stared at Yuki. She was absolutely serious.

Kyonko clapped her hands. "Very good, Kyon!"

They're both serious.. Wait..

Then something odd happened. I began to feel a sense of euphoria. Of unreality. It was as if I was seeing myself outside of my own body.

Wow. It was just, wow. "So then, Madalyn Murray O'Hair was an idiot?"

Kyonko put her hands back in her pockets. "Atheism is a such a silly philosophy. To know for certain that there is no God. It's bad reasoning."

Heh. I wanted to grab a phone and call up that atheist Richard Dawkins and laugh at him like that kid Nelson Muntz on _The Simpsons_ TV show: Har Har!

Actually that last thought was pretty childish of me. I guess it was because I was feeling pretty buzzed.

I should stop at this point and make something clear. Please understand, that when Yuki she said 'God' she did not mean my wife. She created our world only 16 years ago. Basically our universe was her own private playground, a private sim.

Ok then, so what had given Haruhi and Haruki each their own private sim?

Something higher.

_Higher and higher and higher_

In my head I thought I heard a lyric from a song. It distracted me.

Meanwhile, Yuki was nodding to Kyonko. "Yes. There is always a higher system. Your mathematician Kurt Gödel proved it rigorously in 1931. The mathematics are irrefutable."

I'd have to take her word on that. I was never good at math.

Kyonko was jumping up and down. "Yes! There is always a higher reality, one that we cannot reach from here on our own. One where it is literally impossible for us to go up and see for ourselves."

It all made sense. And observation was everything. Observation. Something was looking down at us from a higher level.

It all made sense.

Then Yuki walked right up to me and whispered in my ear, "There is more, but it is a secret. The hypothesis. About the continuum. The Data Integration Thought Entity believes it to be true, but a rival data entity does not. Because of the disagreement they have become enemies. There is a great debate going on between them right now, and the debate spans the heavens itself. And there are similar debates about higher mathematical concepts, going on between even greater data entities in higher levels of reality, even deadly combat. It now spans across all of transfinity itself. I am beginning to feel something, an emotion. I think it is giddiness. I wish you to analyze my thoughts and feelings as you once did with me, in private."

Kyonko crossed her arms and started tapping with her foot, "Uhm, Nagato, can you please stop flirting with my brother? Didn't you call us down here for some reason other than for you to restart your silly head games with him?"

Yuki stepped away. "I apologize. I should not have done that with him. It was inappropriate."

I said, "Yuki, it's ok. I don't mind. Heh, it's like old times, isn't it? I know you must be feeling really excited or you wouldn't have done that. Don't worry. Just tell us what we need to know."

"Thank you. I am slightly unstable at the moment, but I do not believe it to be serious."

"It's ok. Really, everything's fine. Yuki, just calm down. Now, just tell me and Kyonko why you brought us here. Then you and I can, uh, chat later in private if you like."

Kyonko was getting exasperated, "Kyon! You are a married man now. Both of you just stop it! Or else I'm going to throw a bucket of water on you both!"

I felt chagrined, "Uh, yeah, she's right. Yuki, can you re-stabiize by yourself? I think that's probably best. But if you can't settle down, I _will_ volunteer to stay with you."

The Humanoid Interface said, "No, that is not necessary. Thank you. I am stable now."

Kyonko flapped her arms, "Sheesh, we gotta find a better way to keep Nagato on the rails."

Yuki silently registered her opinion of that statement. Then she turned to face both of us, "Let us return to business. The reason I had summoned the both of you here is that Data Integration Thought Entity believes it knows the cause of the destruction of the multiverse. It believes it knows the reason why all of the alternate realities were all destroyed."

"That's great, Yuki! What is the reason?"

"Observation."

"Huh?"

"It is observation. Observation is the key."

I waved my hand to indicate that I needed more of a clue.

Yuki held my hand. "Kyon, I have already explained. Observation is everything. I am the observer of Haruhi Suzumiya."

That part I understood, but not what followed from it. "So is observation causing the multiverse to go ka-blooey somehow? I still don't get it."

Yuki tightened the grip on my hand. She had not touched me like this in 12 years. "The Data Integration Thought Entity believes that observation is the root cause of the multiverse crisis. It is why the alternate realities are all being destroyed. The quantum probability wave function is collapsing across the multiverse."

Kyonko's froze. She stared. "The wave function.. collapsing.. all the alternate realities.. you mean.."

"Yes. Someone tried to observe. Someone tried to observe from one reality to another. It is not allowed. Observation from a higher level is allowed, but not from within the system."

Kyonko frowned. "Ugh. That's bad. To observe anything between two universes in the same system would violate some pretty fundamental laws, right?"

"Yes. A person's world line must never be allowed to exist in two realities at the same time. Someone violated this fundamental rule. Someone observed, and all the alternate realities were destroyed."

"So the wave function collapsed, then. And so one only reality remained, this one."

"Yes. The Data Integration Thought Entity believes this is what happened."

Kyonko folded her arms across her cardigan. "Observation. Hmm. You're right. That's the whole problem. Some person living in universe A must have tried to observe something in universe B."

Yuki nodded. "Yes."

I was trying gamely to keep up. "So what you two are saying is.. somebody tried to violate the basic rule of the multiverse.. and it collapsed all the alternate realities?"

"Yes."

Kyonko's shoulders slumped. "So that's it then. Some fool tried to peek. He tried to peek into Schrödinger's box, and the cat died. All the cats died."

I held my hands out, "Schrödinger's cat? You lost me again. Can you two please put me back on the clue train?"

'Schrödinger's cat. It is both alive and dead until somebody peeks into the box. Somebody peeked. So the cat died."

"What?"

Kyonko did a facepalm.

"Ugh. I know what happened. Nevermind, Kyon. I'll explain it to you later."

"Wait, explain it now.. I want to understand this. Some somebody tried to peek from one universe to another."

"Yes."

"Some reckless idiot."

"Yes."

I had a dawning realization..

Oh no.

Kyonko kept her hand on her face. "Someone attempted cross-universe observation. It's not allowed. Only one reality can be observed by any observer at a time."

Her facepalm continued. "Someone wanted to peek into another universe. Someone who had incredible power."

Sigh. I was getting it now.

"Kyon, he was obsessed about sliders. I think what happened is that he figured out that you're not really my brother. He must have decided that you were a slider."

"I was, basically."

"Yeah. He somehow suspected your true identity, that you were my gender opposite clone, that you were a slider from another universe."

"He was right. I was."

I did an identical facepalm to Kyonko's. The two of us were like a stereo picture. I peeked at Kyonko between my fingers.

"And he was always obsessed about you."

"Yes."

"So he got obsessed about me too."

"Yes."

"And was curious."

"Yes."

"About me."

"Yes."

"He wanted to see me."

"Yes."

"He wanted to take a peek."

"Yes."

"And everything went ka-blooey."

"Yes. It was his final act."

It was Haruki.

I sputtered. "That.. that.. stupid.. colossal.."

"Don't be so hard on him, Kyon. He was just curious. He didn't know. He must have done it unconsciously. He doesn't control his powers."

She finally removed her hand from her face. "But I think at the last instant he did realize his mistake somehow. In that final moment he saved me. He catapulted me into the final collapsed quantum state, this universe. This is the only universe that survived. It was his final act before he died. He couldn't, or wouldn't, save himself. He saved me instead."

I stamped my feet up and down. I jumped and yelled. I shook my fists up at the heavens.

"Arrghhh!"

"Kyon, he didn't know."

It didn't matter. That fool had made the biggest blunder of all time. The biggest mistake in all of history. In all of every history. In all of any possible histories.

I screamed at the ceiling. "Haruki, you big.. fat.. IDIOT!"

"I'm sorry, Kyon. I'm stuck here. I don't think I'm ever going home."


	5. Chapter 5: Asahina Makes Contact

**A/N:**

This story is part of a series. The opening story is _The Realization of Haruki Suzumiya._ For the link click on my handle (HuuskerDu). To best enjoy this sequel please read that story first.

The final story is _The Memories of Haruki Suzumiya_. Read that story last.

If this fic is too heavy for you, I have written a lighter, breezier and more humorous fic that covers much the same ground emotionally and intuitively, and it requires no college education. It is written in the style of Terry Pratchett's _Discworld_ novels. The fic is called _The Fifth Kind of Love._ The story is based on the _Ah! My Goddess!_ animes and the_ Oh! My Goddess!_ mangas. You can find _The Fifth Kind of Love_ by clicking on my handle (HuuskerDu).

* * *

**Chapter 5: Asahina Makes Contact**

I escorted Kyonko back home. It was after 10 PM. I was late for my rendezvous with Asahina. I left Kyonko in the care of Haruhi, then trotted towards the park bench for the meeting. The car was still in the shop so there was no way to get there any faster.

I huffed. All this running around was actually pretty good exercise for me. And lately I was hitting the gym. I was sure that Haruhi would be thrilled to know how much extra excercise I was getting. I was in much better physical shape now than I was four years ago. The slightly buldging gut that I had back then was gone. I did a slow trot towards the junior high.

The junior high was still there, and North High was still around too. I began to think about Kyonko's future.

Kyonko was right, she would be stuck in this world for the rest of her life. I knew I would have to contact the Organization to try to arrange for her to get a new identity.

Hmm, what should her identity be? I worked out a cover story: She is my younger sister. Our parents could no longer take care of her so she was going to move in and live with her older adult brother's family, at least until she could graduate from high school and go to college. The cover story had the benefit of being mostly true. We would have to enroll her in North High. Hmm, we would have to juggle bedrooms a bit. Ayu and Katai were in separate bedrooms, so we might have to combine them again for a while. I wasn't sure but Haruhi and I would figure something out. A fifteen year-old girl needs her own bedroom. Back when I was living with my own parents I sure needed one.

Wait, was she still fifteen or was she sixteen now? It was six months since our last meeting. When was her birthday anyway?

Duh, it was the same date as mine. So her sweet-sixteen would be in.. about a month and a half. Haruhi and I would have to arrange something to make it very special for her.

And then.. what?

I frowned. What was Kyonko going to do? What was she doing to do with the rest of her life? I knew that Kyonko was destined to be Haruki's future mate. The first time we met she had denied it vehemently with every fiber of her being. This was back when Haruki was unwittingly physically abusing her.

He didn't know that of course. I fixed that problem. After that incident four years ago he promised he would never hurt her that way again. And he kept his promise. He never picked her up or tossed her around ever again.

He was still the bombastic SOS Brigade Leader of course. And he still dressed her up in bunny suits and those other silly costumes. She didn't really mind. And in class he'd still sometimes pull her ponytail gently to get her attention. In my mind's eye I could see her sitting in class in front of Haruki's desk. Haruki would try to talk to her. She'd ignore him. Then he'd gently pull her ponytail backwards so she'd end up with the back of her head on his desk, face up. Haruki would then bend over her and breathlessly tell her about his latest crazy scheme to find aliens or whatever. In my mind it was a funny picture. But the clear understanding between them was always that if Kyonko said 'stop', he would stop immediately. To his credit he always did.

Their relationship grew. They were starting to get along. Oh, it was still a very rocky road, just like my relationship with Haruhi back then. Haruki would exasperate Kyonko daily. She would probably do at least a half-dozen facepalms or eyerolls every day. And her mouth could get really sassy. I was snarky, she was sassy.

I knew that they were supposed to fall in love someday. Haruki had chosen her, unconsciously, for them to come together. I knew it would happen because the same thing happened to me and Haruhi. Kyonko grudgingly admitted the possibility, though she was still pretty incredulous about the whole thing. I told her I knew it would work out. They meshed. Their personalities complemented each other. It was going to be a beautiful and deep relationship, just like mine was with Haruhi.

But wait.. no. Haruki is dead now. Worse than dead. His universe was literally gone. That meant he never existed. He never was, never is, and never will be.

I felt melancholy. Kyonko's old life was literally gone. She was alone. What would she do now? I didn't want to think about it. Girls her age can get really depressed. In the future I would have to watch her carefully for the signs: moodiness, insomnia, weight gain, social withdrawal. Right then she seemed really chipper. I think it was because she really enjoyed palling around with me. Her strong mind was fully engaged with solving the puzzle of what happened to her and why.

But all that would end soon. We now knew what happened. It was over.

It was all over.

I finally made it to the park bench around 11 PM. I was an hour late for my meeting with Asahina. The area was deserted. A forlorn street lamp shined over the park bench. I re-checked the area. Nobody was around. I turned to leave. I'd have to call her tomorrow and apologize.

"Kyon!"

A woman walked out of the shadows. It was Asahina.

"Hello, Kyon."

"I'm sorry Asahina, I didn't mean to keep you waiting."

"Oh that's okay. I knew you'd be late. I just got here."

"How did you know? Oh, nevermind."

She's a time traveller. Duh.

She looked much the same as the last time I met her at this park bench 16 years ago. She was wearing the same form-fitting white blouse with the two top buttons open above her ample bosom. She was still stunningly attractive. I did notice the smallest hint of crow's feet around her eyes. And her facial expressions seemed a bit.. constrained. Like her face was botoxed. How old was she anyway? Well, it wasn't really important.

"Kyon, you look very nice. I can see that you've been working out recently. How is Haruhi and the family?"

"Oh, just fine. How's yours?"

"That's classified."

We exchanged further pleasantries in a similar fashion for a couple minutes. She said the world "classified" a half dozen more times. Then she came to the point:

"Kyon, time is unravelling. We don't know why. I contacted Koizumi and he told me to talk to you about it."

I sighed. "Asahina, I have some good news and some bad news. The good news is that Kyonko and I know exactly what happened. The bad news is that there is nothing you can do about it."

I explained what Haruki had done, how had he collapsed all the alternate realities with his foolish act.

"Oh dear, that is very bad."

"Yes it is. I'm guessing that it is somehow is interfering with your time travel capabilities."

"Kyon, I think you are probably right. We have lost access to many of the timeplanes. We can still access new timeplanes that we have never visited before, but we cannot go back to many of the ones that we had visited previously."

That made sense. Thanks to the discussion I had with Yuki earlier that evening I knew how time travel worked. It worked by creating alternate realities. For example, let's say that I wrote down the winning lottery number today, on Friday. Then I went back in time to the previous Monday and bought the winning lottery ticket. The act would create two realities: one where I won the lottery on Friday and one where I didn't. Time would then roll forward from there, in two different realities. Two different universes, one the alternate and one the original.

Of course that was just semantics. My 'primary' reality could be your alternative reality; you could insist that your reality was the primary one, not mine. It was a distinction without a difference.

There was one important exception: If you receive foreknowledge of an event in your _own_ future, that is, of something in your own timeline that has not happened yet in your own personal experience, you cannot change that event. For example if you learn that you will die on a certain date, then that event will always happen. You will definitely die on that day. It became inevitable.

For everything else, for everything other than for that one exception, time travel created alternate realities. But thanks to Haruki those alternate realities were now all gone. Everything was cut off. New timeplanes could be accessed by new time travel that took place after the Great Ending, but not before.

Then something odd happened. She looked down like she was thinking. She mumbled something. Then she made a small nod of her head and looked back up at me.

Dang it.. she was wearing a transceiver! It was probably just like the two transceivers that the female Koizumi had inserted behind my ears four years ago back on Kyonko's world. I could feel the bandages behind my ears where Haruhi had cut them out.

"Asahina, who is that talking in your ear?"

She looked a bit startled. "Uh, nobody. I'm just talking to myself. I do that sometimes."

"I don't believe you."

She sighed. "Ok, you caught me." She then pulled out some kind of weird smartphone and looked at a calendar on it. "Let's see.. ok, the schedule indicates I'm allowed to tell you now."

"Ok, well?"

"Like I said, I was talking to myself."

"C'mon." The lie was transparent, and rather stupid I thought.

"It is true, Kyon. It is myself from the future. She is advising me what to say to you."

She's a time traveller. Duh. I must be getting tired.

"Oh, sorry.. Carry on."

"So let me see if I understand what you have told me. Basically, Haruki tried to peek at our universe. That act collapsed all the alternate realities, including his own. Do I have that right? Just that one event caused all the trouble? Just that?"

"As far as I know, yes."

"So if we can somehow just undo that one particular event, his one final act, it would fix everything, right?"

I thought about that. My mind ran over the three-way argument that happened earlier this evening at the apartment between Kyonko, Yuki, and myself.

"No, I don't think you can fix this, sorry. This is something that goes beyond time travel. You can't just go back in time and change it. That timeplane no longer exists. It never existed. It's gone. There is nothing you can go back to."

She nodded, then she listened to her transceiver. Then she smiled.

"Not necessarily.."

"What are you driving at?"

She listened to her transceiver again. Then she checked the calendar again on her smartphone.

"Ok, I'm allowed to tell you now."

"Tell me what?"

"There are different methods of time travel."

Of course. I remember now. There _are_ different methods of time travel. Nagato had told me that herself. She told me that back when Asahina and I were in her apartment three years prior to that awful world-changing December 18 event. Asahina lost her TPDD somehow and we were trapped in the wrong timeplane.

Nagato told me that she could travel in time whenever she wanted, that it would be simple for her, much easier than Asahina's method. Yuki had never time-travelled herself, though, and I had forgotten the reason why.

But I understood Yuki's method of time travel. She could just inject herself, her data, into the system, into the sim, of her target destination. The act would split and create a new reality, a second alternate universe, at that point in the spacetime continuum.

And of course there was a third way of time travel. Einstein was the first one to figure if out. If you move near the speed of light, time slows down. And it could slow down dramatically. An astronaut flying in a near-FTL spacecraft could travel all the way to the Andromeda galaxy in a few subjective years. It would take at least two and a half million years to reach galaxy M31, but he could still reach it within a single human lifetime. It was a one-way trip, however. There was no going back. The astronaut could never return and see his family again. He probably couldn't even find any of the human race left on Earth. They would have moved on.

Asahina's time travel method was different. I knew that her time travel method used something called a Temporal Plane Destruction Device, or TPDD.

"We use confidential means, higher protocols. It's all classified. The protocols are ones that even the Data Integrated Thought Entity does not know about."

I nodded. I knew that the time-travel agency was really secretive. Even paranoid.

"Ok, so what's your method?"

"It is simple, Kyon."

"Yes?"

"We contact a Higher Power."

Wait, what?

Oh that's great, just dandy. Asahina just dropped another crazy religious bombshell on me. Just like when Yuki told me with a straight face that God existed. Or like Yuuki did when he told Kyonko he was going to Heaven.

"Pull my other leg."

"It is true, Kyon. That is how our time travel works."

Oh man, she's serious.

They are all nuts. All my old Brigade friends are nuts.

I couldn't believe what I said next.

"You mean.. uh, you uh, contact God?"

"Oh no, Kyon. That would be silly."

Phew. That was a relief.

"I still don't understand."

"As I said, we contact a Higher Power. But we go only up one level. Only one level higher than our own."

"One higher level of reality."

"Yes."

"I see."

I didn't.

I went on. "So, you think you can fix this problem by contacting your.. Higher Power."

"I am not sure yet. I will have to check."

She went on to explain. "The Higher Power has given us a method for this purpose. We can never contact the Higher Power on our own. Go up a level, I mean. One can never go up. One can only go down. The Higher Power has given us a method to contact it."

He smartphone buzzed. "Excuse me, I need to take this phone call in private. I'm sorry, can you wait?"

"Sure."

She moved away and started to talk into her smartphone. I couldn't hear her.

I waited. Meanwhile my mind began to wander.

So the time-travel agency has some kind of special secret method, something given to them by a Higher Power, to contact it. I wondered what the method was. Was it that phone? Was it that simple?

I continued to wait. I let my mind drift. Contacting higher levels of reality.. I suppose that could be really useful. I continued to think about how Asahina did it. It must be that smartphone. The smartphone must be the TPDD. I bet she was talking upstairs right now to her Higher Power.

Wait, didn't she tell me once that it was something embedded inside her head? I then remembered that the young Asahina had lost her TPDD back when I drew those Nazca lines on the field at the junior high for the 12-year old Haruhi. And I remembered that the older Asahina had told me that she had it embedded into her head. For safety probably. Aha! The transceiver! Of course. Maybe it doubled as the TPDD. Or maybe the TPDD was a separate device. At any rate regardless of wheverever it was hidden I already knew the answer. It was the TPDD, or something like it, that was her communication link to the Higher Power.

It probably wasn't her smartphone then. That would be too obvious. And it would have been too dangerous if the phone fell into the wrong hands. Ok, then who was she talking to right now? It must be somebody else. I knew she was not talking to herself. She would use the transceiver for that. And she wasn't talking to her Higher Power. That was a hidden method. Ok then, so who was she talking to now? She didn't want me to know.

Think, Kyon, think. She wasn't talking to her superiors nor to her Higher Power.. so who was it? It had to be somebody else, somebody not in the time-agency. An outsider. Who could it be?

Oh, wait..

I did a facepalm. Of course. I bet she's talking to.. yes.. to _me. _In the future. She's checking something. She wants my permission for something. That must be it.

Apparently Asahina had several communication methods. Some were hidden, some not. That made sense. A time-traveller would need backup methods to contact her counterparts on the other timeplanes. If she got caught or captured, or if someone had stripped her of all her belongings, she still needed an emergency method to call for help.

So she had a backchannel to contact a Higher Power. However it worked, it must be very secret. It had to be embedded in her head. Wow, that was really useful. I wish I had that.

I bet every higher power had something like that. They all probably had some kind of backdoor, some kind of information backchannel for communication from the lower reality to the higher reality.

And what about higher levels? They must have secret communication methods too.

And how about the highest level? The biggest guy of them all, God? What kind of information backdoor did the Big Guy have, anyway? I suddenly had a notion to ask Yuki a question about it. But I knew I wouldn't get a straight answer from her. She would just drone on with some technobabble for about 10 minutes regarding mathematics and ontological philosophy or some epistemological theory, and it would all soar right over my head.

Wait, didn't that Jesus guy say something about this? I remembered a few years ago that I was sick in bed watching TV. Some televangelist weirdo talking on the set. It was some big fat black guy. He was wearing an overstuffed three-piece suit and was standing behind a cheap pulpit on some badly lit TV studio set. He was yelling. It really annoyed me, but I was too sick to get up to change the channel. I remembered that he said it was prayer. He said that God always heard your prayer, or answered, or both, or something. I couldn't quite remember what he said exactly. I was pretty sick that day. And I never read a Bible, so I wasn't in a position to know. Hmm, could that be the Big Guy's communication uplink? Maybe after this was all over I might have to crack a Bible to check it. I'm just naturally curious that way.

Asahina put away the phone and walked back over to me. Then she nodded to herself, then looked back up at me. "Yes, Kyon. We use the TPDD. It is the device that the Higher Power has given us for submitting time-travel requests."

Oh man, I really wanted to see this.

"I'm sorry, Kyon. The particulars are still classified. You will have to leave before I use it."

Drat.

"Goodbye, Kyon. Thank you for the information."

Sigh.

"Goodbye."

I went home.

* * *

Excuse me sir, I'm sorry to bother you.

_Oh hi Mikuru, what's up?_

I need to ask you a favor again.

_Sure, what is it?_

Asahina then explained her request.

_No, I can't do that. It would be too deus ex machina. The readers would hate it._

Asahina then proposed another solution.

_Hey, I like that. It's pretty intricate though. I have a new big software project so I can't write any more chapters for a few months. _

Of course sir, I understand. It is a shame that Kyonko will be stuck here for so long.

_Naw, it will just be one day for her. I'll just write 'The next day..'_

Of course sir.

___Meanwhile I hope, while I'm away, that some other fan fic writers will pick up the slack and write more Kyon and Kyonko adventure stories._

Yes sir, that would be wonderful.

_Anything else?_

No sir. Oh, by the way, I just got off the phone with Ky. He sends his regards.

_Great, please send your husband mine. _

I will. Goodbye.

* * *

**A/N:**

Dear reader, in this story you are Kyon. You are the protagonist.

However, it is at this point in the story in that I want to stop and make a confession to you.

I am messing with you.

I am trying to trick and fool you. It is deliberate. I admit it. I am playing mind games with you, the readers of my story.

Now, I don't cheat. I do play fair. You can safely assume that all the information that I feed you is accurate, that everything Kyon sees or hears is true. However, Kyon does sometimes misinterpret or misunderstand what he sees. Often he will go back and re-evaluate previous information under a new light, or with new insight.

In the mechanics of this story I confess that I am using misdirection and sleight of hand. Think of me as a Christian version of Penn Jillette.

The reason I am messing with you is that I want to shake you up. To shake up your worldview.

Eventually in my final story Kyon will become a full blown Christian just before he dies.

Now, in the little game that I am playing with you, I am doing philosophical magic card tricks. I am slowly dealing out the cards in my hand.

The card that I have just played, here in Chapter 5, is the Jack of Diamonds.

The card that I had played in the previous chapter, Chapter 4, was the King of Diamonds. Chapter 2 was the 10 of Diamonds.

The best cards in my hand are my aces: the Ace of Spades, the Ace of Clubs, the Ace of Diamonds, and the Ace of Hearts.

I will be playing my first ace, the Ace of Spades, in Chapter 9.

Please play with me. The game is fun.


	6. Chapter 6: The Melancholy of Kyonko

**Chapter 6: The Melancholy of Kyonko**

The next day nothing happened.

And the day after that nothing happened.

And the week after that.

And the month after that.

It was all over. Her world had ended. All of the other worlds had ended. I knew that Kyonko would be trapped here for the rest of her life.

What could be done? What could possibly be done? I was determined to do everything in my power to try to help her to find a new life here, to continue to live on. Somehow.

* * *

I contacted Koizmui's Organization to set up Kyonko's new identity. She would be my biological sister who had moved in to live with her older adult brother's family until she graduated.

Kyonko asked me if Koizumi could change her official birthday to be on Tanabata, July 7. That was fine with me; it was only a few weeks different from her and my real birthday. Koizumi said he would arrange it.

I checked with Koizumi a few days later to see how things were progressing. I was surprised when he told me it would take several additional days to set everything up. For the Organization? Really? He explained it to me. "Kyon, you think we can just do anything with the snap of our fingers? Everything is computerized nowadays. It's not like we can just forge a bunch of paper documents like in the movie _The Great Escape_."

I shrugged. "Just hack some computer databases, right?"

"No, old fashioned computer hacking isn't really possible anymore. Everything is too interconnected now. We would have to insert duplicate data into a bunch of different government computer databases in the Japanese government ministries simultaneously. We'd need to set up her Social Insurance ID number, her National Health Insurance ID number, and have it all cross-check without triggering an exception. It's not a trivial task.

"All the government computers are cross-connected. With all the concerns about terrorism and hacking they've gotten somewhat paranoid. They now use triple-encrypted AES-2024, public key, SecurID, hardware tokens. It's a lot harder than it was just 10 years ago."

"Wait, don't you have spies inside every government agency?"

"C'mon, Kyon. Don't be like those cranks who believe in the Trilateral Commission or the Illuminati. The number of members in our Organization is actually rather small. Most of them are on detached duty watching the P.O.I.s. Back on Kyonko's world the biggest task was monitoring Haruki Suzumiya. About a third of our members were on that detail. Here I'm the only one watching Haruhi. You don't count anymore."

I remembered that the Organization had dumped me as a Person of Interest over four years ago. "Really? Gee, thanks bud."

"Don't mention it."

I asked him, "So how do you do it now?"

"We use an even older method: social engineering. One of our operatives poses as a bureaucrat in another department and phones his counterpart to ask to have the record updated. It's a simple method, but it takes time to hit all the different government departments without arousing suspicion."

Well, the simplest methods are usually the best. I delegated the remainder of the forgery job to Koizumi and Kyonko.

Only later did I realize that was a mistake.

* * *

Haruhi and I arranged for Kyonko to have Ayu's bedroom. We put Ayu in the same bedroom as Katai. Ayu didn't like it. "I'm a big girl now! I want my own room!" Katai simply clapped her hands in delight. She was far less voluble than her fraternal twin sister.

It was time to enroll Kyonko at North High.

Haruhi and I escorted Kyonko into the Vice Principal's office for our appointment. He was a kindly older gentleman with gray sideburns. I was about to introduce my sister when Kyonko stepped forward did the introductions herself. "Sir, these are my parents, Mr. and Mrs. Suzumiya." We bowed.

Parents? I'm supposed to be her older brother, not her father. Hey, wait..

Haruhi didn't miss a beat. She glomped on Kyonko and beamed, "Isn't our daughter just so adorable!" So, Haruhi was in on Kyonko's little scheme.

It was my fault for delegating the forgery job to a mischievous teenage girl. The Vice Principal looked at all of us. He squinted. I could see that he was doing the math in his head. "My, you do look rather young for a couple of your age."

I jumped in to try to salvage the situation. "Uh, yes, right, we didn't want children so soon being so, uh, young and all." I did the math myself furiously in my own head. What could our youngest possible age be? "Uh, yes, we're both uh, 34."

He raised an eyebrow. "Ah, so you had your daughter while still in high school?"

Ugh, my math sucks. "Uh, well, we got married right out of high school and had our wonderful daughter, uh, only a couple months later." Oops.

"I see. Well, no matter." We proceeded with the paperwork and we signed it.

Great, I just basically told the Vice Principal that I knocked up a girl in high school! Haruhi was shooting laser beams at me with her eyes. Kyonko watched us both with a silly grin. She was clearly enjoying the spectacle.

The three of us walked home together afterwards. Haruhi kicked me. "Kyon, you told him I was a slut! How could you!"

Kyonko leaned against me with her arm raised to her forehead theatrically. "That's right.. I am tragically.. a love child!"

Ugh, I am so dead tonight.

I grabbed Kyonko's arm while trying to think up an appropriate punishment for my new daughter. "Young lady you are supposed to be my _sister_."

"Kyon, it wouldn't have worked. Both our parents are still alive. It would have just brought up lots of awkward questions about why my brother is my legal guardian and not my actual parents. The Vice Principal would have tried to contact them to confirm your guardianship, and then the jig would have been up."

Little miss smarty-pants always had a ready answer for anything. I growled, "Still, you should have warned me about your little stunt ahead of time."

She batted her eyelashes at me innocently. I wasn't buying the cutesy act. "Please don't look at me like that, Kyon. Not telling you was your wife's idea, not mine." Her smiled widened. She was having entirely too much fun at our expense.

Haruhi retargeted her laser beams at her new daughter. "My idea? You steered me into it you little sneak!" She sputtered. "You knew this would happen.. both of you.. both of you are completely incorrigible!"

Kyonko then skipped ahead of us, with her ponytail bouncing up and down.

I slept on the couch that night.

* * *

As the days passed I gradually learned that nothing was more dangerous to my peace of mind than a bored Kyonko. One day my toothpaste turned my teeth blood-red, like a vampire. Another day my business website started making fart noises whenever I visited a page on it. On another day a crazed Shamisen tried to shred my socks while I was still wearing them. They were coated with spray-on catnip.

Haruhi got pranked too sometimes. But for some reason it seemed that I was Kyonko's preferred target. I was not flattered by her attentions. It was driving me up the wall. "Stop it!"

"Sorry Kyon, I can't help it. The way you react is just too fun to watch, you're such a patsy."

Then finally one day I discovered the joy of sitting on a toilet seat that was coated with nitrogen triiodide. After the firecracker bangs subsided I had to find some sodium thiosulfate to wipe the purple marks off my butt. That was the last straw.

"JUST STOP IT!"

I was genuinely angry. Something in my facial expression must have rattled her. She stopped pranking me after that.

After that she basically ignored me. She would just disappear in her bedroom for hours at a time. Starting in the Fall she would be taking AP classes at the junior level. That ought to keep her busy. But what to do until then?

Haruhi was getting worried. "Kyon, we need to do something to cheer her up." I looked at the calendar on the fridge. I silently pointed at July 7. Haruhi jumped and clapped. "That's perfect! I'll make the phone calls and all the arrangements."

And so, on Tanabata, we celebrated the reunion of the SOS Brigade and Kyonko's sweet-sixteen birthday party. We held the celebration at the café outside of North High. It was a huge party, the biggest we ever had. Haruhi pulled out all the stops. Everyone was there.

We all wore silly conical birthday-party hats. Asahina arrived a little late and appeared to be a bit intoxicated. Haruhi made it a point to escort the gorgeous time traveller to a seat next to Tsuruya, as far away from me as possible. Haruhi resumed her seat on my left. Nagato was sitting across from me. She looked particularly silly with her party hat and her frozen blank expression. Kyonko was to my right. Even Koizumi was having a good time.

We sang songs and shared stories about our Brigade days. Tsuruya told a goofy story about her and Asahina fixing a time problem with some guy called The Doctor. Kyonko then shared a funny story about Haruki commandeering the microphone at a school-wide assembly to warn everyone of some imaginary alien-invasion threat. Koizumi told a goofy tale that I didn't quite catch, something about a neurotic shinjin that wanted a puppy?

Kyonko grinned and put her hands behind her head and leaned her chair back until it was tipped up against the wall. I caught the gesture and did the same. She leaned towards me and said_ sotto voce_, "Haruki's threat wasn't imaginary."

I had already figured that out. Harkuki wished for the alien threat to be real, and so it was. I whispered, "Who was it?"

"Sky Canopy Dominion."

Kyonko's world had ended during the Brigade's first year, just before the Endless Summer. It was way too early in the timeline for them to run into a heavyweight baddie like the Sky Canopy Dominion. Apparently Haruki must have found a way to dispatch them.

It was Asahina's turn to tell a story. She just giggled. "I really can't tell any stories.. they are all clashish-clashified.." She seemed far more intoxicated than when she first arrived. That was odd as the café did not serve alcohol.

It was my turn. I spun a totally bogus yarn about what 'really happened' when Haruhi and I stripped off our clothes to dry in the cave during the Remote Island Murder Mystery. Haruhi furiously whacked my shoulder about three times, which basically confirmed everyone's suspicions and made it even funnier.

I looked over at Asahina. Her head was tilted to the side and she seemed lost in her own private thoughts. I knew why. She was silently telling tales to herself that she could never, ever, share.

We then went around the table and told another cycle of stories, with each one getting sillier. Then we decided to have a contest. We would each tell one really wild fantastic tale, with each of us trying to out-do the other. We would then take a vote and the winner got to take home the leftover pizza. The pizza was really good - there were two whole pies left - so I decided I would try to win the contest.

My turn was last. I had real competition. I mean, I never knew Koizumi could be so creative. So I took a deep breath and spun my tale. It was an elaborate and fantastical yarn about Harurhi transporting us to Alice in Wonderland. In my story Shamisen was the Cheshire Cat and Haruhi became the Mad Hatter. That tale got the biggest laughs. I knew I was going to win.

Then Yuki Nagato spoke up, "I have a story."

The chatter slowed and then stopped, as everyone's head turned to face the Humanoid Entity.

We waited.

She remained silent. It was getting awkward. I leaned across the table and held Yuki's hand. I spoke softly to her, "It's ok. We'd love to hear your story."

She hesitated. Then she looked at Kyonko. "I require your permission to tell it."

Kyonko was surprised at the sudden attention she was receiving from the whole table. She spoke through a mouthful of pizza, "Uh, yeah, sure. I don't have anything to hide. Go ahead, Nagato."

We waited patiently for several moments.

Then Yuki told her story.

"It is a story about a little girl with a ponytail. It is about the time when she was spirited away."

Kyonko's eyes widened. "Hey! I mean, uh.. look, what happened there was between him and me. It was private. I mean, I didn't even know who the guy was at the time. I was only 10."

Yuki seemed to be upsetting Kyonko. What was going on?

Kyonko wiped some tomato paste off the side of her mouth and became somewhat serious, "You see, I think what happened was really personal for him. I mean understand why you are bringing it up now, and I don't mind if you tell what happened as far as I'm concerned, but Yuuki's gone now. You're not going to get his permission. I still want to respect his feelings even though he's dead." Her voice caught. "Yuki, we can't tell this story. I'm sorry."

"Yuuki has given permission."

Kyonko jumped up, "He has!? You have contact with him right now? Where is he? I need to speak with him! Please, where is he?"

"I am sorry, his data has been permanently lost. It cannot be retrieved."

Kyonko slumped back in her chair. She put her head in her hands. "Then we can't tell this story. I'm sorry.. really.. it is kind of personal for me too. I mean, it's a wonderful and beautiful story. But Yuuki needs to be the one to tell it, not you. And he's gone, he's dead. So I'm sorry, Nagato, I can't let you tell this story, I'm sorry."

Yuki was oddly insistent, "But I wish to tell it. Yuuki has given permission. He greatly desires for me to tell it."

Kyonko raised her head up from her hands, "I don't get it."

I said to the Humanoid Interface, "Yuki, just explain how you got permission from Yuuki."

The Humanoid Interface looked at me, "If you recall, I had synchronized with Yuuki four years ago on Haruki's world. We exchanged data. So at that time I became him and he became me. We have since diverged, and my current synaptic state is no longer valid to represent him. We are no longer the same individual."

Kyonko said, "That's true."

"I have just analyzed a model of him based on the remnants of the synchronization data that I had received four years ago. It is a partial model using an isolated and firewalled section of my own synaptic system, my own brain, so to speak."

So that was why Yuki was hesitating earlier. She was running an internal sim of Yuuki in her head. I said, "Go on."

"Based on the partial and incomplete model that I ran, I am now certain with 99% or higher probability that the part of me that was Yuuki wishes for me to tell this story."

Kyonko wiped off her face with the sleeve of her cardigan, then she looked at me, "Kyon, it's actually a pretty good story. It all happened before my brother was born. It's about how our parents almost died. Yuuki and I rescued and saved them. Yuuki's name was Haku back then. I didn't learn that it was really Yuuki helping and protecting me until I joined the Brigade five years later. It was about a month before the Great Ending when he finally told me."

Wow. I just _had_ to hear this story.

She got a tear in her eye, "Yuuki told me a lot of his secrets then. It was wonderful. He must have known he was going to die."

I made a mental note to ask her about those secrets at a later time, in private.

Kyonko tipped her chair back like she was getting ready to daydream, "This is a really really nice story. Go ahead, Nagato. I'm just going to close my eyes and listen."

Yuki began to speak. We all leaned in to listen to Yuki's soft monotone. As she spoke, I noticed that her voice seemed a bit softer than usual and was at a somewhat lower register or pitch. The voice was very soft and yet at the same time it seemed to hold enormous power and strength.

Then I realized she was sounding exactly like Yuuki.

* * *

This was Yuuki's story.

Once upon a time, there was a little girl with a ponytail. She was 10 years old.

Her name was [redacted]. Her parents were driving her to their new home and they took a wrong turn. The car became lost in the woods. They finally arrived at the entrance of a strange old amusement park. The mother and father were hungry and wanted to eat, and they tried to walk into the strange amusement park to find some food.

The little girl was afraid to walk into the amusement park. She tried to pull her parents back to the car. But they were hungry, so they ignored her and walked inside. She was forced to follow them.

They had crossed a border, a strange, almost magical, border. It somehow spirited the whole family away to another dimension. They were spirited away.

Her parents disappeared, and the little girl was all alone. She could not find her parents anywhere.

The little girl was in a strange place. It was a place of aliens and spirits. Humans were not allowed in this strange place and would be killed on sight. Now, at the center of this strange place was a large hotel, a sort of Japanese bathhouse, for the aliens and spirits to stay and relax. The hotel was surrounded by a moat and crossed by a red bridge.

There was only one way for a human to avoid being killed in this strange place: To cross the red bridge in secret, find the proprietor of the hotel, and then immediately ask for employment and become an indentured serf.

One of the human serfs was a boy named Haku (a nickname). He was 12. When he saw the little girl outside the moat, he ran to the little girl and urged her to hide or she would lose her life. He said that her parents were taken away, captured, and turned into pigs. He said he would try to protect her. But he warned her she must ask the hotel's proprietor, an ugly old witch named Yubaba, for employment immediately.

The little girl wanted to find and rescue her parents. So she snuck across the moat then climbed all the way up, up, up to the very top of the hotel. There she found the evil witch Yubaba, who made her an indentured serf. Yubaba controlled her by taking away her name from her memory. She could no longer remember her name. If she could remember her name again, she could escape and be free.

Now, in this strange land was a flying serpent. It was very beautiful dragon. Yubaba feared the dragon, but she also controlled it. She controlled it because she had taken away the dragon's name.

Kyonko interrupted, "Kyon, I flew on a _dragon_. I was riding on its neck holding on for dear life. He wouldn't let me fall. It was Haku. He could change himself into a beautiful white and green wyrm. You should have seen him. He was majestic. He was the most beautiful creature I had ever seen. We _flew_. I rode his back. I really did.

"He was trying to save me, but Yubaba attacked and gravely injured him in his dragon form."

Yuki continued to the tell story using Yuuki's voice. It turned out that Yubaba had secretly poisoned Haku, and he became gravely ill. After many adventures the little girl found a way to cure Haku and to release him from Yubaba's control by giving him back his true name. In doing so the little girl made many friends, including a great monster (that was not a monster) and another kindly witch that was Yubaba's sister.

Kyonko chimed in again, "I managed to get my own name back, [redacted]. We were free. "

Kyonko rocked her chair forward so it was sitting on all four legs again. She took over telling the rest of the story from Yuki.

"You see, I had discovered Haku's true name, and while I was riding his back I told it to him. He suddenly kind of exploded in a mass of white dragon scales. He then gloriously appeared in a form that I didn't understand, then he quickly transformed himself back into a boy and we fell from the sky. I wasn't afraid that we were going to die, because even as we were falling to earth he was still protecting me, saving me from harm, even at the expense of his own life.

"Now, as we were falling Haku told me he was the living embodiment of some kind of interdimensional barrier or something, symbolized by a river. That river was a living manifestation of himself. Apparently his duty was to act as a shield to keep humans out of this weird alien spirit zone. I think the job was specifically assigned to him by the Data Integration Thought Entity, and he had been doing it for a very long time.

"So, we fell into the great river, which was really Haku himself. That was how we survived the fall. That interdimensional barrier surrounded the whole place. Now, because I was finally able to discover the true name of the river, he was now freed from Yubaba's enslavement. So he became the river again, permanently, and resumed his vigilance as the interdimensional barrier. Humans could no longer blunder inside.

"We parted for the last time. I was sad because I thought I would never see him again.

"I was finally able to rescue our parents and get the heck out of there. It was a life changing experience for me. I grew up a bit. I was no longer a little scared kid. I haven't really been scared of much of anything since that time, I mean not really."

Kyonko looked down, "I think I got that courage from Yuuki when he was Haku." She sighed, "He saved me. He was my guardian angel. Just before the Great Ending he told me who he really was, his secret name. I still don't fully understand what he told me, not really. All I know is that I miss him. I really do."

The story was over and the room was silent.

Then Yuki spoke, "I do not desire the pizza."

* * *

The party then resumed and we gabbed with Kyonko about her amazing adventure. Then we entertained ourselves far into the night with some other stories, including some really good ones from Tsuruya and Kimidori. Kyonko was having a ball. What I didn't know then was that this would be the high point of her life in my world.

It was finally getting late, and the café needed to close. As the party broke up we gave our hugs and goodbyes. Asahina stumbled over towards me, her eyes bloodshot. She mumbled, "I don't care how jealous he gets," then she planted a sloppy kiss right on my lips. It caught me completely by surprise. Her breath was 120 proof. Tsuruya quickly moved in and made apologies and escorted her out the door.

I waited for the inevitable reaction from Haruhi. But I was wrong - instead of slugging my shoulder she held my arm and pressed her head against it. "I really feel sorry for her, Kyon."

I felt the same. It was obvious that Asahina was spiking her drinks. I bet her liver probably wasn't in good shape. I leaned my head on hers. "Well, can you really blame the poor girl? She already knows every major event that will happen in her life.. she's a time traveller with foreknowledge of her future.. she has no free will. None at all. She probably even knows exactly when and how she will die."

Haruhi sighed and looked at the empty doorway. "I know. She's so depressed. She planted that kiss on you because she knows that is as far as it will ever go."

Haruhi was right. I felt relieved that particular temptation would never happen.

No free will, that must be terrible. It was no small wonder that Asahina kept calling everything 'classified'.

Then I noticed that Kyonko was watching us. She saw the whole thing. She seemed thoughtful. I waved her over. "Hey kid, it's late. Let's go home."

She still had her silly conical birthday hat on. We all walked together in silence. She wouldn't take the hat off until later, when she was alone her bedroom. Then she saved it among her most prized possessions. I did not realize the significance of that hat until much later.

* * *

As the days went on I noticed a gradual change in Kyonko's personality. She was getting moody. She didn't talk much at meal time. She wasn't eating much either. Often she slept in.

She would soon start classes in North High. That should give her an opportunity to make friends and get involved in school activities. Maybe she would get better.

In the past, Haruki's SOS Brigade antics kept her far too busy to study for classes, though she still somehow managed to get fairly good grades anyway. Without the Brigade I knew that boredom would be her biggest problem. Haruhi and I signed her up to take AP and junior level courses. It would keep her plenty busy. She would be a year younger than most of the other students in her class, but I knew that without the Brigade activities she would have plenty of time to excel in her studies.

It was Kyonko's first day at North High. That evening I tried to make some dinner conversation. "So, how was school today? Meet any new friends? Like your classes?" Her responses were mono-syllabic. She poked at her food and didn't eat it.

This continued as the days went on. She was getting skinnier, even gaunt.

* * *

It was after our eldest 'daughter' had left for school and I had returned from dropping off Ayu and Katai at the pre-school that Haruhi and I would have our liaisons. There was a good reason why all of our windows were double-glazed and soundproofed and why we lived in a standalone house and not an apartment. That was rather rare in Japan, but with Haruhi's royalty income we could afford it.

And we needed to be careful; we didn't want a third child that quickly.

Afterwards Haruhi would lay with her head in the crook of my arm. This was when we had our most serious discussions. One day while the sweat was cooling off Haruhi gazed up at the ceiling and spoke her thoughts aloud.

"She doesn't belong here. It's wrong."

"I know. I'm sorry."

"We have to send her back."

"She's not going home. There's no way. I've already talked with everybody in the Brigade, every resource I have. There's nothing we can do. Her old world is literally gone."

She sighed, turned and looked at me.

"There's no way? No way that I can help? Even just this once? I know it would be breaking my promise."

"I'm sorry. There's nothing you can do. The problem is at a higher level. We can't fix it. Not down here. Everything is gone. It's over. Let's just help her make the best of it."

She turned back again and thought a bit. "Kyon, I think she's getting depressed. I mean clinically depressed. I think she needs to see to see a psychologist."

Haruhi knew something about psychology. She and I took Psych1101 together in college. I got her to sign up for the course with me. I admit that I had ulterior motives, I mean, in addition to getting a chance to see her more often. She needed to learn about psychology to help her understand her own self-absorbed personality better.

We split up the homework assignments. I was careful to always give her certain topics. Topics like Narcissistic Personality Disorder, Asocial Behavior, stuff like that. Not that I thought she had those full-blown disorders mind you. I just thought it would be good that she learned about them, and about herself. She never caught on.

It was a good college course. I learned a lot about how the mind worked, things like Asperger's Syndrome. Back then I thought that Haruhi might possibly have something like low-grade Asperger's.

But there was no point in sending Kyonko to see a shrink. She would resist, and she was way too smart anyway. She'd just turn it into a game. The psychologist would administer a series of tests like the Minnesota Multiphasic Inventory, the MMPI-2. But I knew she would only give answers the shrink wanted to hear.

There was an 'L' scale on the MMPI-2 specifically to detect lying. She'd evade that one easily. And there was a 'K' scale to detect more subtle dissembling. That was harder to fool. Now, some elevation on 'K' was normal. People with higher educational level or higher socioeconomic status regularly scored a bit higher on that scale. Kyonko would answer at just the right level to look natural. There were other scales to detect inconsistency and random answers. She'd evade those too.

Just for fun she might even deliberately peg the 'Pd' or 'Sc' scales as a complete psycho, a psychopathic deviant, a schizophrenic, or something worse. And it would look absolutely real. She'd play-act the role too. She'd sit on the couch and talk like Kevin Spacy in the movie_ Se7en_. The shrink would freak out and think he was looking at the next Ted Bundy. He'd wonder where the bodies were buried before he called the police. That was exactly the kind of prank she would pull just to amuse herself.

No, the real problem was situational depression. Other than pump her full of anti-depressant drugs there wasn't much we could do about it. I couldn't see Kyonko taking Prozac or Paxil or anything like that to mask a situational problem.

Haruhi was right. She needed to go home. But how?

And if I found a way to send her home?

Then she would be happy. Problem solved.

But not for me. As soon as she disappeared from my universe I would forget her completely. When her world-line jumped back it would be like she was never here. She never was, never is, and never will be. My memory of all the events that we shared, the birthday party, of everything we had done together, it would all be erased from my mind. I felt melancholy.

* * *

It was October. The leaves on the trees were starting to turn. Kyonko's depression was not getting any better. I needed to do something.

During dinner I made my gambit. Haruhi had left the table and was in the other room talking with her agent on her cell. I put down my chopsticks and looked at Kyonko. "Hey, you know I think I spotted that Morimoto boy yesterday when I picked you up from school. I saw his eyes following you when you walked by him. I mean his eyes were _really_ following you."

I chuckled inwardly as I remembered Morimoto's puppy-dog gaze. It was the same look I had long ago, more than once actually, back when I was a hormone-filled teenage boy. It was same lovesick gaze I had for the beautiful Ryoko Asakura when the teacher introduced her as the student representative of class 1-1. She was so lovely. It took me almost a week to get up the nerve to chat with her the first time. She blew me off but she was really polite about it. Of course, this was all before I learned that she was an alien and a complete psycho.

"Kyon, I know what you're doing. I do appreciate it. I know you're just trying to help, and that's ok, but I don't feel like seeing anybody else right now." She began to get up from the table.

Wait.. she just said 'anybody else'. Who else was there?

"You know if you just took off that cardigan sweater once in a while I bet the boys will give you a lot more attention."

She stuffed her hands in its pockets. "I like my cardigan."

She went upstairs to her room.

Katai tried to follow her. I stopped my four year old daughter and said, "Sweetie, please leave her alone." She usually listened to me, but this time she ignored my request and followed her upstairs anyway.

* * *

October went into November. The trees were bare.

It was early afternoon on a cold and damp Thursday. Haruhi came running downstairs to my basement office. I could immediately tell from her expression that something was wrong. "What is it?"

"Kyon, I was cleaning up her room. I was turning the mattress over and found this underneath." She handed me an artist's sketchbook.

I flipped through the sketchbook. It was a series of hand-drawn sketches, some were quick line drawings, others were detailed studies in pencil. There were only two subjects, always the same, one in each portrait. The first was a tall athletic man with dark hair, an aquiline nose, and fiery eyes. On his brow was a thin circlet of gold like that of a god or a greek king. The second subject was a gentle giant with light hair, wearing reading glasses, with incredibly thoughtful eyes.

I continued to flip through it. Many of the sketches were amazingly detailed, some were breathtakingly beautiful. It reminded me of Andrew Wyeth's famous Helga Pictures, the more than 200 drawings and paintings created by the famous painter in his secret passion for a German girl named Helga Testorf.

These were dozens of sketches drawn by a passionate artist who was preoccupied with her subjects. It was obvious: Kyonko was obsessed with returning home to see them again. And it would never stop unless we did something. She was already spiraling down to her destruction.

We stared at each other. "Kyon, what can we do?"

I had no idea.

* * *

**A/N:**

I think that Kyonko at age 10 looks exactly like Chihiro in Hayao Miyazaki's most famous animated film, _Spirited Away_ (2001). I have owned a DVD copy of the film for years (it is one of my favorites) and I somehow missed the physical resemblance until very recently. It's so obvious! I mean, look at her! (See below for the AMV.)

According to Wikipedia, Miyazaki's magnum opus was the most successful film in all of Japanese film history, grossing over $274 million worldwide. In Japan it even beat the film _Titanic_. It was the first Japanese film to win an Academy Award for Best Animated Feature.

On the DVD you will see the famous Pixar film director John Lasseter (_Toy Story, Cars_) just rave and rave about _Spirited Away _and about Miyazaki's genius. He says Miyazaki is a big inspiration for a lot of the writers and artists at Pixar. You see John Lasseter meet Miyazaki and just gush at the little Japanese man, who looked a bit bewildered about the whole thing.

John Lasseter pulled out all the stops to create a top-quality English dub of the film. He hired several notable voice actors including Suzanne Pleshette, David Ogden Stiers, John Ratzenberger, Daveigh Chase, and Jason Marsden (as Haku).

Having Kyonko be Chihiro really develops Kyonko's character. It explains why she doesn't scare easily. She's flown on a dragon, befriended some scary but friendly spirits, met a scary but kindly witch, and ran into lots of scary creatures and survived, all at age 10.

Kyon missed out on the life-changing experiences of _Spirited Away_ in his world, which is why he's a bit more of a coward.

And of course Haku is Yuuki! It's practically the same character in an earlier and younger form, maybe a bit more vocal and more serious. (In my story Yuuki has a hidden and subtle playful side, so does Yuki, that only our heros ever get to see.) Haku is always deadly serious, instantly devotes himself to protecting her, and immediately tries to sacrifice his own life to save her without hesitation. Haku is obviously not human. He seems to be Kyonko's guardian angel or something. But who is he really? In the final chapter I will play a spade card that reveals his true identity (ditto Yuki). It is a very important part of the story's main thesis.

I had a sudden inspiration from the dragon flight scene. It will appear again in the very end of the story. I'm using the famous poem _High Flight_. It had me bawling with tears of joy again (that ending.. man.. it's getting transcendent now.)

**See the AMV: **To get a hint of the power of my ending for_ Final Act_, I strongly urge you to see the following YouTube AMV. It is a five minute musical montage of Chihiro and Haku trying to survive in _Spirited Away. _Note the dragon scenes, especially when Kyonko rides Haku. Get your hankies ready. Search for the YouTube video by xPhiloSophiex named spirited away we found love (All lowercase.)

The AMV is an outstanding music montage of Yuuki's protection of Kyonko. It really brings out the feelings that Yuuki began to slowly develop for Kyonko during this time (it's subtle but you can see it). I didn't ever expect to find a YouTube video that even begins to understand my thesis for _Final Act._ This one does. Amazing. Simply amazing.

The soundtrack "We Found Love (in a Hopeless Place)" is a cover by Sam Tsui of Rihanna's infamous video (260+ million hits on hate-sex, drug use, sigh..) You can find Sam Tsui's beautiful cover on YouTube if you search for We Found Love (Rihanna) - Sam Tsui Cover. It is amazing how a song can be so totally inverted simply by the singer's mood and intonation. The lyrics are actually the same (!). He shot the video at home (I think). He has other great covers too. Rock on, Sam Tsui!

In my mind, the YouTube AMV spirited away we found love perfectly captures the relationship that began to grow between Kyonko and Yuuki. It leads ultimately to a deep and profound kind of love (beyond even _agape_) that I carefully develop throughout the story of _Final Act_. There is literally no word for it in the English language. Remember, Yuuki is a transcendent being. He did his duty protecting her, but he did not originally understand his own emotions (neither did Yuki). This is very important. It has to do with Yuki's epiphany and her disastrous sync with Yuuki in _Realization_. (Hint: Transcendent beings can learn new things too.) It is critical to the launching point for the whole transfinite run-up to when I throw down my supernova bomb. At the end of this story I will throw down my final two high cards, the Ace of Hearts and the Ace of Diamonds. I have been carefully developing my last 2-card play across this entire story (and it will end up at over 100,000 words before I done). When I take my final bow and detonate my supernova bomb, the explosion should be visible from galaxy M31 (I hope).

If you want a sneak peek at the ending of this story, start with this AMV and then extrapolate from there up to a fully mature Kyonko as a grown woman, and a mature Yuuki that finally understands his own feelings and his true relationship to and with Kyonko. Note the lyrics of the AMV. (Hint: "We found love in a hopeless place.")

And that's just like 10% of what I'm going to hit you with in the final pages.

You can find videos of the poem _High Flight _on YouTube as well. Yes, High Flight. I'm adding it as the final ending coda: the dragon ride of pure joy. The last line of this story will be ".. and she touched the face of God."

That is so powerful, and yet it is just a tiny fraction what I got ready for the final chapter. This whole ending I have cooked up.. my word.. I don't know how I did it. I think I'm getting higher help from somewhere (yes, I'm serious).

Anyway, the story will soon start to speed up. Get ready to have your mind blown in Chapter 8. And there is a huge expansion of the story starting in Chapter 9, when it starts to go epic.


	7. Chapter 7: Kyonko Causes Trouble

**Chapter 7: Kyonko Causes Trouble**

After the birthday party, Haruhi and I had sat down and explained to the twins that Kyonko was going to stay with us forever. She would be their new adopted older sister. Ayu didn't like it, but Katai was thrilled.

Ayu typically played outside with the neighbor kids. Katai preferred to stay inside. She would go to Kyonko's room and ask her to play. They did tea parties with Katai's dollies. And if a dollie got broken she'd ask Kyonko to mend it for her. It seemed almost as if Katai could somehow sense Kyonko's sadness and took it upon herself to try to cheer her up.

Kyonko's depression was starting to rub off on me. I was finding it harder to concentrate at the computer.

I knew that we had to get her mind off things. She had to let go of Haruki. She had to move on with her life.

* * *

One day Kyonko came home from school and slammed the front door behind her.

From the kitchen I said, "And how was school today?"

There was silence. I leaned my head through the doorway to look. I saw her and then I realized my mistake. I definitely should not have asked her that question.

I could see the eruption starting. "School is sooo boring. And stupid.."

I recognized that look on her face. I had seen it many times on Haruhi's face just before she exploded into a huge tirade. But I never saw it on Kyonko's face until now.

She threw her book bag down and stomped over to me. "Kyon, what the [bleep] is wrong with the schools in your world?"

Yep, thar she blows.

"Arggh! I mean, teaching evolution to kids? C'mon, who cares about that crap? In my world we learned _useful_ stuff, or stuff that would make us better citizens. You know, economics, civics, the constitution, history. I mean there's not a single decent history course in my school's whole curriculum! You ever heard the saying, 'Those who ignore history are doomed to repeat it'? There's no history course at that school! It's just touched on in Social Studies!

"I mean, why do they teach evolution to kids for crying out loud? It's such a waste of time. I mean, ontogeny recapitulates phylogeny. Who cares?"

I shrugged. "Uh, maybe the educators who write the curriculum think it's important?"

"But why is it important? The curriculum is already so packed, and so much of it seems like wasteful crap."

She was in full melt-down rant mode. I just decided to nod my head and go along with it. Ride out the storm. I was used to it with Haruhi.

She glared at me. "Why waste so much time on freaking evolution? Oh.. wait.. I know now. It's another stupid atheist thing, isn't it? They're clinging to evolution like a life-raft to support their tiny worldview. Oh nooo.. we can't have an observant God now could we? That would be awful. That meant there might be, you know, _judgement_ or something. And we can't possibly have that. Oh nooo... It's stupid!"

I rolled along with it. "Yeah, it's the old creationism versus evolution debate. On the Internet it's pretty much a guaranteed flame-war. They argue about it all the time. I try to avoid it."

"I know, right? It is sooo stupid. Insisting that God created the world in seven literal 24-hour days? I mean, how long is a day to God anyway? What does time even mean at that level? It's such a small-minded interpretation of Genesis. Such small minds.. always trying to put God in a box. They want to take it out on Sunday mornings, sing a few hymns, then put it back in the box and go home. God is so much bigger than that. I've only flipped through the Bible a couple of times but even I know that's not how it works. It's supposed to be a _relationship_, two-way communication between levels. If they were Christians, I mean _real_ Christians, they should be doing it, I mean that kind of communication, every single day!"

I just kept nodding and waited for her ranting to burn itself out.

"Bah! Atheists are even worse. They don't want to be bothered at all. It's all threatening to them, so they go in denial and cling to evolution like it was a shield or something. C'mon! I mean, all of amazing creation is right there in front of them! It's not random. I mean, sure there's adaptation, life adapts. But there's a method underneath it all somewhere. I'm sure of it. It's too elegant, too beautiful. We did microbiology in class today. Have you ever seen a monarch butterfly's wing under a microscope? Heck, just go outside! See the cherry blossoms falling, the cicadas singing, the sun rising behind Mount Fuji. It's all so wonderful and beautiful. I mean, it's all right there.. it's all right in front of their eyes.. the whole of glorious creation is all right there! Right in front of them! It's all so stupid. Stupid!"

I decided to do something to change the topic. I sat down at the chessboard and reset the pieces. "Hey, let's play another game, ok? Let me play white."

"Kyon, we've played chess, what, at least 30 times? I kicked your keister every time. The last five games I spotted you a rook."

Actually the last game she also spotted me a queen. I didn't say anything.

"Gaah!" She stormed upstairs and slammed the door to her room.

I then noticed that Katai was hiding behind my legs. I picked her up. "It's okay, sweetie. She's just feeling sad." The little girl looked on and said nothing.

* * *

That night Haruhi and I discussed the problem in bed. She turned and looked at me. "Kyon, we need to do something."

"Yeah, I know. Her brain is spinning with no input. She needs a distraction."

"That's right, a distraction. Something to keep her mind off things."

"Sure, but what? I can't keep her mentally engaged. It's hopeless."

"Kyon, is there anything that someone else could do? Someone other than us, I mean? Someone who could keep a girl like that occupied? Could keep a sixteen year old girl distracted?" Her's eyes suddenly widened. "Aha! I know!"

I had already come to the same realization a few weeks earlier. "Very good dear. I already tried that. Unfortunately she's just not interested in boys right now."

"Pshaw, she's just pining for Haruki and Yuuki - those sketches prove it. The problem is that she is so busy fantasizing about her future husband and her guardian angel that she doesn't look at any other boy. I should know. I was just as lovesick as her once, even younger." That was true. When she twelve years old she became obsessed with finding John Smith. For her there was no one else. She had searched high and low for three years to try to find him.

"Kyon, all we need to do is get past her defenses. Get her involved with someone who won't make her put her guard up."

"Okay."

"And I know exactly who. He's perfect."

Could that be possible? Haruhi was a volunteer at the school and had met several of the students in Kyonko's class. "They are already friends. All we have to do is move things along a little bit faster."

I arched an eyebrow. "Hmm? You're scheming. That always scares me."

"You just don't understand women, Kyon." She grinned evilly.

Yes, definitely scary.

"So who is it, then?"

She described him.

I was incredulous. "You have got to be kidding me."

She grinned even more. "I know. That's why it's perfect."

"Are you serious?"

"It'll work, trust me."

I sighed. I had some real misgivings about it.

She rolled on top of me. "You know, talking about this stuff, it's turning me on."

Growl, talk about distractions. "We gotta be quiet."

"I will."

She wasn't.

And so we decided to put Haruhi's scheme into motion with some personal practice.

* * *

Haruhi had signed up as a teacher's aide volunteer at North High. She worked a couple days a week. At the next opportunity I tagged along with her and visited Kyonko's classroom, 3-1.

"So where are they?"

Haruhi gestured, "Over there."

I found them. Kyonko was sitting at a round table with three boys and another girl. They were working on some team project.

Two of the boys were seated on each side of Kyonko. The one on her left was a bishonen type, with spiked hair over his gray eyes and a pointed chin. The one on seated on her right was an otaku type, heavyset with black rimmed glasses. The girl was seated next to the bishonen. She was rather pretty with long blue hair that reminded me of Ryoko Asakura. The third boy was small and wore glasses and sat on the far side of the table. He sat apart because he was seated in a wheelchair. He had spiky brown hair and yellow-green eyes behind wireframe glasses. He seemed a bit younger than everyone else.

It took only a few seconds of observation for me to see the relationship dynamics. The otaku had an obvious interest in Kyonko and was trying to make conversation with her. The other girl was sharing a textbook with the bishonen; she was leaning in towards him. The boy in the wheelchair sat by himself watching the two pairs interact.

The otaku said something to Kyonko. She turned and gave him the you-are-an-idiot look and said something back. Then she got up and carried her chair around the table to sit next to the boy in the wheelchair. That boy was smiling. He said something to the otaku that I couldn't hear. Kyonko beamed at him and shifted her chair closer. Then the otaku threw down his pencil in disgust.

Haruhi gave me a bump. I leaned in and whispered, "Yeah, I see it. Good call."

She had told me everything earlier. The small boy's name was Akira Kurosawa; he shared the name of his great-grandfather, the famous film director. Four years ago the boy and his mother were in a horrific automobile accident. Both were ejected from the car. His spine was broken at T12, the base of the thoracic curvature just above the lumbar region. His mother was paralyzed in the cervical curvature at C5. She could move nothing below her neck except for her diaphragm and heartbeat.

Initially I had very serious misgivings about Haruhi's scheme. We needed to cheer Kyonko up, not get her involved with a boy with such a tragic past.

I looked at the round table. Kurosawa said something that seemed to take Kyonko by surprise. She gave a retort. Then they got into an animated debate. Suddenly they both stopped - they each grabbed their respective tablets and started flicking through them furiously. I heard the boy yell, "Got it here! I'm right!" Kyonko leaned over to look at his tablet, then she pushed off his shoulder in mock anger, conceeding defeat.

"Kyon, look. Her defenses are completely down, see? It's developing on its own."

I did see it. She was right.

The boy was 16, same as Kyonko, and a year younger than the other juniors. He had a reputation for being a bit mischievous, though I wondered how much a small boy in a wheelchair could do to wreak havoc. Apparently it was enough for him to be well known to the Vice Principal.

"Let's introduce you, shall we?" Haruhi escorted me over.

Kyonko seemed a bit startled. "Kyon, what are you doing here?"

"I just stopped by to check up on your teacher's aide here." I grinned at Haruhi. "And to see how you're doing."

"Oh, uh, we're fine. I mean I'm fine." She seemed nervous.

She tried to make introductions. "Uhm, Dad, this here is Akira Kurosawa. Kurosawa, this is Mr. Suzumiya, my father."

The boy smiled. "Please pardon me if I don't get up."

"Very nice to meet you. Hmm, your name sounds familiar."

"I get that a lot. You're thinking of my great-grandfather, the famous film director."

"Ah yes, Akira Kurosawa. I really enjoyed his films: _Ran_, _The Seven __Samurai_, _Rashomon_. He was a cinematic genius."

"Thank you. Which was your favorite film?"

"It's gotta be _Ran_. I saw it during a film festival in college seven years ago.

"Really? You were in college then? What age were you?"

Oops, crap. Math again. Uhm, let's see. Carry the 2..

Kyonko smacked him in the shoulder. She then glanced around to make sure the other three kids weren't listening. She leaned in and said, "He already figured out you're not my father. He won't tell anyone."

He grinned. "Sorry sir, just a bit of fun." He looked at Kyonko and decided to make amends. "We keep several film mementos at our home. You and your, uh, daughter should have dinner with us some day."

"Uh, thank you. We should do that sometime."

Yeah, they were two peas in a pod all right.

* * *

A few weeks later I got a call from the Vice Principal. He asked to see us regarding an incident with our daughter. He assured us she was not in any danger, however he needed to talk to one of us right away.

Haruhi folded her arms. "Gosh, Kyon. You're raising a delinquent. Who would have thought that of you?"

"Very funny. I'll handle it. Stay here with the twins."

I found Kyonko and Kurosawa in the outer office. Kurosawa's father was there.

Kyonko kicked Kurosawa's wheelchair and hissed at him, "You messed up the time delay!"

"Me? You overdid the pressure!"

"Did not! I kept it under 40 psi! The stupid specs were wrong!"

Hoo boy.

Before I could say anything the secretary buzzed us in to the VP's office.

The Vice Principal said, "Mr. Suzumiya, Mr. Kurosawa, I regret to inform you that your children have caused considerable disruption to this school."

"What happened?"

"All the toilets on the second floor exploded."

I bit my lip. "Really?"

Kyonko spoke up. "Just Mentos and Diet Coke. It should have been harmless. I guess the toilets were a little more fragile than we thought." She shot a dagger at Kurosawa.

The VP said, "Please be quiet. This is not the first time we've had of this kind of behavior with these two. The water damage was considerable this time. This kind of behavior cannot be tolerated."

Kyonko spoke up again. "Sir, I'm to blame for what happened. Not Kurosawa."

The Vice Principal said, "I'm sorry, but I cannot give Kurosawa any leniency in this matter. He is just as guilty as you are. I will not be lenient with him because of his physical condition. I'm afraid I am going to have to suspend both of you."

Afterwards I talked privately with Mr. Kurosawa.

I walked Kyonko home with me. She kicked a rock. "We wouldn't have gotten caught if he didn't flub the time delay."

"No, that's not the point. The VP is right. You shouldn't be doing that kind of crap."

"But it was fun."

"That kind of thing can get out of hand. You need to knock it off."

"Bored."

"Why don't you do something constructive for a change?"

"Like what?"

"Well, you have a week off of school now. Why don't you two do something together outside of school?"

"Such as?"

I acted nonchalant. "I don't know. Anything. Go out on a date or something."

"Huh?"

It was time to push things along. "Yes, young lady. A date."

"We're not like that."

"Actually, I think you are. You just haven't admitted it yet. You spend all your time with him in school. He's all you talk about at dinner."

"Kyon.."

"And you stopped drawing new sketches."

She stumbled and stopped. "So you know.."

"Yes. And what I know is _you_. You're already moving on, unconsciously. It's time to make it official."

"But.."

"I already talked to Kurosawa's father. He's totally on board."

"Dang it, Kyon. What is this, an arranged marriage? Get out of my life!"

I held her shoulders. "Look, you know me. I'd never force anything on you."

"I know.."

"It's time. I know it. You know it. We both know it."

Then she looked up at me. "Uhm, actually, Akira already asked me out once."

"Oh my. Yare yare. I'm getting the vapors." And she had just called him Akira, not Kurosawa.

"I've never been on one before, a date I mean."

"Please? Just this once?"

"Kyon.."

"Do it for me?"

She sighed. "Ok, fine. I'll do it. Happy now?"

I sobbed theatrically. "My dear little daughter is all grown up!"

She stuck out her tongue at me. "Well, I suppose it's time for me to go shopping then."

"Hmm?"

"Maybe Tsuruya can help me buy a dress or something."

I hugged her. "Yeah. I'm sure Haruhi will have some ideas too." We went home.

Inwardly I was overjoyed. The depression would end. I finally knew she was going to be all right.

What I didn't realize was that my meddling was the worst thing that I could have possibly done.


	8. Chapter 8: Beam Me Up, Scotty

**A/N:**

Please give me reviews! I admit I am playing around a lot in this story, with mind screw and lots of humor, but I am deadly serious about the philosophical arguments that I am trying to make. Please critique. It will help me to fix them and make them better.

I plan to punch up the raunchiness of the sex scenes between Haruhi and Kyon a bit. Haruhi is always pretty wild, and I chuckle when I think of how even more uninhibited she would get if she got married. The story will remain rated 'T' because it won't go beyond the innuendo of a light romance novel, and they _are_ married.

For example, I plan to insert one particular scene (in a much later chapter) with Haruhi getting overly enthusiastic with Kyon in bed. Our heroine catches them, and she asks Kyon a question about what was going on. It has me absolutely rolling on the floor in stitches. It's so funny I gotta spill it now. You can find the scene, inserted as a sneak preview, after main the preview for Chapter 11.

I have reworked some of earlier heavier chapters (2, 4, 5). Please read them again before critiquing them.

Chapter 9 is coming up. It is a huge wham chapter. I am going to play one of my ace cards. Click on 'Follow Story' and get ready for it.

I have great trepidations about Chapter 10. It's the hardest philosophical argument that I have ever tackled, at least in public writing. I've been wrestling with it for weeks. I've discussed it and shown the beta in private to some people that I greatly respect. It is very deep and complex.

I plan to butt my head hard against a world famous and highly respected philosopher. I am going attack him head on, and I admit that I might be biting off more than I can chew. I have never seen anyone take the philosophical approach I plan to use, at least that I am aware of. It makes me more than a little nervous that I might be screwing it up. I'm still not satisfied with it.

It is possible that I might yell 'Banzai' and go for it anyway, logical holes and all. I am a bit tempted to maybe even use a certain rhetorical trick, but I hate it when other writers cheat like that. That famous philosopher used it, and I plan to bust him for it. (He is cheating.) It would be hypocritical of me to use the same trick. I want to play fair with you. I might back off and try another tack. I'm not sure yet, and I really want to give the atheists on the other side of the argument a fair shake. Many hard-core atheistic writers use straw arguments or sloppy thinking in their God-bashing polemics. (The amount of lazy scholarship going on at most liberal arts colleges today is depressing.) You'll know what I'm wrestling with when you see Chapter 9.

* * *

**Chapter 8: Beam Me Up, Scotty**

Kyonko's big date was scheduled for Friday night. She had disappeared with Haruhi and Tsuruya. I didn't see her for a couple days.

On Friday evening I made it a point to loiter around near front door. Kyonko was busy getting ready upstairs. I still hadn't seen her.

Haruhi came down first. She covered my eyes. Then she called out to Kyonko, "Ok, come down."

She uncovered my eyes. Kyonko did a twirl. "Well, what do you think?"

I was stunned. She was wearing one of Haruhi's old dresses. It was a dainty yellow and orange number that Haruhi often wore during our special outings back in our college days. I remembered that particular dress very well. One night I had lost my virginity to the person wearing it.

The overall effect has amazing. Kyonko looked _really_ nice. The dress and high-heels made her look willowy. She wore blush and lipstick. The eyeliner really highlighted her eyes well. Dang, she probably rated A- or A on the Taniguchi scale.

"My my, Haruhi, you've outdone yourself."

"Thanks. You need to thank Tsuruya too. She was a big help."

Then I noticed her bustline. I raised an eyebrow. Haruhi and Kyonko were very different in their upper body proportions. Kyonko had filled out a little bit, but nothing like _that_.

Kyonko hiked up the dress top in a very unlady-like manner. "Sock balls."

"Oh."

There was a knock on the door. Kurosawa was here. His hair was combed over and he looked like a penguin. He looked clearly uncomfortable.

I kissed my daughter's cheek. "Don't stay out too late."

"Don't worry, we won't."

They left.

* * *

Not an hour later I heard the door slam. I put on my robe and went downstairs. Kyonko had let herself in with the key. She was a mess. She was carrying her shoes barefoot, her dress was covered in mud, her hair was badly disheveled, and she had a T-shirt pulled down over her dress top.

I bit my lip to avoid smirking. It was like an episode right out of the TV show _Friends_. "So, uh, the date not go so well?"

Her eye was twitching. "Everything. Went. Wrong."

"So sorry."

"On the way to the restaurant my stupid heel broke. I fell right into his lap."

I bit my lip harder. "Oh dear."

"When I tried to extricate myself, my dress got caught on his chair and both straps snapped."

"Oh my."

"So the sock balls came out."

"Ah."

"Then I fell into the mud."

"I see."

"And then, when he tried to help me up, his wheelchair ran over my foot.

"Ouch."

"Somehow the brake got locked. So I tried to push the chair off me. It tipped over. He went into the mud too."

"Oh my. So very sorry."

Must.. not.. laugh.. must.. not..

"This was _your_ idea, Kyon. Stop smirking."

"I'm not." My lip was going to draw blood.

"He loaned me his sweaty T-shirt to avoid me flashing everyone."

"Mmmph.."

"Not that I have much to flash, mind you."

I lost it.

"Yeah, laugh it up. I hope there's a special place in hell for someone like you, Kyon."

"I'm really sorry."

"We made a promise to each other. We are never dating again. With anyone. Ever again."

"Let's clean you up. I'll draw a bath for you."

"Ever."

"No dates. Probably a good idea."

"Ever!"

"I hear you."

"EVER!"

"Let's get you upstairs."

"EEEVEER!"

* * *

Two weeks after the dating disaster, I got a call from Yuki Nagato. She informed me that the Data Integration Thought Entity had discovered a possible solution for what she called the "data definition problem" regarding how to send Kyonko back to Haruki's world. I wasn't sure what that phrase meant, but it sounded very promising.

Kyonko insisted that Kurosawa come with us, so we picked him up along the way to Nagato's apartment.

Before we entered the elevator, Kyonko pulled me aside. "Kyon, there's something you should know before we talk to Yuki."

"Hmm?"

"If she finds a way to send me home, Akira is coming with me."

I was stunned. "What?"

"We talked it over. We're both going."

"You're serious."

Kurosawa spoke up. "Yes, Kyon. I can help her. Deal with Haruki, I mean. Kyonko will get him to recruit me into the Brigade."

Oh, that's just great. Those two lovebirds were obviously not thinking with their heads. If Haruki ever got wind of them making goo-goo eyes at each other, all hell would break loose. I mean literally. Actually it would be worse than that.

I didn't want to fight that particular battle at that moment. "Yeah, fine, whatever. We can talk about this later." We went up to apartment 708.

We went inside. Kurosawa was awed when he saw Nagato. "Wow, an android?"

"More like an alien. She's an ambassador from a vast group intelligence, a very alien alien."

"Wow."

We sat around table in the main room with our tea and waited for Nagato to begin.

After introductions she said, "The child should not be here." Yuki's expression didn't change, but I could tell that she was clearly unhappy to see him.

Kyonko spoke up, "I can vouch for him." I nodded as well.

"That is not the problem." She did not elaborate further.

She then moved on to the main topic of discussion. "The Data Integration Thought Entity has determined a possible way to mitigate the multiverse collapse."

"Really? That's wonderful."

"It took considerable analysis with hierarchical algorithms and entropy simulation."

"So there's a way?" I knew that if anyone could find a way to send Kyonko home it would be Yuki.

"There are still many unknown factors. Additional data and analysis are required. It has never been attempted before. The probability of success cannot be quantified."

Still, it was the best news I heard in a long time. Kyonko jumped. "Woo!" The boy also cheered. The lovebirds hugged each other.

Yuki's expression didn't change, but I could tell she was still annoyed about the boy being there. I had half a mind to throw those two in the side room and let them get it on. At least that way I could talk to Yuki in peace.

Yuki looked directly at me. "The Data Integration Thought Entity thanks you, Kyon."

"What? Why?"

"Without you it would not have been possible. You created this opportunity."

"What the heck did I do?"

"You threatened the Data Integration Thought Entity with its extinction."

"Oh, uh, yeah, I guess I did."

Kurosawa chuckled. "Wow, Kyon, I didn't know you were such a badass."

"Shut up."

Yuki was right. Back on that awful December 18th she had gone critically unstable. On 4:18 AM of that day she completely lost it. She stole Haruhi's reality-warping powers and literally changed the universe. In her madness she had transformed herself into a human, and she had and transformed Haruhi into a normal girl with no powers and put her in another school.

Yuki had gone insane. At the time she didn't even understand her own motives, about why she did it. Later we figured it out. She did it because she was falling in love with me and didn't realize it.

As punishment the Data Integration Thought Entity was going to recall Yuki Nagato from Earth assignment and put her trial for her life. I knew she would be convicted. The DITE would have then probably then erased her. She had committed a terrible crime by stealing Haruhi's powers. And she was still unstable, a danger to everything and everyone in existence.

I became furious with the DITE. I said that if the DITE took Yuki away and harmed her, I would whip up Haruhi into a frenzy. I would take Haruhi with me, leave Earth, and launch a quest across the heavens, across the whole universe if necessary, to find her, rescue her, and bring her back. And I said that if necessary I would maneuver Haruhi into using her reality-warping powers to transform the universe so that Yuki existed and the DITE did not. I basically threatened to kill it.

The DITE backed off. After that I spent many days alone with Yuki in her apartment. We talked and worked things out. Then she had her epiphany. She became stable again. The crisis was averted.

The crisis wasn't her fault. She was trapped. She was repeating the same two weeks over an over during the Endless Summer. It had gone on for thousands of iterations, for over 500 years. Although for the rest of the Brigade it was only a vague feeling of deja-vu, it wasn't for her. She remembered each iteration, everything. It was slowly driving her insane. During each iteration I could sense something was wrong with her. Each time around I asked her about it. Everyone else took her for granted. I was the only member of the Brigade that cared. During each iteration she clung to my words like a life raft. Then somehow, over the centuries, she had started to develop unconscious feelings for me.

After the crisis I had admitted that I had depended on her too much. I had resolved not to do that from now on.

"Ok Yuki, so what did the Data Integration Thought Entity do?"

"To defend itself from your threat of extinction, the Data Integration Thought Entity prepared backups. Backups of itself. It also backed up portions of some other critical data as well."

"Good!" I was a computer guy. I knew the importance of keeping good backups. You'd be amazed how many idiots put their whole life into their PC without backing it up regularly.

"But the backups are only raw data, passive, not active. And they are not complete."

"Why?"

"As I explained before, the Data Integration Thought Entity _is_ the universe. It is not able to back up so much data within the same system, even with maximum compression."

"I see."

"And much of the data is.. uninteresting. There are vast voids of empty space that separate a billion light years between galactic superclusters. And there is much tedious repetition at lower levels, with only minor variations."

"So the backup is only partial."

"Yes. The Data Integration Thought Entity preserved only data that it believed was interesting. One such datum was Haruki's world. Just the planet. The surrounding interstellar and galactic material structures are only basic constructs, not fully realized."

I guess that made sense. You back up the stuff you think is important.

"That is a reason for much of the difficulty. A restoration might not be possible. The Data Integration Thought Entity has applied considerable resources into the analysis of the problem."

"What problem? I don't understand. Why not just restore Haruki's world by itself?"

"The Data Integration Thought Entity has so far identified at least two serious problems."

"Which are?"

"The first problem is that the Data Integration Thought Entity can only restore data into the original universe it was created from."

Kyonko spoke up. "I get it. It is like replacing a missing puzzle piece. You find the empty hole, then you push the puzzle piece into it."

"Yes."

Then Kurosawa chimed in. "And that's the problem, right? It isn't that a just piece is missing. The problem is that the entire puzzle is missing, the whole universe. So there is no way to snap in a single replacement piece anywhere."

Yuki paused a second. She was re-evaluating the kid. Maybe he's not such a nuisance after all. "Correct."

I interrupted them. I saw a much bigger problem.

"Wait, Haruki would still be dead, right? I mean, this is just a backup copy. Not the primary. Not the original Haruki."

Yuki looked at me. "What is 'primary'? Everything is data. Two copies of the same data are indistinguishable. They are the same."

"Uh, no, you don't get it. Haruki died. It's not the same guy. He's still dead. Your guy is a clone. We humans have this concept called a soul."

She waited. The two delinquents just looked at me and said nothing. I had to tackle this one on my own.

"Uhm, let me try to explain this. Ok, here's an analogy. Let's pretend that you have a mind transfer machine. You know, a machine like that one in the movie _Young Frankenstein_. Say that you zapped my mind into Frankenstein, and you swapped his mind into mine."

She didn't react so I kept going.

"Ok, now you pick up a gun. You shoot me, my body I mean. I'm dead. So here's the question: Who is left alive now?"

"You."

"No! I died. My body died. That's just a copy, a replica."

"No. It is the same."

"No it is not! I died. Someone else is taking my place. If I was in heaven I'd probably be pretty pissed off about it."

"I do not understand."

Kyonko finally spoke up in my defense. "You're saying it is not the same 'you'. It's a different person."

"Yeah. Thanks for finally helping me out here."

"I'm sorry, Kyon. I want to help you, but I'm not saying that I agree with you. In fact I think I don't."

"Aw c'mon!" I pounded my chest. "This is _me_. This stuff right here. These atoms that make up my body, my brain, are _me_. If you shoot my brain I'm dead. If you can somehow magically recreate a new brain, and give it the same neurons, the same interconnections, it's just a clone. It looks like me, talks like me, walks like me, quacks like me, but it is not _me_. It is a different duck!"

Yuki was being patient with me. "Kyon, that is not logical. Your 'clone', as you call it, is made of exactly the same data. Therefore it is the same. Two copies of the same data are indistinguishable."

Kurosawa leaned into Kyonko and whispered, "He's a materialist."

I overheard him. "Dang right I am! If you shoot me in the head, I'm dead. Forever. My soul, or whatever you want to call it, is kaput."

I was getting worked up. "Look, I don't believe in heaven. I only believe in what I can see. And even if I did believe in it, I am pretty sure that I would be pretty pissed off when I looked down from my fluffy white cloud. I mean, down there is some other guy, some imposter jerk, down there pretending to be me, taking my place!"

Kyonko leaned in my direction. "Kyon, I'm sorry but you're view is simplistic. If you are trying base your identity, your 'you', solely on the basis of your physical body, it won't work."

I banged my chest again. "Yes it does! This is my body, my stuff, this is me!"

"You really think so?"

"Well, yeah!"

Kurosawa was shaking his head.

Oh that's just great. Those two delinquent wonderbrats were ganging up on me. I didn't care. I was determined to fight this one to the bitter end.

I crossed my arms. "I'm not changing my mind on this."

I wasn't bothered by Yuki's view. To her everything is data. It was only natural for her assume that duplicate data was indistinguishable. And there was no way to reconcile her viewpoint with mine. And I was cool with that - would we just have to agree to disagree.

It was the wonderbrats that annoyed me. They weren't helping me at all. Although Kyonko looked at me sympathetically.

Then one of them demolished my view like a house of cards. It took me by complete surprise.

It wasn't the wonderbrats. It was Yuki.

"Kyon, every atom, every molecule in your physical brain, is replaced approximately every three years through metabolism and waste elimination."

"What?"

"Yes. It is true."

"Huh?"

Kurosawa giggled. "She means your brain gets flushed down the toilet every three years."

"You're kidding."

Yuki continued to blast away my argument. "Yes. It's replaced. Completely. The physical 'stuff' of your brain, as you call it, is gone. So where is the 'you' now? Where is your 'soul', so to speak?"

I admitted I didn't know.

"It is data combined with an actualizer. It is your DNA coding sequence combined with the enumeration of your neural connections between your axons and synapses. Then it is actualized. All within the system. You understand?"

I didn't.

Kyonko explained. "You see what she is saying? By 'actualized' she means the analogy with the phonograph and the record player. You remember that? Think of the record player as the atoms in your physical body. Your body is 'playing' that data, those neural interconnections that create your mind, that create the being that you call 'you'.

Kurosawa caught on. "And that dance of chemical receptors and electrical energy is the actualizer, your physical body playing the song, right?"

Kyonko said, "You got it!"

It kind of made sense, I guess. But I still resisted.

And someone was watching it all happen. The Higher Power that had created the sim that ran everything.

She said, "He's so smart, don't you think?" She pinched his cheek. He flinched. "Stop that!"

I knew that the Kanji for the name 'Akira' meant 'bright' or 'intelligent'. It was gender neutral. She smiled at her paramour and said, "You know, I think I'll keep him."

I was getting nauseous. "Do you mind if we get back to business here? Otherwise there's a nice kingsize bed in the other room. I've tried it."

"Stop embarrassing me."

"You've tried it too." She did with Yuuki once, although nothing actually happened. She started to blush. I was being unfair to her. It was because I was getting annoyed.

To his credit, Kurosawa was the one who got back on topic. "Let me try to explain what Yuki is saying." He used an analogy. "You remember _Star Trek_, the transporter on that TV show?"

"Uh, yeah.."

"You remember Leonard 'Bones' McCoy, the ship's doctor? He always hated the transporter. He called it 'that infernal contraption that's always flinging my atoms all over the place'. The transporter converted matter to energy, transmitted it, and then converted the energy back into matter."

"Yeah. He really hated that thing."

"Right. Well, you are like McCoy. The transporter is actually just transmitting _data_, along with the raw energy to reassemble it back into matter. The atoms in the source pad were destroyed and turned into pure raw energy. It's Einstein's basic equation, E equals m c squared. Then on the planet the transporter ran the equation backwards to create different atoms, new atoms, in the same configuration using that raw energy. But the energy itself is always fluid, undifferentiated."

"So you are saying they weren't the same atoms?"

"That's right. So in McCoy's view the transporter killed him. Then it created a clone of him on the planet surface. That's your view too, Kyon."

"I guess so.."

Kyonko chimed in. "Don't you see? Yuki is saying was that it doesn't matter. Your identity is tied to your data, not the particular atoms in your body. In her view you are just transported. It is still the same 'you'."

"Wait. So, let's say you cloned me somehow, and you copied my mind too. You copied it exactly. Now tell me, what happens? Are there two of 'me' now? I mean, two souls?"

"Yes Kyon. There would now be two of 'you'."

This was nuts.

She went on. "But as soon as that happens they diverge. Each clone has a different experience. The neural configuration changes. They quickly become two separate people."

"You mean their, uh, souls, split?"

"That is semantics. But I believe that the answer would be yes."

Wow. I need to tell McCoy about that. Version 342 that is.

I remembered an episode of _Star Trek _where the transporter malfunctioned. It beamed up two copies of Kirk, the good Kirk and the evil Kirk. So they were in fact two entirely separate people. They both had unique identities. Unique 'souls' in my point of view. And when Scotty fixed the transporter to re-merge the two halves, the normal Kirk popped out. It was the same soul as the original.

I understood. The soul and the body were separate. They weren't the same. I remembered that French philosopher, that René Descartes guy. The guy who said 'I think, therefore I am.' He believed in, what was it, oh yeah, Cartesian Dualism. That was it. Dualism. The soul and the body are separate entities.

So your body could die but your soul could remain.

Hmm.. so in a sense maybe Yuuki really did go to Heaven after all? I mean, if his data was reconstituted into a new body. Maybe at that higher level. Or maybe his Creator would then inject him into a new reality down at our level. Let's call that Heaven, or Paradise, or Elysium, or the Happy Hunting Grounds, or whatever.

I wish my Creator would give me a new body. My back always hurts.

"Ok guys.. I'm starting to track you. So the 'backup copy' is just as real as the original."

I waited for Yuki to say "Yes".

But she didn't.

"No, Kyon."

Wait, what? Dang it. I thought I was beginning to understand. What the heck is she trying to say now? She threw me off again.

"Not in this case. There are serious problems."

"Which are?"

"First, the backup must be the same. In this case it is not."

"Oh?"

"The image was taken approximately one year prior to the Great Ending."

Ugh. That meant any events that happened during the past year would have been lost. Dang it, in Kyonko's world the SOS Brigade wasn't even that old! She would have to start all over!

"Blast it, Yuki! Doesn't the Entity know the importance of making frequent backups? It's basic rule number one in computer tech! Even I know that!" You won't believe how many of my clients forget to back up their websites.

"I'm sorry, Kyon. Backups of that type are very difficult to create. There is only one."

Phooey. So if we somehow re-injected Kyonko back into Haruki's world, she would have to start everything over again: Meet Haruki, almost get decapitated by Ryou Asakura and his katana, go back in time three years and draw the Nazca lines again, and undergo Haruki's terrible physical abuse again.

Or maybe not all of that. We could anticipate and prevent some of it the second time around. That would help her avoid a lot of mental and physical trauma.

"Ok, fine. So what are the other problems then?"

"First, as I have already explained, the Entity does not know how to re-insert the backup data without also having the original universe for the insertion."

"So make another universe. Then stick Haruki in there."

"No Kyon. We cannot create data. I have explained this before."

"Oh yeah.. I forgot."

She was right. She had informed me the very first time I met her in this very apartment. She told me that only very special persons, people who were reality-warpers like like Haruhi, could literally 'create data' out of nothing. It was something the Entity could not do. It was the primary reason why the Entity was so fascinated with Haruhi.

I sighed. "And the other problem?"

"I'm sorry Kyon. The Entity does not have the data anymore."

All three of us blurted, "What!?"

"You don't have the freaking backup!?"

"No."

Then there were groans all around the table.

"Why the heck not?"

"I am sorry Kyon. It is your fault."

"What?"

"I have already explained. You had threatened to erase the Data Integration Thought Entity."

"So..?"

"If the backup was stored with the Entity, you might have erased it also."

I was thinking. "Oh, I get it. You made an off-site backup. Good. That's standard procedure." I knew that from my computer work. Major corporations would often store critical backup data far away from their main data centers. Often the off-site storage depot would be located in another state or even in another country. That way a major natural disaster wouldn't wipe them out.

"Ok. So who has the backup, then?"

She paused. She didn't want to say.

"Well?"

".. The Sky Canopy Dominion."

"You are [bleep] kidding me."

For the first time that day, Kurosawa got left behind. "Sky Canopy Dominion? What's that?"

I sighed. "Major bad guys. The Entity's biggest enemy. Why in heaven's name did you give it to them? Are you crazy?"

"The Sky Canopy Dominion is the only other entity that is powerful enough and has sufficient capacity to store and maintain that much backup data."

"So ask for it back then."

"Kyon, the Data Integration Thought Entity has only very limited communication with the Sky Canopy Dominion. The Sky Canopy Dominion is currently not responding. The Entity does not know why."

"Great, another problem, huh? This is starting to get annoying."

"I am sorry. You will need to locate and retrieve the data for the Entity."

"What?"

"You must locate and retrieve the data yourself."

"But.."

"It is not on Earth. You will need to locate it. You are the only one who can retrieve it."

Kurosawa would have jumped out of his chair if he could. "Banzai! Space quest!"

Oh great. We get to go on another trip out of town. Waaaay out of town.

Yuki went back to get some more tea. The wonderbrats were overjoyed. They started whispering and snuggling. Sigh.

As I waited for her to return and discuss our pending trip, my mind wandered. I knew now there was real hope for Kyonko. But Kurosawa was going to be a big problem, especially for my younger brother. Should I tell either of them? Naw, they can figure it out on their own.

Hmm, Haruhi would have to come with us. Koizumi was a nut about this stuff, he would insist on coming too. I wasn't sure about Asahina.

I'd have to explain everything to Haruhi. Nagato had used some mental hypnotic technique on her to block her powers. She had promised she would never use her powers again. She might have to break that promise to me. Given the circumstances I felt that it was okay.

We'd need someone to take care of the twins while we were gone. I'll ask Haruhi about it. Maybe Tsuruya would volunteer. I didn't worry about the two delinquents being truant from school. If this crazy plan worked, then they would never return to that school. In fact their existence would be erased from my world, so it would be moot anyway.

I would forget the past eight months with Kyonko completely. It would be like it never happened. Yuki would remember, and she would re-inform me, but I would no longer have any first-hand memory of my younger sister. That depressed me. We'll probably spend a year together before this is over. It occurred to me that during this year together I really was her father. It hit me hard.

I would forget Kurosawa too. I wondered how the boy's parents would change with their never having a child. Would the car accident still happen? Probably, but only with Mrs. Kurosawa being paralyzed. Wait, would the car trip have even taken place? Maybe the trip was an errand for the boy, so it wouldn't happen and the mother would be fine? I should ask.

We were all gabbing excitedly about the upcoming trip, while Yuki returned with more tea.

I didn't realize it yet, but there was an even bigger problem. One not yet foreseen. There was another enemy out there. It was an enemy that was far worse than the Sky Canopy Dominion. An enemy that was truly evil.

We didn't learn about it until later, when it was too late. I had never seen true evil before. Not up close. During this quest I would.

And it would change our lives forever.


	9. Chapter 9: The Battle of a Hero

**Chapter 9: The Battle of a Hero**

Yuki brought out more tea and sat down with us again.

"I am sorry, Kyon. The Data Integration Thought Entity is not permitted to directly interfere with the Sky Canopy Dominion. However, I will volunteer to go with you on your mission. I will assist you as much as I can. However, please understand that I also cannot directly interfere with the Sky Canopy Dominion. Only you can do that."

"Thanks a million, Yuki. I mean it. We already depend on you so much." Too much, I thought. "So what are we looking for, exactly?"

"It is a 10-dimensional hypersphere. In the three spatial dimensions it appears as a perfect sphere, crystalline, approximately 5 centimeters in diameter."

"That small?"

"Yes. The data is highly compressed and passive. It is not actualized. Most of the data is stored in the higher dimensions."

"So where is it? Off planet, right?"

"Yes. The Entity is unsure of its exact location. It has some possible spatial locations identified probabilistically."

"Ok, can we see it?"

Yuki waved her arm vertically. A floating holographic image appeared in front of us.

It as an image of our own galaxy, the Milky Way, a barred spiral with graceful arms. The view was at a right angle to the floor, facing us. It was quite beautiful.

I walked closer to it. Kyonko came around the table also looked, standing about 3 meters behind me. Kurosawa stayed behind the table. From his viewing angle it was edge on, a thin vertical line of stars with a central bulge.

I turned and asked Yuki, "Hey, this is our own galaxy, right?"

"Yes."

I noticed a small blinking dot on the image, located about three-fifths of the way down from the central mass. There was a small annotation in Kanji, _You are here_.

I saw other nearby labels in Katakana: _Orion Spur, Orion Arm_. The outer spiral arm was labeled _Perseus Arm_.

This was very good. Apparently, the Entity believed that the hypersphere was located somewhere in our local neighborhood, in our own galaxy. That eliminated what must be like 99.99999% of it the possible search area, the entire universe. Very good indeed.

Yuki then made a horizontal motion of her arm. The galactic image was then overlayed with a color data layer that had two oval-shaped colored rings. Working outwards the rings were colored yellow and green. Outside that was a soft blue color that ran all the way out to the very edges of the whole image. The central mass of the galaxy was a red ellipse. At the bottom I saw a floating legend, _Zonographic Map. Not normative. Estimate based on last survey._

The borders on both sides of the two colored oval rings were somewhat jaggy, with little crinkly spurs and divots. On a large scale the contours seemed to follow the density of the stars that region. The Milky Way was a barred spiral, and the contours followed that. I looked closer. The borders were very crinkly, recusing with tiny squiggles down to the smallest detail. It reminded me of a computer generated image of the famous Mandelbrot Set, or its sisters, called the Julia Sets, all with their twisty edges recursing down, smaller and smaller, down to the infinitely small.

Some new floating labels appeared. Working outwards, the colored rings were labeled as follows: _Slow Zone, Beyond, Transcend_. The inner red elliptical area around the central bar had a weird label, _Unthinking Depths_. Huh? What did that mean?

Then Yuki applied her hand again and two more colored partial overlays appeared. Both were faint. One was misty white and seemed to be everywhere, except in the red area where it was completely missing.

The white mist was dim within the yellow ring, a bit brighter within the green ring, and bright in some sections of the outer blue region. It was particularly bright in a pie-shaped wedge running out from the yellow and green up through the top side of the image, opposite the Orion and Perseus arms. The white mist was fainter in the bottom pie wedge, where Earth was located.

The legend read, _Data Integration Thought Entity_.

I knew the DITE was literally everywhere, spanning across the whole universe. I was looking at its layout in our own local neighborhood. I was a bit surprised how weak it looked near Earth. Maybe it was trying to stay our of Haruhi's way. I knew it was scared of her. And with good reason.

Actually, now that I think about it, the Entity was probably scared of me too. I mean, ever since I threatened to kill it.

Yeah, the DITE was definitely trying to stay out of our way.

I wondered how the DITE felt about Kyonko. I mean, she's never been scary around me, not even remotely so. I think I will ask Yuki about it later, in private.

Actually, at a later time, I would definitely learn the answer to that particular question, and not from Yuki.

Kyonko says I'm a badass, a big damn hero. Ok, not really. She's joking. Basically I'm a coward and she knows it. She was always far braver than I am. I thought it might be because of her gender, as women can be far braver than men in certain circumstances. And I think that her 'spirited away' experience at age 10, which I did not have, was probably also a big factor. I mean, after that amazing experience she was no longer scared of, well, anything really.

Kyonko took a step closer to the hologram, now standing two meters behind me and to the right. She was watching everything. Kurosawa stayed where he was. I think he was being respectful. It was a nice gesture, I thought.

The second misty overlay was purplish. The legend read, _Sky Canopy Dominion_. The purple mist ran in several short bright arcs, mostly in the bottom half of the image. The purple arcs were faint in the yellow ring, brighter in the green, and neon bright in some small patchy areas in the blue.

I noticed there was no purple mist at the dot, _You are here_. Good, Earth wasn't inside the Dominion. But a lot of the Sky Canopy Dominion's turf was nearby. A lot closer than the DITE's. Not so good.

The Sky Canopy Domain physically possessed the hypersphere. They had it. That meant it was very likely located somewhere in the purple mist region. The search area was now narrowed down to less than 5% of our galaxy.

So far we were making very good progress, but we still had a long way to go to narrow it down to a reasonable search area.

Kyonko spoke up, "It looks like the dot, the you-are-here dot, is within this yellow elliptical ring labeled 'Slow Zone'. What does that label mean exactly?"

Yuki said, "The Slow Zone is a region of space where most conventional forms of faster-than-light travel are not possible."

Hey! I spoke up. "You mean the USS Enterprise can't even go warp 1 in our neck of the woods?"

Yuki understood my slang, "No Kyon, it cannot."

"Hey, that sucks.. I mean, we don't get to have a fun _Star Trek_ future? Aw man.."

Kyonko got annoyed, "Kyon, please be quiet."

She looked back at Yuki, "Can you please explain why the Slow Zone prevents FTL travel?"

"It is due to the relative mass density of the dark matter in that region of space. Higher densities of dark matter create fundamental instabilities in the operation of higher order complex systems, including all known conventional FTL space warp devices and mechanisms."

"High order complex systems.. Hmm, so you include complex systems such as yourself? How do you function down here?"

"I am a Humanoid Entity. I am designed to operate as efficiently as possible in this region of space. I admit that it does limit my potential capabilities. I become more efficient as the zonographic density of dark matter decreases in the region of space that I occupy. In the Transcend, I can become transcendent myself, if the Data Integration Thought Entity has local density sufficient to establish a quantum channel with me. But it is dangerous, and I can operate at that level for only a short time before I self destruct."

Kyonko said, "Transcendent? What does that mean?"

"Transcendent algorithms and systems can operate at very high speeds. They have direct access to higher dimensions that are normally inaccessible at higher dark matter mass density levels. This allows for extraordinary, almost unlimited, data transmission capacity."

"And the Beyond is an intermediate level that allows FTL but not transcendence. Okay, I get it. What about the 'Unthinking Depths'?"

"That is a region of high dark matter density. Even basic sentience is not possible in this region of space. This includes the higher cognitive functions of the human brain. In the galactic center only minimal limbic and regulatory systems would be functional."

I was totally lost at this point. "Uhm, can I please have the Japanese translation everything that you just said?"

Kyonko translated for me, "It means you get more retarded the closer you travel to the center of the galaxy, and you get smarter the further you get away from it. I mean, at least up to your potential." She grinned at me, "I'd probably get a little smarter, but I have some doubts about you, Kyon."

"Very funny."

Yuki said, "That is correct."

I glared at Yuki and shouted, "Hey! That was a cheap shot!"

"It is literally true, but only by a negligible factor. I could not resist making the statement. I apologize."

Dang it, she's getting playful again. That means she's feeling a little giddy. Ugh, Kyonko was right. We gotta find a way to keep her stable without my having to violate my vows to my wife.

"Yuki, just calm down. Please. Just answer Kyonko's questions."

"My remark was inappropriate. I apologize again. Do not be concerned. I am now fully stable."

"Suuure you are." Oops, I shouldn't have said that.

"Kyon, that is an inappropriate retort for you to make to me. I believe that I feel... hurt."

Yeah, she's definitely a little wobbly. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry, really. I didn't mean it. I wasn't thinking. Sorry, please just go on."

I began to wonder how the higher Zones of Thought would affect her stability.

Yuki resumed her explanation of the situation, "Although there is a differentially continuous gradient within these regions, the zonographic boundaries can cause discontinuities in cognitive abilities. These bounaries can be dangerous if they are not carefully mapped using zonographic survey craft. Unfortunately the Data Integration Thought Entity does not have normative data for the boundaries in many sectors of the galaxy.

Kyonko's eyes were gleaming, "This is really fascinating stuff, Nagato. I had no idea the galaxy worked this way."

"There was no reason for me to disclose it before this time."

"Ok, fine. Got it. So, what is the next step to find this hypersphere?"

Yuki spoke. "The Entity has transmitted a broadcast message to all of the compatible advanced interstellar races living within the Local Group to request transportation assistance for you."

I said soothingly, "Yuki, that is very nice. We really appreciate it." I was trying to keep her calm.

Kyonko scratched her head, "Wait, I don't get it. What about a hyperspace conduit? A hyperspace conduit operates transdimensionally, right? All these zone speed limits don't even apply. So why don't you just create a hyperspace conduit and zap us around? And why the big call for help?"

Yuki explained, "The use of hyperspace conduits for intra-universe travel is possible, but it is not recommended. The energy requirement for that type of transportation is very large. It requires the destruction of several solar systems per jump. There is a high probability that on this mission that you will make numerous jumps during your search. It would be.. wasteful."

Yeah, she was right. I said, "Ok, we understand."

Kyonko spoke up again, "Ok fine. But why can't you just get us there yourself by some other way? I mean, some fancy FTL hocus pocus that you smart entities know? I know it exists. I know because you teleported yourself to Earth from a very long distance when you first arrived. So there is a way, right? So why not just use that method?"

"There are two reasons. The first reason is that our kind does not use physical kinematics for transport."

That made sense. She was literally data. Her body was a biologically living cyborg shell with a titanium and molybdenum bone structure. I bet her body was reconstituted each time that the DITE beamed her data, that is, the pure information that constituted her existence, to a new planet. Or if she travelled in time. It probably worked the like the _Star Trek_ transporter or something.

She hadn't done either one since she came to Earth 16 years ago. Maybe she didn't like it, I mean her body getting recreated each time. I knew for fact that she particularly disliked time travel. I was not sure why.

"The second reason is that Data Integration Thought Entity is not permitted to directly interact with, or interfere with, the Sky Canopy Domain."

That might be some kind of cosmic rule or something.

Kurosawa was still respectfully staying quiet and out of the way. Nice boy. Kyonko and I continued to conduct our business with Yuki.

I said, "So how are you going to shuttle us around the galaxy?"

"As I have already explained, the Entity has transmitted a broadcast a message requesting travel assistance. So far, fifteen races with suitable FTL travel capability have responded."

Fifteen races? Wow. A lot of alien folks must like the DITE. And it sounded like our region of space was indeed like the on the TV show _Star Trek_, with lots of inhabited alien solar systems in the neighborhood, most of them apparently friendly.

Kyonko wasn't finished. "Wait, we are in the Slow Zone. How are they getting here?"

"It is simple. We transmitted the message back in time."

"Oooh.."

Yuki continued, "The Entity has transmitted to each of the fifteen races the full details of the mission, the tactical and strategic requirements, the risk probability estimates, and the full specifications of your race. So far, five of the fifteen races have volunteered to help you. The Entity believes that four of the volunteer races are suitable. One is not."

"Wow, thanks, Yuki. You are a trooper."

She said nothing and waited.

Kyonko said, "Ok.. now, Nagato, please let me ask you, if I can, which of the four suitable candidates would you recommend? I mean, which one would you recommend if you were us? Which should we pick?"

"I cannot. That is for you to decide. With Kyon. You must agree."

I noticed that she omitted Kurosawa's name.

She continued, "There are.. intangible factors. You and Kyon must judge for yourselves."

I understood. By 'intangible factors' she meant human nature: Intuition, emotion, feeling. She was asking Kyonko and I to make a gut call.

Kyonko said, "Ok, let's do it. Show us candidate one, please."

Yuki did.

The image of the galaxy disappeared. It was replaced with pictures and body diagrams of an alien race. The aliens looked to me like a bunch of humanoid butterflies. Along the button was scrolling text,

_Species/ID/Name: Aprahant Hegemony. Medians: Intel 4.7/Tac 7.0+/Strat 4.5-/Tech 7.5+; Ethic A/F (bistable), Govern/philo: Republic/Jacksonian (caste based) Warning bistable aggressive (0.4-/9.2+)_

Other stuff scrolled by. Kyonko asked, "Jacksonian?"

I actually knew the answer to that one. "It looks like the Aprahant Hegemony's governing philosophy is a Jacksonian Republic. That means they are your best friend and ally, unless you really piss them off, or threaten them. Then they become your worst enemy. Think of the United States of America."

"Oh I get it. Thanks."

You see, on Earth, rule number one was never attack the USA or its allies. That country, normally friendly, could change in flash if you really pissed it off. For example if you, say, tried a sneak attack against their naval base in the Pacific. Then they would really snap: Firebomb your capital to ashes, even nuke your ass. After that they'd get friendly again. I mean really friendly, help you rebuild everything, even help pay for it. The Marshall Plan.

That was what the Aprahant Hegemony was like.

I kept reading. The text under the section _Timeline_ had a notation that the Aprahanti would someday get attacked by a 'blight'. It was a 'malevolent class 2 perversion', whatever that meant. Apparently the Aprahanti believed that some foolish race will try to use it as a weapon against them or something. The act will make the Aprahanti go medieval on their sorry asses. Hmm, 'perversion'? That sounded like an awfully subjective choice of words for the DITE to use. It kind of surprised me. It must not like it very much.

I scanned through the pictures of their race. They were butterflies with big gorgeous doe-like eyes. They looked like Disney characters, so cute. One was highlighted with a name: _Durel_. He had unusual red eyes. That was probably the team leader for the proposed mission. The rest of the samples of their race had big anime eyes with other colors.

More tactical and strategic data scrolled by. The Aprahanti had an impressive space fleet, massive. They probably could really kick butt in a major space battle.

Kyonko said, "Ok, thank you Nagato. Number two, please?"

The image was scary. They were big and black bugs, a cross between a giant ant and a seven foot lobster. Ugh, they looked nasty. If I saw a creature like that in person I'd probably soil my shorts.

_Species/ID/Name: Buggers. Medians (Queen): Intel 7.3+/Tac 9.4+/Strat 3.5-/Tech 6.4+; Ethic A (See note), Govern/philo: Hive mono-sentient, with biological bias_

The scrolling text went on. The Buggers were a hive race. Only the Queen was considered sentient. She mentally controlled all the other members telepathically. The rest, the drones, were considered non-sentient, expendable. The Buggers also had a prejudice where they did not consider non-biological life to be sentient either. That included entities like the DITE and the Sky Canopy, and their representatives like Yuki or Kimidori.

In combat the Buggers' tactical ability was amazing. Their whole attack fleet could turn on a dime, and it could reconfigure itself instantly in the face of a changed tactical situation. The Queen basically tele-operated everything. It was all centrally controlled. But to me it seemed to me that the notion of central control was also the Buggers' biggest vulnerability. And they had little apparent skill with computer tech. The Queen depended solely on its own brain.

The absolute control by the Queen's mind did confer some other tactical advantages. For example, it gave the Buggers an unbeatable defense against computer-based attacks, such as a computer virus or trojan injection.

The Buggers were a very gentle race, with a high ethical standard. That is, as long as they considered you sentient, and you didn't try to atomize their entire homeworld or something.

"Thank you. Number three, please?"

_Species/ID/Name: Psychon. Medians: Intel 8.3/Tac 5.3-/Strat 6.3+/Tech 8.1+; Ethic: B, Govern/philo: Caste based (scientist/worker/artist) Note: Metamorphic._

We saw images of humanoids with a mottled stippled pattern along their faces and eyebrows. The males tended to be fat. I thought the females looked rather attractive.

The Psychon scientific caste was quite intelligent. The proposed leader for our mission was named Mentor. He was from the scientific caste. He was a large corpulent male. From his image and his fierce looks he reminded me of the loud and bombastic actor Brian Blessed.

[Hey, you know what? If BRIAN BLESSED was young, and buff, and beardless, he would be the perfect Haruki! "Diiiive!" -HuuskerDu]

The Psychons' skill with biology and genetic DNA manipulation was astounding. It was even innate. They could, with training, actually transform their own bodies to mimic any form of biologic life with roughly similar mass. They could imitate just about any kind of DNA-based creature: methane breathers, dolphins, flying reptiles. The specially trained ones like Mentor could do other amazing things too, like neutralize any poison, virus, or infection by rewriting his antibodies on the spot. He could even create biologic compounds, like poisons or medicines, right from his own body, even inject them with his finger.

The Psychons' pure science background was really deep, though it had a strong theoretical-only bias. They didn't seem to have any real engineer types. And they had no real military might, no large space fleet. Any mission using them would have to be a stealthy one.

And frankly, I felt that this mission really didn't lend itself to heavy muscle or big _Star Wars_ style space fleets. Stealth was far more likely to win the day. In my opinion the Psychons were probably the best candidate that I had seen so far. I was starting to wonder why Yuki even bothered showing us the first two candidates.

I never asked about the fifth one, the rejected one.

"Very good, and thank you. And finally number four, please?"

It was an amalgam of three races. Only four individuals were displayed. They were shown from left to right: A ball of light, two weird looking little trees with fronds, and a human.

_Species (3): Data Entity (Monolithic) / Skroderider / Human._

_Name/ID (4): Old One, Blueshell, Greenstalk, Pham Nuwen._

Then the specs followed. I barked a laugh. It was because of the image of the fourth individual, the human guy, the one on the far right.

We will get to him in a moment.

The group had submitted a proposal to send just a single ship. So any mission with them would definitely involve stealth, infiltration, deception, or smash-and-grab.

The first alien, the one on the far left, was a data entity like the DITE or the Sky Canopy, except instead of a group mind it was apparently just a single one. Old One lived in a small region of space located in the bottom blue area, near the green border. Apparently it was the team leader. According to the proposal, Old One would not be travelling with us, but rather it would be directing the others. The second in command would be the human guy.

Again, I will get to him in a moment.

The middle two individuals were weird little tree-like things with fronds. I found out they were sessile. For movement they rode around on a baroque-looking spherical metallic contraption called a skrode. Apparently the smaller blue one, named Blueshell, was good at negotiations and languages. The other one, the taller thinner green one, named Greenstalk, did tactics and support. I suspected they were a mated pair.

Kyonko was staring. Her jaw was dropped open.

It was because of the fourth individual, the human guy.

We will now get to him.

I was shaking my head and grinning like an idiot. I tried to re-read the scrolling text, which was now repeating itself, about this guy.

Kyonko was behind me, still slowly shuffling forward. She closed the gap from behind. She was hypnotized. Her jaw was still open. Before she got any closer to the image I stepped in front of her to intercept. She bumped into me like a zombie, learning forward, trying to shuffle closer, in a daze.

I couldn't really blame her. I mean, the guy in the image was a ridiculous cliché. The last time we met Kyonko, over on her world, she had joked that she liked badasses, 'big strong men', men like Haruki, She joked that was her weakness. Well, this guy was really it. I gently put my hand under her chin to close her jaw.

The guy was as tall and as muscular as Haruki, ripped, but _better_. I mean better proportioned, not quite so top-heavy, and with a cunning, steely, face, like James Bond. He had looks that women would die for. He had gray eyes and bronze skin. And unlike Haruki he was quite intelligent. And with his long mane of hair, he looked like.. like Fabio for crying out loud.

Fabio was a male model that has appeared on the cover of something like 200 different Harlequin Romance novels. I knew that because Haruhi always kept a stack of the books over on her side of the bed.

I read more of his specs. He was a combat programmer, skilled with military algorithms, stealth and tactics. Incredibly cunning and tricky. Has was also a great spaceship captain. He could pilot anything. And with a data entity backing him, he would be a formidable asset for our mission.

And.. I was still reading the text.. oh come on! He was born on a world called Canberra, a world of medieval castles and princesses. He was the son of a feudal _king_, an heir to a throne, with all the inter-family backstabbing, plotting, and killing of that HBO TV series, _Game of Thrones_. This was ridiculous. I mean, he stopped and killed his attemped assassin (with the same knife) when he was ten, for crying out loud!

No way!

I then noticed that Kurosawa was struggling to move his wheelchair to get a view. Up to this point he hadn't really seen anything because the image was at a right angle to his position, just a vertical line of changing colors. Now he wanted to know what was going on. One of the footrests of the chair got stuck under the table leg. He was jerking the chair with his upper body to try to get unstuck.

I turned back to look again at the image of the Fabio guy. I bet this clown would chase anything with a skirt. That Kyonko was underage, that Haruhi was married, that Yuki wasn't even human, I bet all of that wouldn't matter to this guy. Yare yare.

Kurosawa had finally broken free and was heading over to see.

There was absolutely no way. None. This guy had to be a send up, a joke. I rechecked specs on Old One, his known history, oh yeah. Old One liked to amuse itself. He was a cosmic-level _pranker_. This was all BS. Pham Nuwen was some kind of construct cooked up by that thing. Had to be. I mean, this guy was a total Marty Stu.

Kyonko must have figured that out too. She had to.

But even if he was obviously fake, he could still be useful. I mean, he did have real skills, and he had the backing of his own personal data entity, Old One. The DITE was banned from messing with the Sky Canopy. But Old One was not.

Kurosawa finally got a good look at the floating image. "What? Hey!"

Kyonko was slowly turning towards me.

Behind me I heard, "No way! What is this? Hey, guys!"

We slowly turned and faced each other.

"You guys, hey, wait!"

We needed to decide. We had to agree.

"So," I said to her quietly, "Butterflies, bugs, illusionist, or fake hero?"

We were motionless for a moment. Our minds met.

"Hey, I'm over here! Kyonko, we need to talk!"

There was unspoken communication, then the meeting of minds concluded, and we reached an agreement. We turned around and faced Yuki and Kurosawa.

We spoke in unison.

"Fake hero."

We then heard the loud utterance of a long string of cuss words and expletives that were completely inappropriate for me to reproduce here.

The choice had been made. I then looked over at Yuki.

Even though she had remained perfectly motionless, frozen, the whole time, and that her expression did not change at all... you know what?

I think Yuki was actually enjoying herself.

* * *

Kyonko sat back down and drank some tea. Kurosawa didn't move his chair back toward her. He was still glaring at her from his last position.

I ignored him. I said, for all of us, "So when do we go? Now?"

"No. The Entity is still analysing other several other problems related to achieving the primary objective." I remembered that she said earlier that the Entity was wrestling with several problems. The biggest immediate problem was, of course, its selection of our potential targets.

The Entity still had a lot of homework to do.

Still, this was wonderful. I hugged Yuki goodbye, Kyonko did too. Kurosawa sighed to himself, then grabbed and shook Yuki's hand. He was always polite. But I knew she didn't like the peace gesture.

I dropped Kurosawa off at his father's place and then took Kyonko home. I was looking forward to telling Haruhi the good news. I suppose I'll have to tell Koizumi too. I wasn't looking forward to that one. He'll probably have a geek-gasm. He'll hit me with a million breathless questions. He will definitely want to come on this trip.

* * *

The days passed. We were still waiting on the Entity to tell us when we could go. Meanwhile, Kyonko and the other delinquent got busted again at school and got themselves suspended for another week. It was a minor miracle that the VP had not yet threatened expulsion.

Haruhi and I made the arrangements so that, when the time came, that Tsuruya would watch the twins.

I couldn't get any work done on the computer. I was too wound up about the upcoming trip.

Koizumi was coming too, of course. I was a bit surprised that Asahina also wanted to come on the trip, but of course that was okay with me.

Now, neither Kyonko nor I told anyone else about Fabio. It was our unspoken agreement. They'll meet him soon enough, heh.

Kyonko and I were bored. Haruhi was getting really antsy.

Kurosawa kindly helped us out. His Dad invited the whole family over to his place for dinner the next night. We gladly accepted the distraction.

Kurosawa's Dad apparently did not know about the trip, or least its particulars. I wondered idly how Kurosawa was going to explain it.

We were not going to meet Mrs. Kurosawa. She was permanently bedridden at a Presbyterian facility located over on Suragawa Street. You see, Suragawa Street was basically doctors row, kind of like Harley Street in London: Offices of medical doctors, specialists, two hospitals, clinics, also a couple of nursing homes, and an assisted living facility. Asahina's secret office was also located there, in that old medical supply depot building.

Hmm, a Presbyterian facility? Christian? That was rare in Japan. Less than one percent of the population in Japan is Christian. And that statistic included every denomination: Roman Catholic, Protestant, Orthodox.

The Kurosawas were Christian? I didn't know that. The boy didn't seem like one to me, I mean with all the pranking. Though he always admitted it was harmless. I suppose maybe it was possible that he was one. But it was not any of my business to pry into other people's personal beliefs.

I was frankly relieved that I was not going to meet Mrs. Kurosawa. That poor, poor woman. I mean, paralyzed from the neck down, not able to move, just staring at the ceiling, all day, every day, the bed gimballed for rotation to avoid bedsores. That was her whole life. That was it. Just lying in bed there. Just staring at the ceiling.

What kind of life was that? The horror of it. I wondered if she cursed the fact that she was even alive.

I really, really, did not want to meet that poor woman. I honestly did not know what I could possibly say to her.

I really hoped the mission would be a success, that Kurosawa would disappear. That way I could avoid ever meeting that sad woman. And that if Kurosawa wasn't in the automobile during the car accident, that it might change events sufficiently to avoid her getting paralyzed. The Kurosawas would now be childless, of course, but they would still be a healthy and happily married couple. I really wished that would be the case.

Was the Dad a Christian? I didn't know, maybe. Again not my business. I knew that the Dad didn't seem to crack down on the kid for the repeated suspensions from school. From what I heard the kid wasn't punished at all. For that reason I had guessed that he was probably an easy going, laid back, kind of guy. Mellow. Kind of like me. He seemed maybe to be that kind of guy when I briefly talked to him before at school, during the first suspension.

I was wrong.

We arrived at the door of the Kurosawa home. It was a fairly big house, American style, rare in Japan. On the outside it was actually a bit like our own. Apparently, like Haruhi, they had money coming in from royalties or investments or something, all probably from the grandfather's films. It was way bigger than needed for a father and his son. Maybe it was inherited.

The house wasn't kept up well. From the outside it looked like a mess, overgrown weeds, paint peeling, the roof needed work.

The boy answered the door. We went inside.

The place was a pit. Stained soiled carpet, evidence of trash strewn around and hastily collected. I was immediately hit by the heavy reek of stale cigarette smoke. Dad had to be a chain smoker. My guess was confirmed when I saw the Dad again.

He looked terrible. I didn't really notice earlier how bad he looked; I was pretty distracted dealing with Kyonko at the time. He had sallow cheeks, sad eyes, tufts of gray hair, yellow stained teeth, paunch. I couldn't believe he was only 42. He looked over 60.

We were treated to KFC. I wasn't offended with the meal at all, not in the least. I sympathized perfectly with the poor guy.

Haruhi was civil; the twins were quiet.

The boy seemed happy. He was sitting with Kyonko. They gabbed. Dad gave me a wan smile. She was obviously a bright point in both their lives.

After the meal we got a quick tour. I saw that stuff was cleaned up and tossed in corners. Haruhi and I pretended to ignore it all and we smiled pleasantly during the tour. The house on the inside was big.

For some reason we got a tour of the back area. There was a lot of flotsam and jetsam that must have been sitting there for years. I saw the laundry room: A lot of old bottles of bleach, several fluffy balls of lint next to the dryer, rolls of duct tape, and a couple of large buckets of chlorine bromide tablets. The latter was an algicide for an old swimming pool in the back yard whose bottom was overgrown with weeds. Elsewhere I saw a power distribution box, apparently it was for an old lighting and audio system for the pool area. There must have been big pool parties here at one time.

There were some old film mementos on display in the living room. They were in dusty plexiglass display cases. The movie props were probably decades old. The boy was showing them proudly: a knot top wig for a samurai, a suit of armor, a prop katana. The latter was mounted on the wall. It had a lovely ebony handle and sheath. It was pulled out a few inches for display. I saw some nice gild work on the blade. Prop swords of that type were typically of pine with a silver gloss paint job. It was very good. The wall-mounted sword was not enclosed in a case.

I imagined myself wielding that sucker,

_Kyon, Big Damn Hero!_

Heh, how silly. I moved my hand to touch the blade.

The boy interrupted me, "Please don't touch that. It's delicate. Priceless."

"Oh. Sorry."

"It was one of the originals used in _The Seven Samurai_."

"Really? Wow." I turned around to face him. "I'm very sorry. I know these props can be fragile."

"That's okay. Don't worry about it."

The tour went on. I then noticed that little Ayu had run off again. She does that.

Haruhi started looking for her, a bit worried. It turned out my little pumpkin was fine. She had merely gone rooting behind the couch somewhere. She re-appeared and came up behind me. She said, "Daddy!" I saw the smiling boy look over look at her. Then his face quickly changed. He was appalled. I turned around.

The little girl was holding an empty vodka bottle.

* * *

The next day I was back at home moping, feeling antsy and bored at the same time. I still couldn't force myself to get any work done on the computer.

The day after that, on Friday, Kyonko announced that she was going over to Kurosawa's place. She said they were going to work on their homework together, assigned before they got suspended.

The boy's father was not home. He left the previous day with the car; I didn't catch why. Maybe he was going to see Mrs. Kurosawa and stay overnight, or he maybe he was doing an overnight visit with a friend. The latter was a bad thought. I didn't know, I didn't want to pry, and it was none of my business.

Hmm, homework huh? And the father was conveniently gone. I got suspicious. I bet they were meeting for some other 'extra-curricular' activities.

Kyonko had always kept insisting to me that they would never do that. I did believe her, I mean I wanted to. And I'm sure she believed that herself. But I knew that when two teenagers got alone together that things could quickly get out of hand.

The school term was ending in two weeks. Hmm.

Was this a prank planning meeting? Dang it, that probably the reason. They'd plan together a grand finale for the end of school. Of course they would!

I gave Kyonko a look. She didn't see it. She was busy putting on her cardigan. She was getting ready to go see her beloved. Then, in her pocket, her cellphone chimed. She took it out and read it. She told me she just got a text from him to cancel. She seemed disappointed.

Great, now she'll get bored again. And no school. She better not start up the pranks with me again. Ugh.

I gotta distract her. Then I got an idea. I corralled the twins. I asked her to please take the twins over to the park and watch them play. She liked the idea. She loved them both. Very good. They were gone.

* * *

Haruhi and I were alone. We were antsy. We were bored. I couldn't get any work done.

My wife then decided to take advantage of the opportunity.

She pushed me against the wall. She started grinding. C'mon, not again. Mmmm. Ok. I'll give you two days to stop that. But not a minute more.

Then there was clothing damage. I yelped, "Hey, that's my good dress shirt! You know I hate re-sewing buttons!"

She purred, "Fine, I'll just go upstairs and spend time with myself then." Then she grabbed me down there, "Hmm, it looks like you don't want me to."

She caught me. I gave her a feral grin. I swung her around, and pinned her hard against the wall, and did the rest of the clothing damage myself.

We never did get upstairs.

* * *

Afterwards, Haruhi took a shower and went to the park to join Kyonko and the twins. I stayed behind, determined to get something done on the computer. And later I would need to make dinner.

A few hours later I heard someone knocking on the front door. Hard. I opened it.

It was Koizumi. His expression was haunted. "Where is she? She's here, right? Kyonko is here? Please tell me she's here."

"She's not. What's going on?"

"Dear god, where is she? Please don't tell me she's with Kurosawa!"

That really alarmed me. "What? No. She's out with Haruhi watching the twins play over at the park. What happened?"

"Oh thank god. If she's with Haruhi she's safe."

I grabbed his collar. "Koizumi, tell me right now exactly what happened or so help me.."

"Ok, ok. Let me sit down."

I brought him in. He sat at the breakfast nook. He was shaken.

"Koizumi, what happened?"

He looked at me. "Kyon, I'm really sorry to have to tell you this."

"What? What happened?"

"It's, it's about Kurosawa. He was.. attacked at home. I got alerted by SkyCom when they picked it up on the wideband scanner, you know, the automated voice keyword scan. I pulled the data feed on the police report."

A surge of adrenaline hit my stomach. It felt like I was punched in the gut.

Wait.. no..

"I'm sorry, Kyon. He's dead."

I was frozen.

"He's dead. Murdered."

Time stopped. I'm not sure what happened next. I might have said something like.. 'How?' or 'Why?' I was in shock.

"Kyon, listen to me. I think Kyonko was the real target. According to the report the father wasn't around for some reason. Car was gone. They can't find him to notify him. Do you know where he is? Is he out of town?"

Koizumi was flicking through his holographic tablet. The glass display was smuged with palm sweat. "Kyonko and the boy, do you know if they were they planning to meet at the house today?"

"Kyonko.. said.. going to do.. homework together.."

"Oh.. god.. I never put a P.O.I. detail on her! Istuko did it on Haruki's world, but I didn't in our world. Why did I biff that? It's my fault. Oh god I'm so sorry. The kid was a sitting duck. The enemy must have overheard the meeting plan. Monitored for it. Watching."

He clawed at his skull with both hands and started to think. "Oh, I got it! I bet earlier they observed the father leaving in his car. Then they knew Kyonko would be alone with that wheelchair kid, vulnerable. That's gotta be it, they intercepted the cellphone traffic, knew she was coming, she was their target."

He continued, "From the police report they had to be waiting for a while. They were hiding and waiting outside, waiting for her to show up. But Kurosawa spotted them first. Argh! Kyon, did Kyonko tell you anything?"

I pressed my hands to my head to try to remember. "Uh, Yeah.. Uhm. Let me see."

I was really rattled. "Let me think. Kyonko told me that Kurosawa had sent her an encrypted SMS message to her cellphone. I think he cancelled their meeting." I knew they sometimes encrypted their messages to each other to hide their prank plans.

"Encrypted, good. That probably saved her life. They didn't know she wasn't coming. It must have been a couple hours before they figured it out. Meanwhile, they were quietly laying in wait for the ambush, just like a pride of lions hiding the grass waiting for a zeebra. The boy must have spotted them."

"Then Kyonko's in danger! She went out with Haruhi and the twins to the park!"

"No, it's okay. She's safe with you guys. I'm sure your family is all safe too."

"How can you be you so sure?"

"The enemy would never dare attack her with you or Haruhi around. They believe you're watched by the Organization, that you are still a P.O.I. And they would absolutely avoid Haruhi at all costs. Nobody knows the extent of Haruhi's full power if she was directly attacked. She could literally wish them all away."

I could only manage a single word.. "Why?"

"Kyon, it was an attack aimed at Kyonko. That means it was an attack against _us_, against the Brigade. All of us. I think they want to get us to stop the search for the hypersphere. They must think killing Kyonko would do that. It would stop the search. I think Kurosawa was just collateral damage.

"The report said there was blood everywhere. And most of it wasn't his. He put up a helluva fight."

"I.. I have to tell Kyonko." Oh no, please god no. Tell me this didn't happen. She'll fall apart. Please god no.

How can I possibly explain it to her? How could I even look at her? She'd blame me for it. And she'd be right. Haruhi and I were the ones that pushed them together. She'd also blame herself, that he'd still be alive if it wasn't for her falling in love with him.

I fumbled with my cell phone. My hands were so shaky I couldn't dial the number. I finally was able to reach Haruhi on her cell and told her what happened. She and Kyonko would be coming home soon from the park. I told her not to leave Kyonko's side under any circumstances. She was not to tell her anything and bring her straight home. I told her to make an excuse for my being gone.

I then texted to everyone "Theta 708". It was Theta protocol, a call for an emergency meeting of all the old Brigade members. Koizumi had long ago set up the protocol, right after the Brigade disbanded. 708 meant to meet at Nagato's apartment.

It was never used before.

* * *

Later that evening we were all gathered at Nagato's apartment. Koizumi hooked his fancy holographic tablet, using its HDMI cable, to a conventional HD projector. Several images appeared on the wall in quick succession. It showed several police photographs and documents. He laid out his analysis. "It looks like Kurosawa quickly improvised some traps."

Apparently the boy had immediately spotted the attackers gathering outside. He had a couple hours to plan a defense.

"When the attackers finally hit, the kid took out at least a dozen of them. Finally he must have yanked the katana off the wall. That thing was a _real_ katana, not a movie prop."

Koizumi looked down. "In the end he must have charged his attackers like a real samurai in one of his great-grandfather's films."

It amazed me how a child so small and seemingly helpless could wreak so much havoc on an elite armed military attack force.

"It appears he was able to write a message, a priority e-mail message to Kyonko. The police found it on his laptop." Koizumi projected it on the wall.

_I spotted them with the IR scope. I sent off a text to you just before they cut power. I hope you got it. Stay away. WiFi, Wi-Max, 4G jammed. I'll try to send this through the unidirectional antenna pointed at the neighbor's open AP._

Koizumi said, "The e-mail message never got through. The enemy was using a military-grade broadband scrambler to jam every frequency. That was risky. A scrambler that powerful could have easily attracted police attention."

_They're waiting for you. I will keep them busy as long as possible._

_I set up some good traps. The pool mainline hotwired to both doors, bleach grenade, chlorine bomb, battery acid, duct tape mesh, gas oven with remote Bic. Hey I'm like Macaulay Culkin in Home Alone! You would love it._

_I got an awesome point defense weapon. I hid it in my chair frame. If they catch me and wheel me to their leader, and I refuse to tell him where you are hiding, and then, when he finally gives up on me and aims his pistol at my temple for the coup de grâce, I'll go for a decapitation. Banzai!_

_Be with Haruki. It is your destiny. Whatever happens you need to fight on. Don't give up. Be strong._

_Everything has a purpose. Tell Mom what happened. I love you._

* * *

Koizumi looked up, his eyes unfocused. "Man, I would have loved to have seen that fight."

I wiped my eyes. I would have too. The kid was a hero.

He went on, "It looks like all the injuries that he had inflicted on his attackers appeared to have been non-fatal, except for the last one. Given the amount of blood I think he got his final wish. The police found a 19mm pistol in that mess. It was probably the team leaders's weapon.

There was a buzz on the intercom. Nagato pushed the button.

"Kyon, let me up. Or so help me you're going to wake up bald and neutered tomorrow."

I sighed. It was Kyonko. "Let her in." Nagato buzzed her in.

I opened the door. She marched in.

Haruhi was right behind her. "I tried to stop her, Kyon. You told me to follow her no matter what."

I asked, "The twins?"

"They're with Kimidori."

"That's good." Emiri Kimidori was Yuki's backup Humanoid Interface. She could protect them.

Kyonko quickly scanned the room. Everyone was here. Everyone that is, except..

"Akira? Where is he?"

I gently held her arm. "Let's go in the other room."

She ripped her arm away. "No. Tell me. Tell me now!"

Everyone was watching. This was going to be the hardest thing I have ever done.

"I'm sorry.."

"Wounded or dead?"

"I am so sorry.."

I expected her to break down. I was wrong. She hardened. "Dead then."

I didn't know what to say. I wanted to hug her so much. I couldn't speak.

She was cold. "So, did he have time?"

"Yeah, he did. He was amazing."

Her eyes were steel. She crossed her arms. "Good."

She moved behind us to watch the presentation. She said simply, "Go."

I simply stared at her. Her mind was already racing, absorbing the information. She was that fast.

Koizumi stood there for a moment. Then he blinked his eyes. "Uh, yes, let me continue. Anyway, as I was about to say, the enemy removed most of their injured mooks. But in their haste to retreat one got left behind."

Kyonko rapidly scanned the info on the wall. "Left behind?"

"The police have him in custody. One of the minions of our unknown enemy. He tried to run through a web of duct-tape and got stuck. Kurosawa captured one of the bad guys for us. He did us a huge favor. An interrogation should give us some quality intel about the nature of our enemy."

I nodded. "Good. I want to get those bastards."

Kyonko looked at me. "No, Kyon. This is not about revenge."

"They killed Kurosawa!"

"Yes. He gave his life to save me. To save what I represent. To restore a lost world. A single life is a small price to pay for a whole world."

It sounded like she was trying to rationalize the butchering of a small child. They killed him! What was going on?

"His father lost the most precious thing he had, his son. Akira willingly sacrificed himself, shed his blood. He did it to save a whole world, to save me. Because he loved me.

"He did it without hesitation. He didn't run, he didn't hide, he didn't beg for mercy. He was surrounded. He calmly waited for the inevitable. Then he paid the price."

She wasn't crying. She would grieve later. In private. I'll be there for you, Kyonko.

I knew later she would grieve alone at night in her room. It would take a lot of time, but I knew that with my help she would heal in time. There might be a permanent scar on her heart, but I knew she would eventually get better.

"He did it for me. He did it for us. He did it to save a whole world."

Then she did something I had never seen before. She looked up at the ceiling. She _smiled_.

Asahina began to cry. Koizumi comforted her. Haruhi buried her head in my shoulder sleeve to hide her silent tears.

Yuki lowered her head 12 degrees. Even she was profoundly moved.

Kyonko's words, her gentle, beatific, upward smile, was like a painting of the Madonna. It effected everyone deeply. Everyone was moved.

Wait, something was wrong. I could feel it. It tickled the back of my brain. It nagged me. What was really going on here?

That girl was so strong. If it was me I would not have have smiled like that. There was no way.

Oooohhh...

Hmm.

You see, I knew Kyonko. Swap the X chromosome for Y and she was literally me.

If I was her, I might have said those soft words about the love of my life dying to save me. But I would not have smiled like that. That gentle upward smile. Something was off.

You see, during the eight months that we had spent together I had come to know Kyonko better than anyone. It was almost like a telepathic connection. I knew her. During these past eight months she really has become my daughter, and I was really her father.

And I loved her, more than you could possibly imagine.

But those words, that beatific upward smile, that look of a Madonna. Something was definitely off. Something wasn't right about it.

Could it.. I mean.. those words.. was this all just a deception?

She wouldn't do that to her own closest friends, would she? No, she was just fooling herself. That had to be it. Oh dear god I hope so. I could still help her. Otherwise..

Oh my poor Kyonko, what is going on with you? What are you doing?

No.. wait.. no.. don't. Don't do this to me.

Then it happened. The thing that terrified and hurt me at the same time. Something so awful, it slammed me in the gut. It hurt me so deeply, it was like a gunshot.

Oh no.. don't.. stop it.. please don't do this.. oh god please don't. Please.

Don't do it. Please don't do it. I love you. Don't do this to me. Please.. please.

She did it.

She really did it.

I could not believe it. She did it.

This is what she did: She lowered her head. Then she turned to look slowly directly at me with that smile. She did it. She hit me with that same beatific smile. She hit me with it directly. Aimed directly at me.

She had a tear in her eye. I knew. That was it.

Our relationship was over.

That gentle smile. That smile will haunt me for the rest of my life. That smile.

That smile was deliberate. It was cold. It was calculated. It had six very specific purposes.

Number 1: She let me know that she was not fooling herself.

Number 2: She let me know that she literally did not give a damn.

Number 3: She let me know that if I got in her way, she would kill me without hesitation.

Number 4: That she was dead. Emotionally dead. And she knew it.

Number 5: It was her way of saying goodbye.

Number 6: She did not expect to survive.

Then she simply turned away. She was back to business. Just like that.

Her heart was dead.

The rest of the Brigade, they way they looked at her in those tears. She faked them out deliberately. She did it to get their sympathy and grab control. Away from me. It was that fast, that slick. She was that good.

The Brigade now gave her their complete, utter, and absolute loyalty. They would do anything for her, die for her.

I sighed with the realization that I was no longer the leader of the SOS Brigade. (I mean the real leader. Everybody except Haruhi had always known that.)

My sigh was deliberate. It was a signal back to her. My sighing informed her that I would not challenge her control. I surrender.

I did it because I wasn't going to give up on her. Otherwise she'd just kick me out. That way she'd let me stay.

The new leader of the SOS Brigade was now Kyonko.

She had taken us over without anyone realizing it. Except maybe Yuki.. only she would remain loyal to me. I would have to ask her privately later.

As far as Kyonko was concerned, I was now just one of her minions. She didn't give a damn.

She was now on a quest. She was Captain Ahab. The hypersphere was now the White Whale. It was a quest driven by cold hidden hate.

The was the new Kyonko. The new cold, hard, steel Kyonko. She would hide her blackened heart from everyone and fool them all. Everyone except me.

She knew that too. That was the reason for the smile. It was a deadly warning to me. She probably even thought she was doing me a favor.

Yuki would very likely still side with me. It occurred to me that since I had Yuki's ear, and since she was the most important member on the quest, that I actually still did have some power. Hmm, if I was Kyonko I would start maneuvering Kimidori into play, Yuki's backup. I would try to ease her in somehow without arising too much suspicion.

Would could I do to save her? If I tried to grab and hug and hold Captain Ahab too hard, she would just boot me out.

Would she really do that? Yeah she would. In a nanosecond.

But I knew our new leader still needed me. I was still useful. I controlled Haruhi. So Kyonko still needed me. She couldn't boot me.

She's working out contingencies. If I threatened to walk out, she would need a backup plan to grab Haruhi from me.

Yeah, she could do it. Easily. It won't be too hard for a champion deceiver. Now, she wouldn't try to get Haruhi to hate me, or divorce me, or anything like that. Haruhi was as willful as a supersonic missile. But a missile can be easily redirected with chaff. She would appeal to her good nature, to her mothering side.

I can't fight her. I can't argue it logically. This was an emotional problem. Kurosawa's death has broken her heart. How, how, can I help her heal? This was a problem of the heart, not the head.

If the boy was still alive he would be appalled at what she was doing. What an irony.

She had emotionally severed my connection with her. Her defenses were up now against me; her shields were up. No matter what I said, she wouldn't listen to me now.

I needed help.

* * *

She was now back in business like nothing had happened. Nobody else picked up on that. They were still trying to recover emotionally.

Our new leader calmly walked up to the projection on the wall, casting her black shadow upon it. "They wouldn't have launched a direct attack unless they thought we might succeed. We must be on the right track with our search plan."

Koizumi said, "I think you are right. So what do we do?"

She whirled around. I had a brief vision of a Norse Valkyrie, a war goddess. "We take the mission. We get the hypersphere."

"But.."

She took a step towards us. Her face was lit up with numbers and images. It was terrifying to look at.

"We leave Earth. We get the hypersphere. The Enemy, it isn't vengeful. All they want to do is prevent anyone from getting it. They tried here on Earth to stop us, but they failed. If we leave Earth, they will follow us. Earth will be left alone."

I understood. Our loved ones would be safe.

What we would learn later was that I had already seen our attackers, our real Enemy. I would be the one to figure it out. I would figure out it later from what I had already seen, from Yuki's list of candidate alien races to ferry us on our mission, from the nature of these races, from the nature of reality, from what my other Brigade friends had told us.

I would uncover the Dragon, the wetware operative that got its hands bloody and did the dirty work. And I had also already seen the Big Bad, the entity that was pulling the strings, directing the Dragon in its campaign of True Evil. I didn't realize it yet, but they were all right there, right in front of us.

Kyonko was hidden steel.

She walked slowly towards Haruhi, then she put her hand on Haruhi's shoulder. Haruhi turned and looked at her without a sound. The physically frail woman then said, "And being off planet will give us.. room to maneuver."

So, Kyonko was already working out a plan.

I could see Haruhi's anger building up. An anger that was directed against our unknown Enemy.

I now knew the one thing in this universe that was truly terrifying. The one thing that was more terrifying than our Enemy. The one thing even more terrifying than an angry Haruhi with her powers active.

It was the most terrifying this in this universe.

It was the cold hard steel hatred of Kyonko.

* * *

**A/N:**

Dear reader, in this chapter I played my first ace card. I have just played the Ace of Spades. I have three other aces hidden up my sleeve.

The Ace of Spades is the card of death. In this chapter I have presented you with four kinds of death: mortal (Akira), spiritual (his father), bodily (his mother), and emotional (steel Kyonko). One of them is a fake out. I'll come clean with it in the next chapter.

Our story has now changed. It is a now a murder mystery, like an Agatha Christie mystery novel. The mystery is wrapped in layers.

Now, Agatha Christie cheats. I don't like that. In her mystery novels she leaves out crucial information until the very last pages of her book, making it impossible for the reader to figure out whodunnit before the big reveal.

I promise I'll play fair with you when I reveal the Big Bad, and later its Dragon. Right now I have two candidates for each, but I have not yet decided which pair I will pick. Once I decide, a few chapters from now, you will start to see the plot move slowly in that direction. Now, with one pair I might pull a stunt (think _The Murder of Roger Ackroyd_). I don't know yet if I want use that trick (it's controversial), but you'll see it coming if you read closely.

Please be happy for poor Kurosawa. He went out with guns blazing, much like Dr. Mordin in _Mass Effect 3_, another weakling science geek who used his wits to win an impossible military battle for his team.

For Kurosawa's battle I was inspired by John Dreamer's fan soundtrack for Dr. Mordin's death scene in _Mass Effect 3_, called _End of My Journey_. The video can be found on YouTube. Search for "Mass Effect 3 EPIC MUSIC End of My Journey (Mordin's song)". Be sure you pick the video that says "EPIC MUSIC" (all caps).

Please play that YouTube AMV, as you imagine in your mind's eye, what must have happened in that epic battle in that old dirty cluttered house between the wheelchair kid and the elite military assault team. I dare you to not tear up while watching that amazing AMV. I have watched it more than a dozen times, and it still chokes me up. John Dreamer's soundtrack is incredible. Someone in Hollywood please hire him!

Needless to say, the events in this chapter have profoundly affected our poor heroine. She has become hard, and she is no longer a mischievous child. Her heart is black; she has completely shut out Kyon. And she is quickly building up a furious, cosmic, righteous anger. She will soon become _royally_ pissed at the Higher Power that was ultimately responsible for doing it (that is, with me. I better watch my back!)

This happens a lot in real life. That is, people get angry at God for the bad things that happen to them or their loved ones. Why does God allow that? Why does He permit evil? Or terrible accidents? Horrible diseases? Natural disasters? Who is this God person anyway to allow all this awful stuff to happen?

He seems like a jerk. Let's just kill him. Get rid of him. Forget him. Move on. It is the basis of hard atheism. It is a very understandable human response.

So why did I murder Kyonko's first true love? Kyonko is going to ask me that question and she will demand an answer from me. What should I say?

The question demands an answer. It must be answered. Why does God allow bad things to happen to good people? This difficult topic will be explored, in depth, in chapter 10.

It is by far the hardest philosophical topic that I have ever attempted to tackle in public writing. I've been wrestling with the topic for weeks.

My approach is finally, slowly, starting to take shape. I will soon play the King of Hearts and the King of Clubs. (Over in my forum I wrote King of Diamonds, but that is an error.) The King of Hearts is now locked and loaded and ready to fire. However, I am a bit nervous about playing that club card. I have never seen anyone take the philosophical approach I plan to use, at least that I am aware of. It is a tactical nuke against my opponent's argument. With the King of Clubs I am making an audacious claim how God _might _think. I'm not saying He is, just that He might possibly think that way. It very nicely answers the question of why God allows bad things to happen to good people. I still need to work on it though because the implications are enormous about what it implies about God's ultimate scheme of things.

The person fighting in the red corner of the ring (for Team Atheist) will be my wrestling opponent, the French philosopher Voltaire and his story _Candide_. Voltaire mocks God mercilessly for allowing evil and disaster to continually befall humanity. Over in the blue corner of the ring will be my ally, Mrs. Kurosawa. She will be the only real Christian that appears in this entire story. She will be laying out my cards for me.

It looks like this is going to be an epic battle.

* * *

**A/N Update:**

**Warning to reviewers.**

Please do _not_ post spoilers about this chapter in the reviews. I want it to be a complete surprise for future readers.

* * *

**A/N Update:**

At this point in the story I will clue you in on its true overall narrative structure.

You see, back when I was young my two favorite stories were _Star Wars_ and J. R. R. Tolkein's _Lord of the Rings _novels. They both had a very similar narrative structure. It is called an exponential protagonist arc.

In an exponential protagonist arc, events just keep getting bigger and bigger for our hero. The story starts small. First we are introduced to the protagonist (Luke Skywalker, Frodo). Then we see his immediate family (Aunt Beru & Uncle Owen, Bilbo). We meet some of his friends. Then he meets a wise person that clues him in that something bigger is going on offstage (Obi-Wan, Gandalf). That is Kyonko's role in the beginning of my story.

Then the story starts to speed up. We see a whole town (Mos Eisley, Bree). Then the Enemy's mooks appear and the protagonist leaves the town in a hurry with the mooks chasing him. (This will happen in Chapter 15.)

Then we go even faster: we see whole races and powerful political organizations. Then we see the first major battle. Then it hits an inflection point. The story goes straight up. Finally, the protagonist is saving the whole galaxy or all of Middle Earth.

This story has the same structure. Why? Because I like that kind of story. It is fun to write.

I am now pressing down on the gas pedal. Later on I will slam my foot through the floor, and the story will be kicked up to an insane level. By the end it will soar higher than anything I have ever read or imagined before. (Hint: Buzz Lightyear)

I can't wait.

-HuuskerDu

P.S. Unfortunately the story will take a lot of timeouts during the philosophical debates. I know they drag the story, but it can't be helped. You can skip them if they bore you.

P.P.S. I admit I was fooling you earlier, making you think this was just a typical Japanese anime fan fic about a high school romance story in classroom 3-1. Nope!

* * *

**A/N Update:**

I am still struggling with Chapter 10 (tentative title: The Spinning Bed.) Unfortunately all the time I have spent on writing this story has begun to have a deleterious impact on my business operation and my software release schedule. (Microsoft Windows 8.1 is coming out already? Gaaah!) And my company has some major contractual obligations with certain private colleges that are keeping me really busy. It might be a while before I will be able to fully work out chapter 10, get it beta reviewed, and posted.

Please click the 'Follow Story' button to get notified.

If you like the story and want more, please click on 'Favorite Story'. I am competing against over 1,800 fan fics in the Haruhi Suzumiya Series section, some of which have hundreds and hundreds of Follow/Favorite/Reviews.

Now, I see a lot of you are clicking on 'Favorite Author' instead of 'Favorite Story'. That is very nice and I am flattered. But I do want to ask you to also click on 'Favorite Story' as well. I am trying to kick up this story's ranking in the Haruhi Suzumiya series section, and I need you to click on 'Favorite Story' to kick it up higher. (Ditto 'Follow Story' if you clicked on 'Follow Author').

Also _please_ give me reviews for the same reason. In the review you can just post 'Cool!' or 'Great!' or 'Sucks!' :-) or whatever. I would really appreciate it. You don't have to sign in or have a logon account to post a quick review.

We are not yet to the halfway point in the story. My best guess is that it will top out at around 100,000 words or so. (It depends on how discursive I make the philosophical debates.) I promise that I _will_ finish it. I have worked out the whole plot all the way to the end. In fact the very first thing I wrote was the final chapter. (I wrote it way back even before I wrote _Realization._)

The end of this story is a mega-wham. I get to play my two final aces in my game with you. (It will be the Ace of Diamonds and the Ace of Hearts.) I can't wait to play them.

* * *

**A/N Update:**

To keep you entertained, below is a summary of Chapter 11.

**Chapter 11: Kyon Goes to Hell**

In this chapter, Kyon asks Mrs. Kurosawa if he is going to hell. She says yes. Kyon is offended and demands to know if Gandhi or Buddha are going to hell. She says yes again. Kyon is incredulous. His reaction is very understandable. Atheists jump on it all the time.

Then Mrs. Kurosawa explains what hell really is. When Jesus uses the word _Gehenna_, I think he is using it quite deliberately as a metaphor for what hell is like. You see, in the 1st century everybody in Jerusalem knew exactly what Gehenna meant (Hebrew: _Gehinnom_). It was a a literal place, a garbage dump right outside of town. It was a large depression just outside the wall of the city called the Valley of Hinnom. (Gehinnom - Hinnom) People tossed their trash out over the city wall, and it fell and accumulated in the valley below.

For over hundreds of years all that garbage had accumulated in thick layers of refuse, of decaying organic matter, that decomposed into methane gas. From the wall of Jerusalem you could look down and literally see all these little fires burning all over that valley. You can still see those fires today at big municipal garbage dumps, where pipes are stuck into the ground to burn off the waste methane gas.

In other words, I think that Jesus is saying that hell is like a garbage dump.

Mrs. Kurosawa draws some heart-rending analogies: First, from the movie _Toy Story 2_, the sad music montage when the little girl tosses Jessie on the side of the road and drives off. She cites a second analogy from Spielberg's movie _A.I. Artificial Intelligence_, when David's mother drives into the woods and abandons David there. Both are very sad scenes.

So, in my view, Hell is when God gives up on you.

The way I see it, when you die your data is done. Your data goes into a final storage container where it is no longer fully actualized in physical reality. Can't change it. Game Over.

The chapter then digresses a bit and reviews Kyon's examples of good people that shouldn't be going to hell. For example, Gandhi was actually a sneaky bastard who got a lot of people killed. It was for a good cause, but he's no saint. Buddha is a special case that I might digress on a bit.

I believe that going to Gehenna is not punishment (that is something else, see below), it is just the default place where everyone and everything eventually ends up that isn't able to join up with God.

Now, I think there is a kind of self-inflicted punishment in Gehenna: It is established in the Bible that when you are there, you know that you are there (your data is not stored passively). This is when you kick yourself for eternity about how you messed up.

Kyon then asks if babies and young children go to hell. Mrs. K says that unfortunately they do, but since they aren't self-aware it's not really that bad for them. (The more you realize what you are missing out on, the more you kick yourself in the end. )

You see, you can't just go up and hang out with God on your own. You literally can't get there from here (an upper reality). God in His true form is so transfinite, so beyond us, so alien to our human experience, so powerful, that a direct face-to-face relationship is simply impossible. We'd literally get incinerated. Moses had the closest thing to direct contact, and he almost got fried.

There is only one way to get there. God gave us his avatar, his Humanoid Interface so to speak, to let us reach Him. This is when I throw down a big club or heart card. I use it to create an analogy of what God's avatar is like: I reveal that Yuki actually _is_ the DITE, fully realized, in humanoid form. I really toyed with that idea, it's a great twist, that Yuki declares she is the DITE itself. (It is canon that the DITE is so alien that humans cannot communicate with it directly.) I'm not actually doing it because it would have messed up my future plans for her character.

Now, there is a certain locution Jesus uses in Mark 9:43, where He warns you really, really don't want "to go into Gehenna, into the unquenchable fire." The implication is that you really don't want to be tossed into it, which again neatly fits with the garbage pile metaphor (_Gehenna _is always a metaphor. That name is for a real physical place that everyone knows, so it's use is always metaphorical.). I think He is using exactly that metaphor in 9:43. Gehenna, God's junk pile. And the junk pile outside Jerusalem_ is_ always burning with all those fires. An they are literally unquenchable. And everything Jesus says is true.

But be careful. Read it again.

The explicit connection of _fire_ to _torment_ isn't actually there.

Yes, you are tormented, yes there is fire, but work it out and you see it is correlation, not causation. (I admit it might the fire that is directly torturing you, but a close reading does _not_ demand it. )

I think in Mark 9:43 he's using really strong language to shake you up. (He's very good at that.) He is trying to literally put the fear of God in you. He is warning you that you really, really, really, do not want to end up in the garbage pile.

Now, there is another hell in the Bible called the Lake of Fire. In my opinion I think that is something very different. (I'll grant it might be the same place as Gehenna, but I suspect not.)

The Lake of Fire appears in the Book of Revelation, during the End Times. It is mentioned nowhere else in the NT.

Death gets thrown into the Lake of Fire. So does the Anti-Christ. So does Satan himself. All of Team Evil gets chucked in. But be careful. Read it again.

I'll give you one sly hint: Satan is not the leader of Hell. He does not run it.

Ok, I'll give you a bigger hint: Satan is the _victim_ of Hell. He is God's prosecutor, God's accuser, God's tempter. It's just his job. Satan (the word comes from _Shaitan_, which literally means 'accuser') is very good at his job, and he relishes it, and I think he even volunteered for the job. The Angel of Light did indeed rebel against the Father, but I think he knew the future of his doom when signed up for his job. He goes diving in. In my vision he even salutes God before he jumps in, almost voluntarily, like "Hey, I'm done. This is gonna suck. Oh well, it was a good run. Adios muchachos."

I'm hinting at something really deep here. There is something very important going on with all this fire chucking at the end of God's story (especially the Second Death). Really, I mean it. It's deeeeep. Hint: Read it again. Think about what I just said about correlation and causation. The Book of Revelation is all true. It's all literally true.

But I spotted something, something huge. And it's staring you right in the face. It's plain as day.

Actually I can't take credit for it. I really wish I could. If this concept gets wide publication it might even be named after me, heh. (Oops, I forgot I'm anonymous, dang it.)

I was really tempted to steal it.

(Badda-boom! Thank you folks for your tepid applause. I'll be here all week, the name's HuuskerDu. Try the veal!)

Anyway, where was I? Oh yeah, I won't steal the ideal and claim credit for it, even though I was tempted.

You see, I subscribe to a monthly magazine called _Midnight Call_. It is run by a guy named Arno Froese. The magazine discusses prophecies of the upcoming Tribulation and the End Times, and it ties them into current world events. (I think he gets a little carried away sometimes, e.g., about Saddam Hussein back in 2003, but some of his current predictions do have merit, especially the ones about the future of the world's economic and monetary systems.) I like reading Arno's stuff because he's always intellectually honest with himself, even through he is really hard core. If he's wrong about a prophecy (for example, Saddam = Anti-Christ) he admits it and moves on.

Now, in that magazine there is a Letters to the Editor section. Arno loves to wrestle with the writers and accepts all comers (including atheists) into his playground. One day I read a letter that somebody wrote to Arno asking about a theory that he had heard about what the the Lake of Fire really is. The theory the writer presented absolutely _rattled_ me. It blew me away. I have never seen anything remotely like it before. From the way that Arno Froese replied I suspect it gave even him some pause. He didn't just flatly dismiss it like he usually did. He grudgingly admitted the theory might be possible, but said there was no way to know.

This innovative theory might be wrong, but it is _really_ elegant, it fits the Bible perfectly in that 'oh-it-is-so-obvious-now' head-slapping kind of way, and it ties into a bunch of other things, including some things that even atheists must accept. It is a total mind screw, and I won't reveal it here.

Eventually, I will remove this placeholder and rewrite Chapter 11 as a dialog between Mrs. K and Kyon. The Lake of Fire idea will be assigned as a high club card, a jack, maybe even queen or better. Not sure yet. It's a doozy of an idea. I gotta be careful, though, that I don't use up all my high card slots too quickly.

-HuuskerDu

P.S. There is also a third kind of hell that Jesus mentions (the gap and Abraham's Bosom). It seems to be maybe a sort of a cross connect between the other two. But I think it is too much inside baseball for this story (there is some confusion about if this is just Jesus' parable versus a real place).

Another special case is Revelation 14:9-11. But it happens deep into the Tribulation, and it requires willful apostasy - the worship of the Beast and the receiving its of its Mark - in the face of incredible evidence that Bad Stuff is Happening. So I suspect it simply means that anybody who willfully marches alongside the Anti-Christ and his pals to the bitter end basically deserves what they get.

And then there is something called conditionalism, which is gaining popularity in certain evangelical circles. It neatly answers the objections of the atheists, but in a different way. I am wary of conditionalism because the cults have glomped onto it (Seventh Day Adventists and Jehovah's Witnesses), and I already know their Biblical exegesis is really whack, so that makes me skeptical right off the bat. I need to research it some more.

* * *

**A/N Update:**

I had an epiphany! I'm moving the Lake of Fire towards the end of the story. Oh wow! What an ending kicker! I'm slapping my head like ten times. It is so perfect! Why didn't I see it? It was staring me right in the face the whole time!

I think I'm gonna do a Tim LaHaye. I wasn't planning on it, but yeah, it works so well. (Hint: _Left Behind_).

Ok, I'll explain why I wasn't gonna do that. First, it's been done. And I have real issues with LaHaye's novel series about the End Times. Volume 1 was good (not great, good), future volumes coasted, then it went into the weeds IMHO. The problem I suspect was that the publisher demanded too many sequels and he ran out of gas. And there were other big problems. Atheists mock it and I see why.

So I wasn't gonna do the End Times. But now, yeah, I'm gonna do it. (Just part of it. I'm being sly here.) (Hint: White Throne.)

It works sooo well.

Can't wait.

* * *

**A/N Update:**

Below is some more entertainment for you while I'm off working on Chapter 10. It is a sneak peek at a scene in a future chapter. Another example of my weird sense of humor...

**Chapter xx**

In our little spaceship cabin, Haruhi was undressing herself. I was in the lower bunk. Hers was the upper bunk. She then got in with me, on rather on me.

It was cramped. I said, "There's an upper bunk, you know."

"It's not getting any use tonight," she purred. A few years back we had almost become members of the Mile High Club, but the flight attendants caught us. Haruhi had tried to protest her innocence, but after 9/11 they had no sense of humor. They almost turned the plane around.

While sharing the lower bunk with me she went to work on having us join the Million Mile High Club. I wondered about how sound proof the bulkheads were. During one of Haruhi's more enthusiastic maneuvers the bunk broke and we hit the floor. I got a good bruise from that, but I was proud to report that I was still able to do my duty. Afterwards we ended up wrapped together asleep on the upper bunk.

The next morning we had breakfast in the mess hall with the rest of the team. Haruhi was sitting on the bench opposite me alongside Koizumi. They were gabbing enthusiastically about the mission. Kyonko was sitting quietly beside me on the bench that was located on the other side of the table.

Kyonko put down her chopsticks, leaned over to me, and whispered, "So, 'Oh god please stop!' is her go code, huh? What's the real stop code?"

Hoo boy. This was really embarrassing.

Oh well. I whispered back, "Puppies."

"I want some of your earplugs."

"Sorry."

"Uhm, Kyon? I just realized something."

"Hmm?"

"Years from now.. I mean if Haruki is anything like Haruhi.. uh.." She was blushing.

"Yes?"

"Uhm, how will I.. with him.. you know.. not be so.. you know.. with me.." Her voice trailed off.

"You mean how to keep him from accidentally putting you in the hospital?"

"Uh.. yeah.." She was clearly embarrassed.

That was actually a very good question. Hmm. How to keep the Man of Steel from injuring the Woman of Kleenex? I thought for a moment.

"Puppies."

"Oh. Uh, thanks.."

I smiled inwardly. A healthy father-daughter talk.

I looked up and noticed that Haruhi was staring at us, and Koizumi was looking down busy picking lint from his tunic. They must had caught the last half of our conversation. Hey, Haruhi was actually blushing! Up until that moment I had thought she was physically incapable of self-embarrassment. Wow. Will wonders never cease?

Kyonko was staring down at her food.

I shrugged and continued to eat.

* * *

**A/N Update:**

I got my hands on the ninth Haruhi Suzumiya light novel, _The Dissociation of Haruhi Suzumiya_. It features a multiverse plot like _Final Act_. Wow! I gotta work that in! It plugs right into my multiverse crossover space-quest arc (chapters 15 thru roughly 20). It fits so neatly. I mean, it's like I designed it that way right from the beginning or something. (I didn't, honest.)

The 10th and 11th light novels are not yet released in English: _The Surprise of Haruhi Suzumiya (First Half)_ and _The Surprise of Haruhi Suzumiya (Second Half)_. The hardcover translation will be out in November 2013. Until then I am trying to find a doujin or an amateur translation (or even a plot summary) that I can work from.

There is also some good source material from the 7th light novel, _The Intrigues of Haruhi Suzumiya_, that I might also work in. It has to do with time travel paradoxes.

I need to be careful using the LNs as sources, however, as I can't expect my readers to have read them. And I also want to avoid spoiling them.


End file.
